Page 9 | I just wish people would stop sending me Christmas cards

LibertyLily · 20/12/2025 22:14

Namechange2211 · 20/12/2025 19:54

I moved house 2 years ago and no one asked for my new address. I’m guessing i won’t get any except from my kids. Maybe that’s an idea for you?

Didn't you send out change of address cards (yep, heaven forbid, more cards lol!) @Namechange2211 or emails/texts/whatever notifying people you'd moved?

We've moved house five times in the past eighteen years and have always let friends/family know our new address. These moves have been across the UK, often a couple of hundred miles or more. As a result we've made some new friends, most of whom it's not practical logistically to see from one year to the next and many of whom don't do WhatsApp or faceache (I don't do the latter either).

Also, we both have (only a handful now, sadly) elderly relatives who also live much too far for us to visit regularly. They seem to really appreciate the thought and care that goes into choosing, writing and sending Christmas cards, so even if all our other friends/family told us to stop bothering, we'd still send to the elderly relatives.

Zov · 20/12/2025 22:16

Keeponshining · 20/12/2025 18:08

Oh god. I actually thought you had a point until you described something as ‘a bit working class’

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Yeah, the OP has shown her true colours rapidly with that comment.

Also @iCod What on earth is wrong with being working class? Why do you say it in a derogatory and sneering manner? WTAF is wrong with 'Dear Mum At Christmas' on a card?

Oh dear. You've embarrassed yourself. 😬 And the whole premise of your thread has gone out of the window.

Superhansrantowindsor · 20/12/2025 22:20

I love writing cards, sending and receiving. I enjoy putting them up in the house and I make tags out of them for next year when I take them down. If someone told me that they didn’t want one I’d stop but I really don’t see the harm in them. There are a lot worse things going on right now. If anybody doesn’t want to send them they don’t have to.

laughingnow · 20/12/2025 22:22

catontheironingboard · 20/12/2025 20:27

I like them, and I think it’s a bit sad that it’s dying out as a tradition. I have whittled my list down a lot these days, but for the few left I still enjoy choosing nice ones that I think the recipient will like. I do add an individual message, not just names! I agree that younger people are stopping sending them, but I still have a fair few people on my list who are older, often single or bereaved, eg. former colleagues or friends of my parents who were kind to me as a child, who I know still enjoy and appreciate a card at Christmas.

We all know that Dave at work or one’s thirtysomething friends can text or Slack or email instead. But for Auntie June who lives alone half the country away, or Reg the elderly widower of your godparent, or your mum’s best friend who used to buy you lovely books when you were a kid, or your mentor from early in your career who’s now retired and who you want to show you still think of — those are the people who really do appreciate a card, and honestly I love sending them, and choosing something nice from a museum or something with cats on for Auntie June who loves cats, or whatever. And I still have a few friends my own age who like sending and receiving them, too.

If you don’t care about them, fine. But I do think that being sneery about something someone else has done at their own expense, just to show they’re thinking of you even if momentarily, is way more déclassé than any “working class” card (nice stirring there, OP 😆)

Exactly!

catontheironingboard · 20/12/2025 22:25

Yes to the gift tags!

One of my favourite Christmas memories ever is of making tags out of old Christmas cards as a child. We’d do them at Brownies with pinking shears, a hole punch and baker’s twine and sell them for 10p for ten for charity (1980s prices 😂) I have rarely enjoyed any Christmas activity as an adult as much as that, and it was a pleasure surpassing any number of expensive contemporary light trails with marshmallows or whatever.

Sometimes the simple things are just nicer. And better a Christmas card than a text you never get around to sending.

HostaCentral · 20/12/2025 22:35

I'm so sad people are so mean and lazy they just send an email or text. I love sending and receiving cards. They are little works of art in themselves. I have a neighbour who paints a landscape and sends that as a card every year. A relative is a card designer. Another makes all her cards. I think we are losing a little bit more of tradition every year, and it saddens me.

Branster · 20/12/2025 22:40

I do enjoy writing Christmas cards. And receiving too. I also like the variety of designs and they look so pretty too.
Am I the only one who doesn't choose cards because of a specific charity and only decides based on how nice the cards are? In fact the incidental charity 'donation' doesn't much register for me.
I just want to buy what I think it is a nice card which I think it would be appropriate for the recipient.

catontheironingboard · 20/12/2025 22:51

Branster · 20/12/2025 22:40

I do enjoy writing Christmas cards. And receiving too. I also like the variety of designs and they look so pretty too.
Am I the only one who doesn't choose cards because of a specific charity and only decides based on how nice the cards are? In fact the incidental charity 'donation' doesn't much register for me.
I just want to buy what I think it is a nice card which I think it would be appropriate for the recipient.

