Tell me your positive experiences on dating apps. I'm beginning to thinks it's all a con!

[RoseWineLover]

I'm on 2 dating apps and feeling absolutely deflated! I like guys, I message guys and I get nothing back!
I always reply to guys who message me saying thanks but no thanks. I think its rude not to acknowledge them when someone has reached out to you. I've been blocked (what an over the top reaction that was after one message!) and ignored numerous times! It's absolutely brutal out there! Is it worth continuing? If you've been OLD how long did you do it for before you called it a day? And if you were successful, HOW??

I met mine start of 2024. I think the problem is if you want long term success stories if you have met someone in the last 3 years do you really count yet as a long-term success story? There arent many examples purely because we cant count as long-term- not because we werent successful

My friends who did OLD pre Covid say it was much better back then.

Since lockdown it seems like a lot of people are on there through boredom and validation rather than genuine intent.

I met my lovely wife on the internet

I think for me it was perfect because the reality is that if someone approached me at a bar I would run for the hills.

I have three friends who met people on dating apps and are now married. They made it clear that they were looking for a serious relationship I think.

A lot of men put things in their profile to get matches - not necessarily because it’s true.

I did it back in 2009 and it was so good - I was the one not taking it seriously. Almost 20 years later it’s terrible now.

@FeistyFrankie

I recently logged back in, hoping to try again, but it's all the same - guys just wanting sex, guys who aren't sure what they want, guys who are poly and partnered, guys with a chip on their shoulder... and every so often, a rare and genuinely lovely guy - who I have zero chemistry with and, despite going on numerous dates to see if a spark/attraction grows, nothing develops.

Ha ha - SNAP! Mirrors my experience on and off OLD.
Mainly men looking for sex or to cheat and the rare time they seem serious and nice I just rarely fancy them and never develop any feelings for them.

It is lame but sadly that's how a lot of men seem to respond to hair!

I met my husband via online dating, although it was 10 years ago now. I also never used the paid sites, only the free ones.

I must admit , I nearly gave up after a few months after thinking it was a waste of time , but a friend encouraged me to stick it out for abit. Give it time, and maybe try one of the free ones too.

I joined tinder in September to try and meet people to date post divorce. My expectations are pretty low, I don’t want a coparent for my children or someone to share household bills. I got over invested in someone early doors and that taught me a lot. Happy just to chat/date/enjoy the attention suppose if I was looking for something more meaningful, I might be disappointed.

Well I had a message tonight from someone who said we chatted briefly in December I can’t remember, anyway he proceeded to tell me he stopped chatting with me as he got talking to someone else but that didn’t work out, so he thought he would try chatting to me again! Ummm I don’t think so.

I definitely had this happen at least once. Just shows again how daft most men are...

I was using OLD for about 6 months, after 29 years married. Was pretty naive going into it. Shocked by pervs and weirdos!! Went on a few dates. Dated a few blokes for a month max. Lots of chatting with prospectives. And I've been seeing my BF for a year. I set my radius at 30 miles, as I didn't want to date anyone in my home town - where everyone knows everyone.
I travel quite a lot and liked the control of having things at a distance for privacy.
I learned a lot from OLD, about modern dating, men (and why they are single!!), and what I thought I wanted and was prepared to accept.
As I said, I was pretty naive having last been on a date 29 years ago! I think my mental dating age was stuck in my early 20s. The advice I'd give (that I didn't follow myself) is to protect your own feelings. You're already awesome, so don't let OLD affect your confidence. Choose to be with someone, don't panic about being on your own. And limerance is a bugger.

HI @RoseWineLover Sorry you're having such a disappointing time, certainly OLD can be brutal.
Personally I had a positive experience with OLD. I mainly used Bumble which I liked because as a women i controlled who I contacted and when. I didn't bother with the paid version - just signed on for free so I couldn't see how many "swipes" I'd had.
I enjoyed meeting a few guys - all people I would never have met in my day to day life.
After about 9 months (on and off) I met a wonderful guy who I've now been with 5 years - honestly think he's my soul mate and I never would of met him if it weren't for OLD.

Keep going just try to have a positive view of it all - laugh at the nut jobs - stay safe obviously when meeting guys but just try to view it as meeting people that you normally wouldn't come across. January is usually a peek in people new signing up for OLD - so perhaps have a check of your profile - give it a refresh and then try again maybe next week - you might find there's a fresh load of profiles out there. Good Luck.

Edited to add that I have short hair too - so hair length definitely shouldn't be a blocker for you :)

My partner and I met on Hinge and are deleriously happy.

Use good quality sites, make sure your profile is an honest representation of who you are, and be very selective.

Good luck!

I met my DH on Plenty of Fish, just over 17 years ago. I think you have to throw a lot of time at it. I was on POF every night for hours. After 8 weeks, I met DH.

I have fabulous single friends who have had no luck - but they openly admit that they can take weeks to respond to messages, so they're not really putting in the hours.

My son met his partner of 4 years on Tinder. They recently broke up, and it only took him a few months to connect with his current girlfriend.

I met my husband online - late 30s/early 40s.

Its a game I tell you! One thing that I found helpful with minset and content for profile was Evan Marc Katz. You don't need to pay for content - he has loads of good blogs and videos.

Also, I've now come across 'burned haystack'...and wish I new about it when I was dating. it would have saved me a load of time and helped dodgy early red flags and weed out genuine guys with healthy attitutes. Worth a google and her insta page is great.

Unfortunately it works both ways so I understand how you feel. As a man, I have had 3 matches within the last month. Each match messaged once, I replied, and for each one i never got a reply.

I know life sometimes catches up with people and they're not always on the app, but when it becomes a consistent thing it starts to make me feel like they're only on the app for gratification and attention.

Match,com, Tinder, OK Cupid AND Plenty of Fish is owned by Match Group.

I met my other half on pof in 2019, we're marrying this year. It was pot luck, there was a banner of faces along the top of the page, he just looked nice. It really just feels like luck. I had met loads of bad'ns before him. It did take a while. I sincerely hope you have that lucky match/ break.

Met my OH on Bumble in 2018 and right now I’m typing one handed while nursing our newborn so OLD gets my vote! Top tips for me are to consider widening your “type” and search distance - if I hadn’t we’d never have matched. Second tip is to meet ASAP to find out if you have chemistry in person. Previous attempts at OLD led me to get frustrated at long convos back and forth and then either it would go nowhere or we’d meet and it just felt off. We met after 4 days and hit it off immediately.

I thinking about dipping my toe in bit after a dreadful expedience with dh and drinking but I’m very wary

would love to try speed dating

and yes needs ideally to be within 30mins drive

def don’t want local town as all knobs😂 but also don’t went to bump into them if didn’t wok out