To think my DD should go to Edinburgh Uni instead of Kent?

[Girlypops154]

My DD has been accepted to Edinburgh to study Astrophysics and she has also been accepted to Kent University. We live outside of London and she says wants to be closer to home but I say she should go to Scotland because it’s a better university (she has also been accepted to St Andrews but we prefer Edinburgh). We are in a blessed position that we can afford the extra year up there. How do I get to change her mind as she has her mind now set on Kent but I really think going to an RG would be far better. She’s now getting annoyed at me because I keep insisting on Edinburgh. She has also been accepted to Durham and Aberystwyth but neither of them have got back to us yet. Any advice or am I being unreasonable? Thank you.

Well.... as this is anonymous.... I'm one of the current staff members on Court, where all of the financial decisions are ratified. I'm also on the union exec., and hold a PG qualification in finance. So, I probably have knowledge that not many people will have.
Yes, there are areas which could do with some large-scale restructure, but the approach being taken is a pretty blunt instrument. I have been through this before, at another institution. Within 2-3 years, more than half of the decisions on closures/restructures were being reversed. For example, doing away with the Centre for Academic Practice as one of the first cuts, seems particularly perverse.

Anyway... I would caution folks to find out as much as they can about plans in potential areas of study. None of us are really sure about how the institution will look in 2-3 years. If many of us are left. 😞

Four different unis in Edinburgh - Edinburgh, Napier, Heriot Watt & Queen Margaret. All different, independent institutions (for now.)

Would she be willing to take a gap year and apply to the better ranked london universities like UCL or Imperial? Kent is in a completely different league to edinburgh!

@Eepers Oh how bitchy!

@Blasterplaster i think your children are doing really well for themselves!

A First????
No pressure there then!

This is a form of blackmail. If you are in a position to fund your kids uni fees and living expenses, then they are left with no choice but to meet your request. If they don't, they can't do the degree.

That's okay though. Because it's the parent's money and should expect to see it used wisely

No it isn’t, don’t be daft. My kids could get jobs and loans like plenty of others do. Like I did in fact. As it happens, they live the life of riley and don’t have to consider the cost of their education, housing, clothing, food, etc at all. Quite a charmed life and very far from blackmail.

Thankfully what they want to do actually aligns with what I’m willing to pay for. But yes, had they come up with some nonsense idea about what they wanted to study and where, then they would have had to figure out how to pay for it.

Grade inflation is massive these days. Typically 1/3rd of a course get a 1st.

@Peridoteage For this subject, UCL and Imperial are not better ranked! Durham and St Andrews are higher. Manchester is 4th and obviously easy to get to. For such a scientific subject where research is everything, being where research is top notch matters. DD needs to think what she’s going to do after her degree too because, if it’s research or work, what will this look like and where?

I moved from Kent to study at Edinburgh. It's not just the 3° (the average may be more, especially with wind chill factored in) but the long dark winters too. Edinburgh can be very snobbish, & there is a town vs gown feel. Its a living nightmare to get accom, Y2 onwards. Plus Scotland goes to the polls again in May & a SNP win will be a mandate for another IndyRef (according to Swinney this morning).
Some things gs to bear in mind, other than the course itself.

I'd not try and persuade her but I would try a d find some evidence regarding RG/Edinburgh graduates' success (jobs and salaries) so she can compare with her chosen Uni. You've to guide them but let them make their own choices.

My friends daughter went to Durham on the basis that it was prestigious, RG etc. She struggled to settle and make friends, the pastoral and tutot support was awful and she hated it. Being far from home only made it worse. She restarted at a closer to home, non RG uni where she is doing great.

This has to be your daughters decision. Beyond discussing the pros and cons, it should be 100% up to her. Even if she thought she was happy to move a long way from home initally, the reality of it as it gets closer might mean she has changed her mind and that is ok. You also get a feel for places. Some just feel like a good fit and there is a lot to be said for that regardless of league tables and reputation.

I agree with this completely.

Above all it is important that she should settle and be happy or no learning will happen and you will have a sad DD on your hands.

She is more likely to settle somewhere that she has chosen herself.

I am a great believer-from experience-in not going to a really close university, but not too far either. Dd went to Edinburgh from the SE and while she did well and eventually had a good time, she got into bad trouble at one point and needed us. It would have been so much better if she hadn’t been a day’s journey away.

@Scarlettpixie She might not have appreciated the difference between school and university. University is about independence and many dc thrive at Durham and it has a low drop out rate. Many find it wonderful. Expectations have to be realistic though,

It’s her life and the course and university she has to live at for the next few years. Not your choice.

@WhyamIinahandcartandwherearewegoing She put the universities on the form and isn’t paying for herself. What after university? More subsidy from parents? They should be considered and have views respected.

Also what decent parent stands by when the quality of the courses varies so much? Parents have much more experience than a 17 year old 6th former. It’s their duty to talk about such an important decision. Why let the DD make a possible big mistake regarding employability and future career? This decision matters well beyond staying with school mates who aren’t looking into the future.

Either sub them and let them make their own choices or don’t sub them - you have a choice.

BTW things have moved on somewhat since you perhaps had your student experience, the graduate jobs market is on its arse and Russell Group doesn’t have the cachet it did back in the day.

Support not interference.

It's up to you if you contribute or not, but you don't control where they are going to be spending the next 3-5 years. Accompany them on open days, give them all the information to enable them to make an informed choice, then respect their decision.

(Like another poster, I want to echo that Durham was great for DD until it wasn't: the pastoral side was indefensible.)

To be fair, and I do think if she’s Durham-offer material she should aim elsewhere than Kent, the reality is that the grad job market is tough at the moment (maybe it’ll be easier in a few years?) - but it’s tough for all (and maybe someone wants to have a peek at Durham’s finances before castigating everyone else), and she’s planning a Physics degree and they are sought after. Kent isn’t so poor as to not enable PG or PhD level study, or to be blacklisted by employers.

Theres a lot of hyberbole on the thread (it is MN after all!), but a Physics degree from a middling uni isn’t going to ruin this kid’s life chances at all. Employers like Physics and Maths grads, wherever they’re from.

To add - all the evidence points to AL grades being the stronger factor, not uni or degree classification, in determining post-uni outcomes.

I would find it hard not to see my DC go to a RG Uni if that was an option. But, you can’t force them. You can clearly state why Edinburgh is the better uni - provide stats to show your reasoning for this choice. But, ultimately it has to be their decision.

@titchy In this field, where further research is normal, degree will matter! It’s astrophysics not maths. It’s a fairly small number of dc who do this and employment isn’t obvious afterwards. A levels won’t be a determine factor here I think.