Yes I also buy them for the designs. I tend to like ones with houses on, and perhaps birds, or something like a historical card design, or a nice print. I really like matching the card to the recipient and choosing one because I know they’d like it. I have an elderly relative who especially likes cards with robins on, so I look out every year for a nice one. For 20-30 people in total, it doesn’t take me ages, I enjoy it, and I know the recipients appreciate it because they say so to me!

😆 I wouldn’t dare to send a Christmas card to a bunch of Scrooges with affronted sucked-lemon faces on at the very thought of the horror of receiving a small folded piece of recyclable paper product in the post 😂

eggandonion · 20/12/2025 23:07

I buy about 30 cards...dog rescue charity with dogs rehomed during the year...arty ones...and some sort of medieval religious looking ones . They are all from charities.
And the relation specific working class ones obviously.

Enigma54 · 20/12/2025 23:16

This thread has made me think. Back in the day ( 80’s and 90’s) I used to send many cards and received lots back. I was in touch with most of the people and we were likely friends. Postage was much cheaper too!

Now, I’m in my 50’s. I’ve sent 6 cards; 5 to family and 1 to my old cleaning supervisor who I worked for as a student.

I have cancer and my brother has hardly got in touch with me since my life was turned upside down. I am so upset, but accept I can’t change things. I sent him a card ( because he’s family). He sent me a short message, thanking me for the card and then asked for my bank details to send Christmas money. I don’t want any Christmas money or anything from him. Why would he want to send money when he’s not once asked me how I am? How chemo has gone etc. This could be my last Christmas. I’m just focused on my immediate family and young adult kids.

I used to love sending and receiving cards, now I’m very selective..

Thecows · 20/12/2025 23:23

catontheironingboard · 20/12/2025 20:27

I like them, and I think it’s a bit sad that it’s dying out as a tradition. I have whittled my list down a lot these days, but for the few left I still enjoy choosing nice ones that I think the recipient will like. I do add an individual message, not just names! I agree that younger people are stopping sending them, but I still have a fair few people on my list who are older, often single or bereaved, eg. former colleagues or friends of my parents who were kind to me as a child, who I know still enjoy and appreciate a card at Christmas.

We all know that Dave at work or one’s thirtysomething friends can text or Slack or email instead. But for Auntie June who lives alone half the country away, or Reg the elderly widower of your godparent, or your mum’s best friend who used to buy you lovely books when you were a kid, or your mentor from early in your career who’s now retired and who you want to show you still think of — those are the people who really do appreciate a card, and honestly I love sending them, and choosing something nice from a museum or something with cats on for Auntie June who loves cats, or whatever. And I still have a few friends my own age who like sending and receiving them, too.

If you don’t care about them, fine. But I do think that being sneery about something someone else has done at their own expense, just to show they’re thinking of you even if momentarily, is way more déclassé than any “working class” card (nice stirring there, OP 😆)

Totally agree 💯

Christmasiscoming2025 · 20/12/2025 23:25

Everyone is different 🤷‍♀️ I’ve just put the ones we’ve received on the wall tonight and I give them to friends and family but I always write nice messages in them not just to and from whoever 🤷‍♀️

Thecows · 20/12/2025 23:26

catontheironingboard · 20/12/2025 22:07

Don’t you have any older relatives/friends/teachers/colleagues/mentors who live around the country and/or who you can’t easily meet up with and don’t ring but still like to exchange news with and ask how they are once a year?

If you don’t, can you at least imagine that other people do? Why do you assume there isn’t a good reason and we’re all idiots for sending them?

I don’t ever meet up with an old tutor from university who mentored me, and who retired to live across the country where I never have time to go, and neither am I likely to ring or text her, but I know she still really appreciates a card at Christmas with my news on. I have relatives and relatives in law who like to hear how my DD is getting on, and who send her money occasionally, but who aren’t my friends, and who I’d never otherwise meet up with or message. I know older, quite distant relatives who’ve been bereaved this year, and I’m not going to send them a cheery text suggesting going to the pub from half the country away, and I know they don’t want a phone call, but I have still sent them a card with a message saying I’m thinking of them at Christmas. I send DD’s music teacher a card saying thank you for her support with a small gift; I send my boss at work a card because he and his wife always make a point of sending one personally written to everyone in the organisation; I send a card every Christmas to the people who I rehomed my cat from, with a message and a photo saying how she is. I’m not going to meet up with any of them and none of them are my “mates”: a card is exactly the right thing.

