Cafes should have 2 lines...

[Mysterian]

...one for people like me who want sensible drinks like a cup of tea, and one for those who want freaky complicated things requiring bizarre steampunk looking machinery that take as much as 45 minutes to prepare. Take your order for a wombat milk frappy-mocha foam with cream and splash of smugness syrup and get out my way.
2 lines. One with a sign saying "Normal" above it and one saying "Can't Understand Normal Tea Stuff" overhead.
I sometimes have a hot chocolate, but without the la-di-da stuff like cream and chocolate powder. Like John Wayne or Jesus would have had.

Yes.

I don't like coffee and hot chocolate is a bit rich for a casual drink so I'm left with a plain old cup of tea. Usually takes 3 days to get my boiled water on a tea bag so I have to agree 😆.

Why are we calling them lines? They're queues

Like I said above... people who want to chat to their friends in a cafe and like to drink tea while doing so 😄

Absolutely get you OP.

Also if there's a massive queue and we've all waited 20 minutes to get to the till, to then when asked what you want, spend bloody ages deciding! And asking people with you what they want! You've just had 20 fucking minutes to ask Auntie Joan what she wants and for you all to decide - what have you been doing! 😩

I like a nice pot of tea in a cafe, but then I don’t go to cafes often because I prefer the coffee the way I make it at home (cafetière, strong and black) and can’t see the point of paying someone to make inferior coffee, we drink in cafes a distance from home, not in local town

I would have held your cardi 😊

Oh no, someone’s not as funny as they think they are

The people who go into our M&S on the exit side of the door and get pissed off when you express your exasperation when they’re blocking your way out. Just keep left ffs, it’s not hard to

Some sandwiches/drinks go better with tea imo but regardless, surely the idea of people ordering anything more elaborate than a black coffee stopped being funny or remarkable in about 1998?

That sounds like me on the first (and only) time I went into a Subway

Also, people who need to find their purse/bus pass at the bottom of their bags/in one of 100 pockets should not be allowed to get on the bus.

How hard is it to have it ready in your hand at the bus stop?

45 minutes? To make a caramel latte? Yes I do see where you’re coming from. One pump of syrup usually does add another ten minutes on.

You might need to be more specific?

Tea drinker here and totally agree- people fannying about forever with fancy coffee, while I just want a nice pot of tea (not a teabag in a mug) and a cake drive me insane. And the noise the stupid coffee machines make is deafening!

Assistance is usually available for disabled people. First time flyers are otherwise able to read signs and listen to announcements.

As an NHS worker I would like a separate line for staff so I don’t have to spend 20 minutes of my break queuing.

Oh and I drink tea, because I don’t like coffee.

Totally agree. In fact everywhere - one line for me and one for everyone else.
Perfect.

This is probably my main criteria for choosing a supermarket (currently my local Lidl is best). Went in Tesco yesterday for a couple of things, a fiasco. Just would not use regularly. That said, some of it is down to management.

THIS!!! Staff don't seem to understand that they could actually do more than one thing at a time. They literally just stand there looking at something happening slowly rather than think what else they could be doing whilst waiting. Just no concept at all of "Multi tasking".

I very nearly lost it at a fast food outlet once. I only wanted a portion of chips. There was a huge stack of chips in the "heated" dispenser. Apparently everyone in front of me were waiting for drinks and/or burgers etc as literally nothing was happening. Several staff stood around behind the counter looking at the cooking area and looking at the guy on the drinks machine clearly waiting for things. I waited a while whilst people in front were being served very slowly, and eventually I got fed up and got the attention of one of them and asked if they could just get my bag of fries - she looked as if I'd asked her to sacrifice her first born and told me I'd have to wait in line! When I asked why she couldn't just pick up the fries and hand them to me, she couldn't actually explain why. It just clearly never occurred to her to serve what they could serve whilst waiting for everything else! It wasn't as if they were busy nor that by "jumping the queue" I'd make others wait longer. Anyway, the fries were going cold and soggy whilst I waited looking at them! Eventually with the usual huffing and puffing and eye rolling, she handed them to me!

….. and the old couples (I’m old myself) who have to place every item on the supermarket belt very carefully into their trolley in a specific place. It seems to take two,people longer than I do by myself. After this they look around wildly for their card or cash as if they’ve never been in a supermarket.

while I’m moaning, why is it that service in every National Trust cafe is so slow ….huge queues with people waiting for hot meals while most people were holding cold food but waiting for hot drinks.

That tickled me as well.

I'm going to be nicking that line, OP. Hope you don't mind! 😂😂

I married one of these people. In spite of my having the same order 99% of the time he will drop out of the queue to nip and ask me a question.

I'm just back from lunch with him after a supermarket trip.

"Hmm, olives. Should we put out olives? Maybe the nuts are enough. No, let's get extra of both to be sure. Let's go back. Is there champagne? No. Yes. Wait, let me check if there's special champagne in the Christmas aisle."

Toddler was screamingly overtired by the time we'd dealt with that AND the lunch dithering.

A separate escalator for people who need to stand still for an hour and a half when they get to the top/bottom deciding on their next move. Right in the middle, without moving to the side. Meanwhile the escalator is delivering a steady stream of people who need somewhere to step as they get off...

Voted YABU as even a simple coffee takes forever, while I just want to pay for my Diet Coke and be done with it (and agree with whoever asked what all these “lines” are - surely we queue here).