AIBU to think we can’t profoundly change ourselves after middle age?

[wildfellhall]

Or to think it is impossible for most of us to really change our behaviour in later life ? And how do those who do so pull it off?

@FiveMetresUp - would he take on any more apprentices?

Just asking for a reasonably 59y old friend… 😉

This came in my news feed this morning. I thought you might like to read it.

www.bbc.com/future/article/20260102-how-i-changed-my-personality-in-six-weeks

We can't change our fundamental personalities but we can change our behaviour - a very different thing.

Thank you! This is interesting!

I’ve often thought about this. That people either become better or worse as they get older. In terms of personality I mean. You can either expand and become wiser/more grounded or you contract and your flaws become more pronounced. Yes you might make the people around you suffer but ultimately you yourself will suffer the most if you don’t grow as a person. This thought has spurred me on many a time to become a better human being!

I don't think it's either or, I think both can happen at the same time.

For example, the lack of sensory gating of noises that set off my misophonia has markedly increased to the point where I noticeably flinch when a dog barks or a child screams in a cafe, while I have, through necessity, increased my patience hugely through mixing in an age group of declining physical and mental ability.

The parent/owner of the child/dog would perceive me as worse and my friends and acquaintances would experience me as better.

It's definitely possible to decide to change a lot of things, though.