We’ve hurt the birthday boy’s feelings?

[sidneytweeney]

So my son who is 8 has been invited to his friend’s birthday party next weekend. Another mum who I am friends with has asked me to take her son to the party too as she is working (he’s been invited.) I’ve agreed to do this and to help my friend out further, her son is going to be having a sleepover at mine in the night of the party. (Mum friend is a single parent, works as a nurse) The birthday boy is staying at his grandparents after his party in order to see extended family for his birthday. Birthday boy’s mum texted me this morning to say that I had disappointed birthday boy by organising a fun sleepover to which birthday boy can’t come. She said I had ‘taken the shine off his special day.’ Unless I’m missing a higher chunk of social awareness , this woman is batshit right?

Silly woman.

Yes I agree. What can you say. And you can't exactly beg her to change her mind as you've done nothing wrong.

She sounds like someone keen to cut her (son's) nose off to spite his face. What a nutter.

Kids will talk but I have had plenty of birthday parties and parents always help each other with lifts.

We have one situation years ago where some in birthday party were staying for sleepover a s some weren't.... My child wasn't staying.

But sounds like the child is saying they would have loved a sleep over instead of a party.

It’s pointless inviting birthday boy as his mum told all guests that they were going straight off to relatives to stay there. She put something on the invite like, ‘we have a long journey after the party to stay with family so will need a prompt 3pm finish’

SO unreasonable of her to whinge about arrangements after 3pm!

Lunacy!

omg what an absolute nutter. I would ensure your son knows it was his friends mother who uninvited them both, take them both out for a really fun day out and plaster it all over social media. Also let the other mums know if you know them what has happened and say if any of their kids are uninvited then they’re welcome also! Watch them drop like flies and not attend the party. Yes not nice on birthday boy but psycho mother needs to be taught a lesson, she can deal with the fall out.

Oh I get it. Fair enough. Well you could reply and say that's a real shame for BB and also the 2 others and wish him a happy day.

Wow this is next level weird parenting but what can you do but keep on keeping on?

This woman does sound like a vindictive, entitled cow tbh. She’s already advised that they’re travelling some distance after the party to visit relatives and to single out your son and the nurses son is just plain nasty and small minded.
I hope your sone and the nurses son have a fabulous time whatever you plan for them………..and I hope they brag about to all their friends too.

This is completely mad. This happens frequently for both my children - lifts are being organised with friends and another parent might say ‘why doesn’t x come back to ours after I pick them up from the party?’. I usually remind them not to talk about it at the party so as not to make anyone else feel left out but it’s not a big deal.

O presume these chats while playing will mo longer happen either? (With party mums boy, not the other children)

She seems to be fishing for a reaction

I’d be inclined to say thanks for letting me know in advance, gives me time to plan something else for the boys, hope bb has a lovely day.

Avoids rising to the drama, indicates the boys will enjoy themselves regardless

Wow, I cant believe she uninvited you. Not replying is best, hope boys enjoy sleepover and are not too disappointed to miss party.

I feel sorry for birthday boy as his mum is doing him no favours, and obviously doesnt care about teaching to deal with not going to a sleepover that he was unavailable for anyway. A simple "B is going to A's for a sleepover as his mum is working. You have family party. You can have friends over for a sleepover another time"

Uninviting these 2 children is ridiculous and if she was so sensitive to never disappointing children she would not do this. She is basically only concerned with the rest of the world not disappointing her child which is very unrealistic.

I’ve disagreed with you on here but uninviting an 8 year old from a party is properly cuntish behaviour. Shame on her.

I’ve just gone with. ‘No problem, hope xxxx has a happy birthday.’ Baffling.

Wow!! That escalated. I’m a petty cow so I’d reply like “oh dear what a shame for your son, at least we can do something we enjoy for the afternoon now” 😂

Do you think she has seen this thread!

I kind of hope she has !

It's a control thing. She was in control when she was going to end the fun at 3pm by kicking everyone out. But the sleepover is in her eyes a fun thing that HER guests are going to but that isn't under her control.

Disinviting you is an attempt at regaining control.

What happens when she finds out that Bob and Tom are going to the cinema that evening, or John and Terry have a football match, or Cassies parents are babysitting for Xander? Are they all going to be disinvited?

Wow, yes. A good take. I should have picked up on the cuntiness by the ‘you all need to fuck off at 3 p.m.’. The guests will be allowed to stay and use the facilities of the venue until it closes… in addition to the soft play, there are parks and rides and animals to feed etc. how’s she going to feel when she finds out some have stayed past 3pm??

Also how on earth is she going to explain this to her son?? Assuming they are actually all friends??

Yeah they are friends. They aren’t a tight knit 3 or anything but they all get along. Trying to think of what to say to my son to minimise upset for him and birthday boy

Just blame the mother. No point lying. Im always pretty honest with my boys.

Wow she is unhinged! Never heard of anyone uninviting kids from a party before!
Consider it a lucky escape that you don't have to engage with her anymore, though I do feel sorry for her son.

what a twat - I would now organise something super special for your son so he will tell birthday boy your mum won't let me and X come to your party anymore as my mum was babysitting X that night as his mum has to work so we are going to X instead.