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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you honestly what are your first thoughts on seeing this?

644 replies

gemful · 09/12/2025 11:44

NC’d for this

A couple. 2 dc (no childcare)
A brand new, new build house. Mortgaged.
Two brand new cars.
They don’t dress designer but the present well.
She has a few designer handbags.
gadgets are always good brands, latest I phones, shark hairdryers, robot hoover.
very organised and tidy home, both work full time in good jobs.
They do family outings every few weekends but not every weekend.
Honesty, what are your first thoughts?!

OP posts:
PeachySmile2 · 09/12/2025 15:38

Are you jealous?

DoubleHardBastard · 09/12/2025 15:38

gemful · 09/12/2025 14:24

The neighbour said “new car!? Is one new car not enough?” I laughed (nervously) and said “ah well I can’t let him have all the fun!” She then said…it’s a bit overkill no?…or did you win the lotto?head tilt…

You're earning 130k as a couple and they think you've won the lottery? Are they rich, OP?

When they gave you the head tilt, you should have said "maybe" followed by a tinkly laugh and your very own head tilt.

Seriously though, I'd be saving more and spending less. It's not a very large joint income and hard times can fall on anyone at anytime.

Rosealea · 09/12/2025 15:39

I honestly don't think anything.

TheMorgenmuffel · 09/12/2025 15:47

Nothing you describe would cause me to have any thoughts at all. Nothing about it would get my attention.
I don't mean that in a bad way 😁 its just unremarkable for want of a better word.
Your neighbour is weird though.

Original poster
gemful · 09/12/2025 15:48

DoubleHardBastard · 09/12/2025 15:38

You're earning 130k as a couple and they think you've won the lottery? Are they rich, OP?

When they gave you the head tilt, you should have said "maybe" followed by a tinkly laugh and your very own head tilt.

Seriously though, I'd be saving more and spending less. It's not a very large joint income and hard times can fall on anyone at anytime.

Show quote history

We have ample savings. We save over 2k per month. Pensions are good etc.

OP posts:
Ohnobackagain · 09/12/2025 15:48

My first thought was ‘good luck to them’ @gemful

adaywithy · 09/12/2025 15:50

nothing

Jamesblonde2 · 09/12/2025 15:51

Average family, why?
Probably up to their eyes in debt mind you, so many seem to be who have bags and new cars.
Loads if fake bags of course.
They holiday in Turkey and Dubai don’t they?

Left · 09/12/2025 15:51

gemful · 09/12/2025 11:44

NC’d for this

A couple. 2 dc (no childcare)
A brand new, new build house. Mortgaged.
Two brand new cars.
They don’t dress designer but the present well.
She has a few designer handbags.
gadgets are always good brands, latest I phones, shark hairdryers, robot hoover.
very organised and tidy home, both work full time in good jobs.
They do family outings every few weekends but not every weekend.
Honesty, what are your first thoughts?!

Inconsistent use of grammar, full stops not always used and capitals not always at the start of sentences. Some minor spelling errors. Probably isn’t a writer.

Redpeach · 09/12/2025 15:52

gemful · 09/12/2025 12:35

Honestly I don’t brag, I don’t feel any of it is worth bragging about. My sister and friends will visit and have said things. My sister especially, she asks a lot of questions. I have argued with her on this. 😭 she asked me what I earn and nearly had a heart attack. I earn 62k. She said she assumed I was on half that. I try not to talk about money tbh.

Apart from on the internet

RainbowBagels · 09/12/2025 15:52

Does you sister look down on you? You wotk full time in a professional job. Its not hard to guess you have a good income. It sounds like she thinks you wouldn't be able to earn that much. Do you work in the public sector? Lots of people think teachers/ civil servants etc dont earn that much but that is a full time middle management salary where I am.

LovingLimePeer · 09/12/2025 15:52

I had 3 thoughts.
Family are either:

  1. Wealthy (earning >200k as a household)
  2. Not very good with money and probably don't have much of a pension.
  3. Or drug dealing

But I'm really judgemental and so tight that I wouldn't even buy a new car if I was a billionaire!

Left · 09/12/2025 15:53

OHHHH SORRY!!!!

Missed the updates and context, I’m a muppet 😬 🙈

Howdiditenduplikeit · 09/12/2025 15:55

I’d say they were status driven - I’d think they were possibly the first generation in their family to earn well so like to show that off.

good for them.

EarthlingsAhoy · 09/12/2025 15:55

gemful · 09/12/2025 15:07

We bought our first house about 13 years ago and we made a good enough profit on that. We used 120k as a deposit between savings and the money made. We kept savings back also. We traded in our older cars when buying the new ones. I spent 25k on mine cash wise.

Show quote history

Toyota Corolla is a fairly normal car and not showy, so don't what the neighbour is on about.
I'm guessing you do have quite a large mortgage and ltv though based on that deposit, which personally would concern me more. I think I'd have been paying more of the mortgage off than buying a brand new car, but it's each to their own.

Moggies3 · 09/12/2025 15:57

And the point of the question is?...

Penisbeakeralltheclassics · 09/12/2025 15:57

gemful · 09/12/2025 14:24

The neighbour said “new car!? Is one new car not enough?” I laughed (nervously) and said “ah well I can’t let him have all the fun!” She then said…it’s a bit overkill no?…or did you win the lotto?head tilt…

Really?! Bloody hell, I’d have said fuck off!

PinkMagpie · 09/12/2025 15:59

beefthief · 09/12/2025 11:46

This seems entirely normal unless you're going to drip feed that it's actually Fred and Rose West

This has really made me laugh 🤣

Theslummymummy · 09/12/2025 16:00

My first thoughts are why do you care what people think of this

MyDeftDuck · 09/12/2025 16:02

Not my place to judge or have an opinion………everyone is different.

EasilyRemedied · 09/12/2025 16:05

Lucky them

skyeisthelimit · 09/12/2025 16:06

Around here a lot of benefit families move into new builds on new estates , out of private rentals, as they want the security.

I wouldn't know a designer bag if it smacked me round the face, so I wouldn't think anything.

If somebody has a brand new car, then I assume that they have bought it on finance as not many people can afford to buy brand new outright.

AnotherDayDawns · 09/12/2025 16:08

I couldn't really give a toss, but anyone can get new cars and all the other stuff, with loans and credit cards. I think it's extremely shallow.

Slightyamusedandsilly · 09/12/2025 16:12

YaWeeFurryBastard · 09/12/2025 13:38

Yes, seriously. I’d think it was unfortunate that their kids were in after school club or left to get on with their homework on their own every day and that they couldn’t afford to work less.

What do you mean modelling an expectation? That a new car takes priority over time with family?

Show quote history

Modelling an expectation that work is a requirement of life. They have two girls. The mum working models that work is essential and that women's work is as crucial as mens.

There is more to work than the money it brings in.

Fcuk the car. It's a piece of metal.

JamieCannister · 09/12/2025 16:28

gemful · 09/12/2025 11:44

NC’d for this

A couple. 2 dc (no childcare)
A brand new, new build house. Mortgaged.
Two brand new cars.
They don’t dress designer but the present well.
She has a few designer handbags.
gadgets are always good brands, latest I phones, shark hairdryers, robot hoover.
very organised and tidy home, both work full time in good jobs.
They do family outings every few weekends but not every weekend.
Honesty, what are your first thoughts?!

My first thoughts are that they are not my kind of people at all.

Either they are very very well off, and can afford to waste money buying brand new houses (15% over equaivalent second hand value?) and brand new cars. Or they are not that well off and they are spending every penny on finance to present a "new things" lifestyle.

Either way, not my kind of people. At all.