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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think infant circumcision is wrong but also that a total ban on it will not work and is not the most effective way to tackle it?

732 replies

Carla786 · 04/01/2026 00:49

On the recent threads after the tragic death of the baby boy who died from circumcision performed by a non medical professional, there have been a lot of calls for a total ban on here.
Now, I think infant circumcision is very wrong. But in practice I do not think a ban will work.
Most cultural circumcisions are performed by medically trained people. Backstreet ones need to be cracked down on with the full force of the law, but they are not typical.
Second, circumcision is key in Islam. However, while most agree it’s either compulsory or strongly recommended, age requirements are not as stringent in mandating someone has to be a minor. I think there is some hope sensitive campaigning within the community could maybe make more families consider leaving it until their son is at least maybe an older adolescent with more ability to choose.
Judaism – circumcision is central to Orthodox, Ultra Orthodox Haredi ofc, and more liberal Masorti and Reform. It is extremely unlikely that any law or external pressure would stop these practices, because brit milah is a covenantal obligation tied to Jewish identity. Attempting a blanket ban would likely trigger defensiveness, fear, maybe underground circumcisions and probably emigration of at least some to Israel or elsewhere, rather than protect children.
Focusing on sterile procedures, trained practitioners, and medical supervision would be more likely to significantly reduce risk. Jews have experienced persecution for circumcision in the past (e.g., Hellenistic bans and European restrictions), so any attempt to criminalise it today can feel existential. This is only heightened by the terrible upsurge in anti Semitism recently.

I agree with sentiments behind calling for a ban - I just thing measures short of a ban are more likely to work.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
11
GargoylesofBeelzebub · 04/01/2026 10:04

AddSomeKindness · 04/01/2026 08:04

I apologise if there was any confusion. Did you not see where I mentioned that a boy's foreskin typically doesn’t retract until around the age of 8? This can lead to a buildup of dirt and potentially result in infections. This information was shared with me by the surgeon who performed the minor procedure on our sons.

You actually believe that?!! 🙄

that vast vast majority of males in the UK are not circumcised and manage to wash themselves properly. You realise you’re taking to women who have sons, husbands. and other male family and friends who are not circumcised right? Any issues are very very rare and do not justify routine circumcision for non medical reasons.

IDontHateRainbows · 04/01/2026 10:08

Nevermind17 · 04/01/2026 06:39

Genital mutilation must surely fall under the ‘child sex abuse’ umbrella. I can’t see how it couldn’t.

It's not being done for the sexual pleasure of the perpetrator.

Or if pleasure isn't the right word, gratification, or whatever.

TheignT · 04/01/2026 10:12

Well the ban (law) isn't working about killing people, raping people, assaulting people so let's just legalise it all. No law to break no problem. Unless you're the victim of course

TheignT · 04/01/2026 10:13

IDontHateRainbows · 04/01/2026 10:08

It's not being done for the sexual pleasure of the perpetrator.

Or if pleasure isn't the right word, gratification, or whatever.

There are two people involved, the perpetrator might not get any pleasure or satisfaction but what about the victim?

Hoardasurass · 04/01/2026 10:15

AmpleMintBalonz · 04/01/2026 09:20

That assumes that there are a lot of parents still taking their children abroad for FGM rather than the law helping to reduce the practice hence very few people being caught doing it. If everyone who have or might circumcise their sons was put through safeguarding measures like they are for FGM, maybe the practice would reduce too.

If people want to emigrate just to do it, and other countries permit the practice, maybe we should let them go there.

There was a report give to the Scottish Parliament recently that found 1200 cases of fmg had been discovered over the last decade in Scotland (it didn't specify how many happened here and how many were done abroad either before arrival in the UK or the victims being taken abroad for it).
1200 girls/women over a decade is not a small number thats on average 120 a year or 10 per month in a population of 5.5 million men and women. Not all of those girls/women will be immigrants and this is a big problem amongst certain communities with shame and ostracised by the communities of the family if its not done and presure on the victims not to speak out from the family and communities, as such its an extremely under reported crime that often only comes to light when there's complications or due to pregnancy and labour.

Justlostmybagel · 04/01/2026 10:17

Itsmetheflamingo · 04/01/2026 09:47

You are posting this with an air of powerful influential Jews interfering.

the other side is Jews take their religion so seriously that they know they cannnot practice in a country that outlaws MGM.

they would have to flee, which as you know, the Jews have quite a history of being forced to do.

I don't know if you can really call that "fleeing"

TheignT · 04/01/2026 10:19

SapphOhNo · 04/01/2026 10:00

This argument collapses the moment you remove cultural defensiveness and look at the ethics.

