Page 18 | Would you tolerate DP spending £7k on World Cup trip?

CleanSkin · 07/12/2025 03:35

My DH is going to try to do it too. It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity so in all honesty I’m not going to stop him from having his fun.
You & your DD can enjoy the time together; it’s not a massive deal about the date as she is only two & will only attach significance to his absence if her parents make a big thing out of it.

kkloo · 07/12/2025 03:41

Rigaboni · 06/12/2025 18:59

Scotland are shit and haven’t qualified in something like 23 years

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Does he go to see their games the rest of the time or only now that they've qualified?

Pinkchristmastree1 · 07/12/2025 04:08

Well he is irresponsible with money ..he can't afford it ,he doesn't earn enough to afford it .
So you do you op ,you and your daughter go on a girls holiday and do nice things together, because he has chosen to prioritise himself over family

Doingtheboxerbeat · 07/12/2025 04:21

I voted yabu purely for not providing really obvious information from the get go , of course he's being unreasonable for getting into massive amounts of debt for a glorified game of fetch football match.

SweetnsourNZ · 07/12/2025 05:23

Franpie · 06/12/2025 19:19

I wouldn’t care about 2nd birthday as your child is too young to know what date her bday is. I’d just change the date of the celebration.

But spending £7k on a credit card when he only earns £38k I’d have a massive issue with.

Yeah, the monthly interest is going to be huge in no time.

mrssunshinexxx · 07/12/2025 05:58

I love my husband and he works really hard so I wouldn’t mind. He has sadly missed our children’s birthdays to work. I make an extra fuss on the day then we have another birthday tea at the weekend

RestitutionGranted · 07/12/2025 05:59

DH and I get around this by me being “tit-for-tat” - that expression for it used to irritate me but that’s basically what it is

for me it’s not so much the ££ - it’s more the “time off”. Put simply, if he has a luxury holiday away from it all with no responsibilities, I want one too.

DH goes most years on a golf trip abroad with his mates, but one year they went to Vegas which was £££. All his holidays are my idea of hell so I’m never jealous about where he’s going and helps “even things out”, which may sound petty to some, but works for us.

I go to a European city for 3-4 nights with a friend, stay somewhere gorgeous and eat out at fancy places. It’s a great break away from all the drudgery and chores. Been doing it for nearly 20 years! We save money elsewhere and prioritise travel.

RestitutionGranted · 07/12/2025 06:10

Rosealea · 07/12/2025 00:45

Why not go too as a family? Either way it's no drama, at 2 your child won't know when it's birthday is so just have it when he gets back.

For anyone of child bearing age thinking of going to Texas for the England Croatia match I’d think very carefully about whether there is even the smallest chance that you could be pregnant and at risk of an ectopic pregnancy.

USA isn’t a safe choice these days.

sittingonabeach · 07/12/2025 06:27

Why are people suggesting a joint holiday, he is already going to be in huge debt why add to that, how irresponsible. Also prices are going to be astronomical because of the WC

Original poster

Rigaboni · 07/12/2025 06:48

To answer some questions that have popped up a few times

why don’t you and DD join him? I have been to Boston before (many times) and have no desire to return when prices are at an absolute premium, nor do I want to bring DD on such a long flight. I couldn’t justify spending stupid money on a trip like this. He is sharing a hotel room with a friend any way.

Why don’t you book a 10 day or similar solo holiday on his return. Firstly I couldn’t afford it, or couldn’t justify spending the money solely on me. I wouldn’t want to be away from my DD for even 3 nights let alone 10.

why dont you and DD go on holiday whilst he’s on his trip. Solo parenting whilst abroad isn’t my idea of fun.

OP posts:

Boomer55 · 07/12/2025 06:49

Rigaboni · 06/12/2025 18:26

DP declared he is travelling to the World Cup and will be staying in Boston for 10 nights, to watch two games. He will miss DDs 2nd birthday. It will cost £4k for flights and hotels, perhaps around £2k spending money and maybe around £1k for tickets.

We have separate finances, I earn a bit more. We pay a percentage of our salary in to a joint account to cover joint bills.

How would you feel about this?

