Is our postman a cheeky fucker?

[Sam9769]

I have just lost 3 stone in weight and decided to buy a new second hand wardrobe through Ebay. I will admit that I have been purchasing a lot of clothes etc.
Our postman keeps commenting to my husband about the parcels arriving on a daily basis. On one occasion he said to my husband "She must have bought the whole shop by now! The other day he said "There were no parcels for a few days, so I thought that things were under control!"
This is not even a postman we have known for many years, he's only been our postman for about 18 months.

I feel annoyed that he thinks that he has any right to comment on my parcels.
He's job is to deliver the mail and keep his opinions to himself.
Is he a cheeky fucker or AIBU?

Your parties must be quite the riot of the level of conversation is 'she must have bought the whole shop by now'. A wild gathering of the vacuous and witless.

OP I had some flowers delivered once by a courier who said 'Ooh someone's got an admirer' to which my reply was 'no, my father died a few days ago'. I posted on hear and was told to lighten up, he's just being friendly etc etc.
Seems as long as it's called 'bants' people can say whatever the fuck they like, and anyone who prefers not to discuss the contents of their delivery with a complete stranger is a weirdo.

Are you saying men can't have internalised misogyny?

Sounds a bit sexist

/joke

I guarantee he would not be making jokes to a man about his purchases

^ This....

... is just ridiculous

Since I've witnessed this I'm guessing your guarantee is not worth anything

When Ebay was great back in the day, I kept buying things, so much so that my postman rang the bell and on hearing me coming to the door to answer it, said 'it's only me' 😂That's when I thought I had better throttle back on the spending! Your postie's joking wouldn't bother me TBH.

You’ve already lightened up - WELL DONE! Now you need to LIGHTEN UP !

He's just making a bit of light-hearted conversation, and he doesn't seem to be slandering you or saying anything that isn't true.

Someone made an honest mistake and you reported them? I understand you were bereaved, but how was the courier to know that? People are just trying to make a little human conversation and they're treated like criminals.

She didn’t report him did she?

If he’s not saying anything to you and only your husband, I’d be inclined to think it’s your husband but he’s blaming your postie 👀

YABU - ask yourself why you care what the postman thinks of you.

My postman is just the same, and so is the Evri driver. It’s a standing joke with them thst I get parcels on a daily basis. I enjoy the interaction with both of them, and also joking back thst I keep them both in a job. I think you sound incredibly uptight and humourless, OP.

I’m really shocked at some of the responses on here. It’s like some of you think that your mothers and grandmothers did all the hard work, won the war on sexism and now you don’t need to do anything more because we’re all equal and all treated fairly nowadays 🤦🏻‍♀️

He's just chatty (his name isn't Roger is it? if so, we share a postie).

Our regular postie knows everything and everyone, teases my adult son about his regular 'empty' parcels (Warhammer models, so bulky but light) and mentions he knows when the seed catalogues have been delivered because me and my three neighbours all get parcels from the same place that week.

He's bored and he chats. It's no big deal.

And in response to the suggestion that the same sort of comments would not be made to a man, my husband buys a lot of shoes - he is the male equivalent of Imelda Marcos. whenever I answer the door to the postie or Evri when they deliver more shoes, they tell me the parcel isn’t for me, roll their eyes, laugh, and say that my other half has been buying shoes again.

I despair at what our society it headed towards if a post man can’t make a little joke about parcels without fearing for his job.

If you like him - funny
If you don't like him - cheeky f*cker

@HeadyLamarr

Again, not the same thing at all and not what the OP was talking about. You have a friendly, chatty postman. She has a postman who is commenting to her husband about her spending being out of control.

Blimey, poor fella out in all weathers delivering your parcels, being cheerful, making light-hearted conversation with your family members and you're complaining about him ???? Just lighten up and enjoy the fact that you can fit into the fabulous clothes he's bringing for you !

It's a bit of humour, lighten up. I can't understand why anyone would be bothered by this.

Congrats on the weight loss! Hope it was a healthy and happy journey 😍

PS yes he is so rude! Absolutely not his place!

Mine comments to me about my adult son buying overpriced boxes of air, so I think it's pretty much the same. I don't mind, son doesn't mind ("I think he's find it's overpriced boxes of plastic crap, Mum") because it's just a lighthearted comment about how often he has to knock on our door.

I didn't report him. Unless posting on MN is a kind of reporting!!

But what do you actually mean by this? OP can tell him she’d like him to stop making jokes to her husband. She hasn’t done that. What else can she do?

it’s so trivial to get worked about up about something but only online- what’s the point? Unless she’s going to take action it’s a waste of emotional energy (which is, as we all know, the exhaustion of women in our world)

I don't think he's saying it about your weight loss. Maybe has hit a nerve though? My postie says it to me as I get vinted parcels all the time and I haven't lost any weight. Mine are also clothes for the kids but I just laugh, it's banter. I have a female postie that also has a joke about it. They're just being friendly I'm sure they're sick of saying it 100 times a day. But people will moan if they're not friendly enough.
He also comments on my husband's parcels as he orders lots of DIY stuff (hasn't he finished that job by now etc). It's just a joke.

Thank you, it was no jabs!