How common circumcision is does not matter. Popularity does not make an irreversible bodily alteration ethical, especially when it is done to someone who cannot consent.

The claim that it has “very few downsides” is simply untrue. It removes healthy functional tissue, permanently alters the body, and sometimes causes complications. The fact that many men are fine with it does not cancel out the fact that some are not and were never given a choice.

Saying it is easier on a baby is not a justification. It is the core problem. Babies cannot refuse.

The “he might regret not being circumcised” argument is logically broken. If he grows up and wants it, he can choose it. If you do it to him as a baby and he does not want it, the harm is irreversible.

This is not about British snobbery or looking down on other cultures. It is about a child’s right to bodily integrity. Culture does not override consent.

I thought the royal family traditionally circumcised their sons, might have changed. If it happens in the RF I think we can safely rule out snobbery.

AmpleMintBalonz · 04/01/2026 10:19

Hoardasurass · 04/01/2026 10:15

There was a report give to the Scottish Parliament recently that found 1200 cases of fmg had been discovered over the last decade in Scotland (it didn't specify how many happened here and how many were done abroad either before arrival in the UK or the victims being taken abroad for it).
1200 girls/women over a decade is not a small number thats on average 120 a year or 10 per month in a population of 5.5 million men and women. Not all of those girls/women will be immigrants and this is a big problem amongst certain communities with shame and ostracised by the communities of the family if its not done and presure on the victims not to speak out from the family and communities, as such its an extremely under reported crime that often only comes to light when there's complications or due to pregnancy and labour.

That figure is useless unless you know where those women and girls were resident at the time of the procedure. More importantly, all of those 1200 women and girls will now be subject to safeguarding measures of their siblings and children. Identifying them is part of the safeguarding procedure so this is showing what I am proposing in action.
ID women and girls who have had it --> protect young and unborn women and girls who are at risk of it.

somanychristmaslights · 04/01/2026 10:22

Carla786 · 04/01/2026 01:02

It is unfortunate the Jewish scriptures are very strict on this...

Unluckily, the Jewish scriptures explicitly say it must be done as an 8-day-old baby. This will be hard to get around, at least for branches who adhere very strictly to the text.

'And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every male throughout your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any foreigner, that is not of thy seed. He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised; and My covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant. And the uncircumcised male who is not circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken My covenant.

— Genesis 17:10–14[25]
Leviticus 12:3 says: "And in the eighth day the flesh of his foreskin shall be circumcised.

However, people won't just be able to change that. Gradual reform strictly mandating medical oversight is much more hopeful.

Quotes like that make me so cross about religion. It doesn’t say why - why is a foreskin bad? And if that was the case, surely evolution would have changed it?

Hoardasurass · 04/01/2026 10:22

sabababa · 04/01/2026 09:32

Nearly 40% of males worldwide are circumcised. The vast majority of them are perfectly happy with their lot since unlike fgm its performed for different reasons and has very few downsides and even some health benefits.
Circumcising a baby is a much easier operation than an adult. Therefore parents do need to make that call with the child's best interest as for any other decision. A boy could just as easily grow up and regret not having been circumcised as a baby as one who might regret it
The fact that people on mumsnet think they know best than nearly half the world's male population is really quite mind boggling. I suppose its because it's not a British thing to do. You're not better than those billions (literally) of parents who have decided to circumcise their sons even if they are mostly African, Muslim or Jewish

The boy/man who regrets not being circumcised can get it done as an adult.
The boy/man who regrets having been circumcised cant have it undone forskins dont grow back.
If its not medically necessary then it shouldn't be done until the male is old enough to decide for themselves

AmpleMintBalonz · 04/01/2026 10:24

somanychristmaslights · 04/01/2026 10:22

Quotes like that make me so cross about religion. It doesn’t say why - why is a foreskin bad? And if that was the case, surely evolution would have changed it?

It is to symbolise cutting away sin IIRC. Later on Paul said we can just do it in our minds instead.

TheignT · 04/01/2026 10:24

Hoardasurass · 04/01/2026 10:15

There was a report give to the Scottish Parliament recently that found 1200 cases of fmg had been discovered over the last decade in Scotland (it didn't specify how many happened here and how many were done abroad either before arrival in the UK or the victims being taken abroad for it).
1200 girls/women over a decade is not a small number thats on average 120 a year or 10 per month in a population of 5.5 million men and women. Not all of those girls/women will be immigrants and this is a big problem amongst certain communities with shame and ostracised by the communities of the family if its not done and presure on the victims not to speak out from the family and communities, as such its an extremely under reported crime that often only comes to light when there's complications or due to pregnancy and labour.

