New puppy...

[Doggynono]

I am not a dog person never have been...DP loves dogs all four kids love dogs. I am allergic to dogs some I can tolerate. Anyway they all went on and on DP told me for the kids childhood we should get them a dog I caved. He promised he would do everything with the dog. We got a 'hypoallergenic' breed I went and visited without taking antihistamine twice and all was fine. Anyway we're a week into having the new puppy and my allergies are flaring up. I just feel crap with them sore eyes, sneezing, a little bit wheezing thankfully no rashes. I'm trying not to be round her too much as I feel miserable have been taking 2 antihistamines a day but they aren't doing much. DP is raging at me he keeps throwing me dirty looks when I sneeze so there is no way I can say about Rehoming. He's also huffing about having to sleep downstairs with the dog while we crate train but again he was the one who wanted the dog not me. Plus I don't want to do that on the kids and dog.

any tips on what I can do here? Do hepa air purifiers work? I hoover, mop and damp wipe every day and she isn't allowed upstairs

OP, I think it's obvious what you need to do here.

Rehome the husband.

That'll be a challenge, but could happen.

You'll be lucky. Have you not heard? Husband rescue centres are bursting at the seams. Especially now, after Christmas.

They do offer consultations and yes we had a consultation with the seller, who is a qualified naturopath, before purchasing. Appreciate the lecture, though 👍

Why does he get to make the rules? Tough, he's the one that needs to explain to the kids. And is he going to walk it, take it to puppy classes, clear up the garden??? Does he work from home? I imagine there is more to come. Put 100% of the burden on him.

You have two problems here, a dog allergy issue and a controlling arsehole of a partner. As a huge animal lover I’ll say your partner is the bigger issue of the two, without minimising the allergy in the slightest. It sounds as though you’re willing to try whatever is needed to keep the dog but that you’re afraid of pissing off your partner. Why did he get a dog for Christmas? They are living creatures, not toys or gifts for kids 🤦🏻‍♀️

Definitely try using an air purifier, maybe a non drowsy antihistamine could help massively. Outside of all this, are you prepared to look after the dog if needed? Your partner doesn’t sound as though he has thought this out properly nor can be relied upon to care for the dog properly once the novelty has worn off. Many women find themselves tasked with responsibilities for pets on top of everything else for this very reason. Regardless, get your child involved in the day to day care of the dog so he grows up with a better sense of duty than his arsehole father. Sorry you’ve been put in this position.

dog has to go. Honestly please don’t risk your health. We had a pup, dh started with allergy symptoms, 7 months in he had a massive asthma attack. Dog had to go. It was devastating but allergies aren’t to be messed with.

Rehome the husband.
If you don't want to do that then at least crate train him.

I was going to say the allergies might calm down. DH is allergic to dogs (red streaming eyes, sneezing constantly etc) and we have a labrador. The dog stays downstairs so theors a dog free zone, he's mainly fine with him apart from if he gives him a good belly rub, sits on the sofa with him for too long or if we've been on holiday and away from him for a week or 2. If he goes into a house with a different dog he's still allergic though 🤷‍♀️
Your husband shouldn't be moaning that he has to sleep with the puppy, he wanted it, did he not see this sort of thing happening until it settled??

Yeah he wants to keep the dog but doesn’t want to do the work. Never ever ever beleivd people when part of their negotiations is that they walk the dog, clean up after the dog etc etc. it is always bullshit

And now your health is at risk.

owner of two standard poodles pure bred. we owned two prior to these monsters. They have hair instead of fur as all sizes of poodles do. However you can still be allergic to their licks.. do not let any dog lick you if you have allergies. Also, your dog is a crossbreed, no guarantee of the poodle genes. I feel for you.

This is quite confusing.
You've held strong for years and you have 4 kids (joint kids?) but you have such separate finances that you have to pay him back if you turn out to be allergic to the thing you both knew you were allergic to, that you didn't want, but he pressured you for years to live with.

Honestly, LTB. You cannot live the next somethingteen years in a house full of your allergen. He won't even change out of his allergen covered clothes when he shares a bed with you.

It is you or the dog. It has to be. You cannot live like this and it sounds like he doesn't care at all.

No need for me to google that thank you - just picked up my fostair so am aware. Still think a talk with the GP about meds is in order if she wants to keep the dog.

OP hasn’t mentioned being asthmatic…so unless that’s diagnosed by a GP and she hasn’t mentioned it then it’s not an issue.

Could you keep the dog contained to one room. Then perhaps have wipeble flooring and washable covers for any furnishings?

Plus an air purifier in there.

Rules about no clothing to enter your bedroom if worn near dog?

Is their anyway you can have some sort of garden room /log cabin in garden which can be dogs in order to reduce time spent in the actual home ?

Hey OP, there's a chance that your allergies may settle with your own dog. I wish you well xx

I am allergic to cats and dogs and have always had cats. I find that if I spend a month or two without any (when one has died and we havent yet got another) the allergies come back for the first few months with a new cat but it tapers off slowly. Also find other peoples cats bother me even now. Wiping them down daily with a wet towel can help, air purifiers in your bedroom and keeping them to certain rooms such as downstairs only.

Sounds about right. This is usually the case. Don’t get a pet if you don’t want it as ultimately mum is the main caregiver 🤷🏻‍♀️

Agreed, my dog is 15 1/2 and going strong still

My husband is allergic to cats and we had two for 20 years.

he took anti histamine when his allergies flared up and would take two at a time. The Dr said this was ok. Then he would get used them and it would be ok. So it mainly happened when we had been on holiday and then came home again. It was his choice to get them. He did see the dr and they said it’s the cats or the wife or you just put up with it. 🤣

Tell him to get stuffed. He forced the dog on you, it was all him. I would seriously say the dog needs rehomed. You can’t live like that for years to come.

I hope your allergies get better in time, mine did. I was okay with our family dog until I moved out. Then when I’d visit and fuss him I’m be itchy, watery eyes etc, I’d lost my tolerance to him by not living with him.
had the same with guinea pigs and rabbits. Other peoples I wheeze, get a rash, watery eyes etc but I’ve owned rabbits and guineas in the past and survived without being allergic ridden daily (presumably I was in the beginning but developed a tolerance)

I have asthma, I have various triggers, including allergies, but also just plain, straight-up asthma, triggered by god knows what.

As I said previously, I live with 2 cats I am allergic to. If OP does have asthma, all she needs to do is ensure she is careful with her medication, i.e., keep a backup reliever in case her original runs out unexpectedly, and make sure she takes her preventative religiously.

Asthma can kill, but the cause of that is rarely an allergic reaction, which is fortunate for people like me who are also allergic to things less easy to avoid, such as house dust and grass pollen.

Unfortunately the problem is with your partner and he’s the one that needs rehoming, I’d be getting shot now and telling him to take his dog with him!