to tell this nosey mother to shove off?

[theBOD]

long sorry but need an opinion.
i was meant to be playing football with mates and my lectures finished about an hour early. now seeing as i lived about an hours drive from where we were playing it made no sense for me to go home so i decided i'd just drive to the park where we play and do some work(play solitare) on my laptop for the hour and listen to the radio.
so i parked on the road beside the pitches, which also happens to be opposite a playground. after about half an hour some woman came over to me and knocked on my window asking me "what do you think you're doing" and telling me to move as it was "not right" and i was making the parents "nervous".
apparently i should not be parked and on a laptop near children as a man on his own as this obviously in her mind made me some sort of sex predator.
so i told her that what i was doing was none of her business and told her to get away from my car. she then threatened to call the police (she didn't) and get her husband out (which she did).
anyway was i unreasonable to use some very choice words to her and her husband when they came over to me the second time claiming they didn't want trouble and just thought it was best if i left?

Message withdrawn

Oh sorry guys -- it's all the media.

Of course, I completely forgot, it's all the media. How stupid of me.

Bod -- telling her it was none of her business is very confrontational. You are shaken by it to come on here and ask about it. You have your own doubts about how you handled it.

Aubergine is talking total bolleaux!!!!!!

best ignored I think

Aubergine - If you saw a bloke in a car next to a playground with a laptop, why would you go and talk to him? Whats the laptop got to do with it?

If you saw a bloke without a laptop, would you react the same?

Nice post theBOD, BTW

I would tell someone it was none of their business why I was sitting in a car on a public road too.

I don't think you were being unreasonable. However, I do think that people have no idea what the real risks are in relation to child abduction. I am forever reading that there are no more abductions now than there were years ago and this simply does not appear to be the case (see here).

I think the hysteria that surrounds peadophiles prevents people making a realistic assessment of the risks that there are and polarises opinions. You appear to either have to be in the camp that says there is a monster on every corner or the one that argues that most men are nice and therefore no concern is justified. Surely the right approach lies somewhere in between?

ah, sorry, DSM, I misread that bit, if she got her husband and threatened him with the police before he swore at her, consider my mind changed.

i am often to be found lurking in my car - and never has anyone kncked on my window or insinuated anything - becuase i am a woman i assume - ut if i had the balls - metaphorically and literally - and i was accused of wanking off to my laptop whilst watching children - i think i might well tell then to fuck right off.

Trouble is WannaBe, we know that there are badly run offenders hostels that allow offenders to roam free. I suppose we combat this by arming our children with good sense, likewise I don't ever leave them in vunerable situation with men, my family are way too cold to be 'risky' and my dcs are still young enough for me to always know where they are.
I wouldn't blindly trust anyone with my dcs and I would suspect every lone man in a park I hope, although any odd behaviour I do think the worst. I have never read the Daily Mail or any other red top!

"Bod -- telling her it was none of her business is very confrontational. You are shaken by it to come on here and ask about it. You have your own doubts about how you handled it.
"

no my only gripe is with myself for lowering myself to her level and swearing. hence the thread title only questions wether this situation warranted choice words. i have no problem with how i handled the rest of the secnario. and how is telling someone that what i am doing in a public place whilst sitting in my own property is none of their business "very confrontational". it's simply a statment of fact.

Message withdrawn

I'm not talking bolleaux. And it's very Daily Mail to ignore opinions that challenge your own.

That was meant to read I wouldn't suspect

I have heard (not from the DM I hasten to add....) that on a several occasions men have been arrested for sitting outside houses in cars with a lap tops.

The police have actually charged them with 'stealing' internet access from those homes not protecting themselves.

Its a funny one.... but sitting outside a park playing solitaire is hardly in the same league.

You shouldn't have lost your cool though, brought yourself down to the same low standards she has IMO.

a lot of it is the media, yes.

Anyone remember the news of the world's naming and shaming of paedophiles? Anyone remember the histeria that provoked? and the paediatrician who was attacked because some thickoes obviously assumed that "paed" equals "paedo".

Message withdrawn

basicall she came off as someone who saw brass Eyes "Paedogeddon" and thought it was a factual documentry.

I would have been concerned that he was using his lap top to access mumsnet and judge the school run dresses and footwear.

theBod - you are a very amusing man

I remember when I was working for the health service bulletins going wound warning people abuut bogus social workers/health visitors and to warn parents to be vigilant.

These were women trying fraudulently to gain access to children.

And I too have a close family member who has been exposed to abuse from within the family. (said "abuser" no longer has access)

amner actually I would assume someone sitting in a car with a laptop was probably using someone's unsecured wireless network to get on to the internet.

But I wouldn't challenge that - if people don't secure their networks then they do lay themselves open to that just a bit.

Yes he fits right into one little bit of mn that's for sure. Getting on his high horse, swearing and abuse, refusing to see anyone else's point of view. Good show all round.

Totally off topic - but why would someone care if someone else was using their wireless? Whenever my friends come to stay, they connect to my wireless, and my ex boyfriend used to connect to his neighbours in the flat below.

They used to text him before they connected so he could get on if he wanted.

Why do people have issue with that?

Sorry - totally off topic..

there have been several instances round here of bogus social workers trying to gain access to children.

In all instances they have been women.

I would be far more likely to challenge someone knocking on my door claiming to be a social worker, than someone sitting outside in their car.

Stuff - I assume you don't have any pictures of your children on your profile? after all it's even easier for someone to get hold of them and doctor them accordingly...

Why should`nt he get on his high horse He has done nothing wrong

He was`nt abusive at first only when the woman came back out with her husband
Then I think it was fair enough