Were the 1200 recent victims? There would be a big difference if 1200 young girls suffered FGM in the last decade than If the 1200 included females of all ages and some suffered FGM 20, 30, 40 or more years ago it tells us much less about what is currently Happening.

MyCatStoleSausages · 04/01/2026 10:26

Even bans on non medical professionals carrying out male circumcisions aren't adhered to and are compared to Nazi Germany by the likes of the European Jewish Association so I wouldn't hold my breath that a total ban would work.

AmpleMintBalonz · 04/01/2026 10:27

MyCatStoleSausages · 04/01/2026 10:26

Even bans on non medical professionals carrying out male circumcisions aren't adhered to and are compared to Nazi Germany by the likes of the European Jewish Association so I wouldn't hold my breath that a total ban would work.

Do you have a source for this?

miamo12 · 04/01/2026 10:28

Don’t care what ancient writings say, it’s the 21st century and should be banned. There’s plenty of things we thought was ok in the past now banned. Pretty sure there would be agreement across Europe on this topic too. What adults (18+) choose to do is there choice we shouldn’t be mutilating minors

ThreeSixtyTwo · 04/01/2026 10:29

The religion needs to be more flexible and adapt for 21st century. There is no medical advantage in routine circumcision in current Europe, so the Imans and Rabbis must find a way to explain it in their religion.

If they can't do that, they are not WORIADS.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 04/01/2026 10:29

'And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every male throughout your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any foreigner, that is not of thy seed. He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised; and My covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant. And the uncircumcised male who is not circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken My covenant.
Even more of a reason to ban such barbarous acts on young babies.
That is disturbing.

Mischance · 04/01/2026 10:31

British law should not sanction child mutilation.

Religion is no justification and is irrelevant.

Bestchocolate · 04/01/2026 10:32

Op I half agree with your pragmatic approach

My heart without a doubt says ban outright

Adults can consent to have it done.

However as you say the reality is that unethical back street places will simply thrive putting these children in even more risk and danger.
If they get damaged parents would be less likely to seek help for fear of punishment .

And yes many will simply get done abroad.

The problem is how to out educate two religions that are drilled in from birth ? Islam says you are born islamic ? Not sure about Judaism ?how can you educate around that ?

PennyLaneisinmyheartandmysoul · 04/01/2026 10:34

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AmpleMintBalonz · 04/01/2026 10:34

Bestchocolate · 04/01/2026 10:32

Op I half agree with your pragmatic approach

My heart without a doubt says ban outright

Adults can consent to have it done.

However as you say the reality is that unethical back street places will simply thrive putting these children in even more risk and danger.
If they get damaged parents would be less likely to seek help for fear of punishment .

And yes many will simply get done abroad.

The problem is how to out educate two religions that are drilled in from birth ? Islam says you are born islamic ? Not sure about Judaism ?how can you educate around that ?

As part of FGM safeguarding, you can confiscate the child's passport or take them into care if you feel they are still at risk.

Bestchocolate · 04/01/2026 10:38

@Bushmillsbabe the thing is asking for it to be done legally in regulated places is then agreeing it's ok to change your babies physique and take something away, which, I think is hugely ethically problematic.

Bestchocolate · 04/01/2026 10:39

@AmpleMintBalonz how. Who knows they are at risk ?

MyCatStoleSausages · 04/01/2026 10:41

AmpleMintBalonz · 04/01/2026 10:27

Do you have a source for this?

There was a highly publicised case where a British Rabbi came to Ireland to cut some babies, he was arrested scalpel in hand after cutting one, ready to cut another. The rabbi was arrested because in Ireland only trained medical professionals can carry out male circumcisions in sterile, clinical environments with the correct anesthetic. It caused uproar and the European Jewish Association claimed that the Irish legal system is now second to Nazi Germany and that circumcision is a commandment not a crime.

www.eureporter.co/lifestyle/religion/2024/08/02/for-the-first-time-since-the-nazis-rabbi-arrested-for-performing-a-circumcision-in-ireland/

aquaaerobicschaos · 04/01/2026 10:41

VanillaImpulse · 04/01/2026 09:12

Who actually performs these operations as I sincerely hope the NHS is not being used for these mutilations?

Sadly I don’t see it being banned as cousin marriage was up for debate and they decided to keep that to not offend certain groups even though the level of disability from the resulting offspring is extremely high.

Some NHS boards in Scotland , I don't know if all, certainly perform it for religious reasons on baby boys over 6 months.

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