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Again, perfectly expresses my opinion too

eggandonion · 20/12/2025 23:47

@Enigma54 people are very strange...maybe your brother just can't find any words let alone the right ones.
Maybe at times a card and a one line message is better than nothing?
Take care of yourself.

Ladamesansmerci · 20/12/2025 23:49

I hate them too. I have ADHD, and one of the things I just can't cope with is having to organise and send Christmas cards. I feel so pressured to return them, but I just can't keep on top of it. Particularly any that need posting. I don't mind getting them and appreciate the gesture (though privately think they are pointless), I just can't handle the expectation of sending one back.

Then there's the weird Christmas card hierarchy. Close family members need special ones choosing. Neighbours need a cheap pack of generic ones. Family ones go above the fireplace, neighbour ones are resigned to less seen window sill 😂

I usually now just throw a social media status out saying I'm donating £15 to charity instead. I did WWF last year!

I'm not anti-cards generally. I send things like birthday cards and enjoy decorating the envelope and writing long messages. I can deal with one card at once. I just hate Christmas cards!

Enigma54 · 20/12/2025 23:52

@eggandonionyes you might be right. It’s just that there’s been no contact for months and months. It feels false. Maybe I’m being over sensitive.

Roobarbtwo · 20/12/2025 23:52

I have had plenty of council house digs made at me in my time - but never working class ones.

My mum speaks five languages. She was a single parent. Working class

I would never use working class as a slur. Working class people can do well and do you know what - when I was growing up in the 80s not once did any friend who's family had more money than mine ever make me feel bad for being working class. No one cared

No one gave a shiny shit.

G1ngerbread · 20/12/2025 23:52

I still send (hand deliver because stamps are expensive) cards to 10 neighbours in a block of flats I moved out of 5 years ago! And receive them back, 3 out of those 10 still send money for my children- one of which is an adult. I only do 3 neighbours where I live now. I lived in my old property for over 15 years and was close to lots of people. It is a bit of a chore though.

Roobarbtwo · 20/12/2025 23:54

You can have all the opinions you like about Christmas cards Op. But don't use it to make snide digs about people like me sending "dear mum" cards. Because that makes you look like a crashing snob

Mydadsbirthday · 21/12/2025 00:24

Hammy19 · 20/12/2025 18:14

I only got one this year and haven't sent one in years

But, we have got 5 new sets of neighbours this year so I have sent one to everyone on the street then we all might get to know each other a bit

I did this when we moved into our cul de sac 10 years ago, introducing ourselves and our young DC. Most people sent one back so it was a great way of getting to know our neighbours, one invited us round to their neighbours drinks party on Xmas eve so that was lovely and generally our neighbours are lovely.

We all write cards to each other and it's just quite nice. We are 40s, there are a few slightly younger / same age families but mostly older people in their 60s+ who do send cards.

I also send them to various friends who I've exchanged cards with for years, about 7-8.

I think they look nice and easily recycled after Christmas. Bit shocked at those who don't even open them, that's really miserable!

Denim4ever · 21/12/2025 00:26

iCod · 20/12/2025 15:00

They're pointless, wasteful and a poor form of communication. All I do is read the "Happy Christmas from Joe and Julie" and walk them to the recycling.

I haven't sent any for over 25 years and I just don't see the need for them at all.

They are supposed to be displayed and then recycled. I use mine to make gift tags

Mydadsbirthday · 21/12/2025 00:37

Oh forgot to say I asked my teen DD to get me a book of stamps this week and she had absolutely no idea what this was 😂
Also and not as funny, but 8 1st class stamps cost £13.60 which I was gobsmacked at so I probably won't bother with cards for much longer...

Sesma · 21/12/2025 06:11

I use second class for cards and post early, but I'm glad I bought a load of picture first class several years ago when they were about 60-70p, I'm using Game of Thrones ones at the moment if I need first. They have more than doubled in price.

Lelophants · 21/12/2025 06:48

Roobarbtwo · 20/12/2025 23:52

I have had plenty of council house digs made at me in my time - but never working class ones.

My mum speaks five languages. She was a single parent. Working class

I would never use working class as a slur. Working class people can do well and do you know what - when I was growing up in the 80s not once did any friend who's family had more money than mine ever make me feel bad for being working class. No one cared

No one gave a shiny shit.

I agree it’s not a slur and really rude of the op. Pretty nasty person.

Lelophants · 21/12/2025 06:51

The point for those who quoted me, is that the person sending them does think theyre doing a nice thing.
And throwing something away before opening it is just nasty.