YABU = it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity and you can always earn more money
YANBU = I wouldn’t tolerate him treating himself to a £7k solo holiday

No, I wouldn’t but then again, I love football, so would do the same.😉

If it’s his money, then I cannot see what your objections are. 🤷‍♀️

Original poster

Rigaboni · 07/12/2025 06:51

Boomer55 · 07/12/2025 06:49

No, I wouldn’t but then again, I love football, so would do the same.😉

If it’s his money, then I cannot see what your objections are. 🤷‍♀️

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I presume you didn’t read my updates where I explained how much we earn, that he has nowhere near this amount of money saved and that he will be paying it on a credit card therefore paying it off for possibly years to come?

OP posts:

Bikergran · 07/12/2025 06:52

As long as YOU get to spend 7K on a trip of a lifetime while he minds the house and children (and I don't mean you returning to a filthy house and a fortnight's laundry) then fair enough. Have you put this idea to him?

Bikergran · 07/12/2025 06:52

Rigaboni · 07/12/2025 06:51

I presume you didn’t read my updates where I explained how much we earn, that he has nowhere near this amount of money saved and that he will be paying it on a credit card therefore paying it off for possibly years to come?

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Sorry, missed that. No, he's a twat.

PreggersWithBaby2 · 07/12/2025 06:53

I'd let him off. We earn similarly to you, and our family holidays have been local weekend breaks since the kids have come as we dont prioritise family holidays yet (we do things as a family but out children are young so its just not a personal priority yet). We've worked hard all our working lives. We are Irish and the excitement building here at the thoughts of Ireland just getting to the world cup and im not even a massive soccer fan... the house will get done, the bills will be paid. Life can be fucking miserable sometimes. If I had something that cost similar that I really really wanted to attend he'd be pushing me out the door and booking my flights for me!

Ginmonkeyagain · 07/12/2025 06:59

I think he is being optimistic on the hotel costs. Boston is wickedly expensive for hotels and doesn't really have enough at times of high demand. We paid £1k for a room (we were sharing a 3 room apartment with friends) in an Airbnb in Somerville for 3 nights over the marathon last year.

sittingonabeach · 07/12/2025 07:00

There’s going to be some really stupid people in heaps load of debt just because of a game of football. And I love football but I couldn’t be that stupid and that selfish to wreck family finances for it

Twilightstarbright · 07/12/2025 07:18

Given your updates yeah I would be very annoyed. He can’t afford it, and it’s irresponsible to put that sort of thing on a credit card.

I sympathise as I’m a big football fan (we spend about 5k a year on PL season tickets) but it doesn’t mean you can jeopardise financial security- we can afford the season tickets but I wouldn’t have them if I needed to put them on a credit card.

I really appreciate it’s a huge deal for a Scotland fan but surely they’ll be big fan parks and big screens set up for the games?

If you said ‘our household income is 300k a year’ then my answer would be different. But he’s an adult who needs to accept the financial realities of his situation and that he has a child he’s financially responsible for.

Whoevenarethey · 07/12/2025 07:25

I think you should have put the financial details in your initial post as that makes a big difference. I agree he doesn't have the funds to go and the impact will be on the rest of the family in not being able to get things in the house done or trips together.
It would be a no from me.

PurpleThistle7 · 07/12/2025 08:52

I like sports a lot and can definitely see why it would be fun to go. But with your updates it’s just silly. I would like to do lots of things but I can actually only do what we can afford. If it’s all going on credit he just can’t afford it, super simple.

secretrugbyfan · 07/12/2025 08:54

It's not once in a lifetime, it's every 4 years. This year is the first time that tickets are affected by dynamic pricing (think back to the Oasis debacle in 2024) so the chances are tickets will cost more than he's probably anticipated.

Tell him to wait until 2030....the WC is in Morocco, Portugal and Spain. Time to save the money to go, and you can combine as a holiday for your child (who will be 6) and you (as long as you don't mind the heat).

YouHaveAnArse · 07/12/2025 08:57

EconomyClassRockstar · 07/12/2025 03:18

Ok, there's Jersey hotels near Meadowlands that are ok and then there's hotels near Meadowlands that are really in Newark and are absolutely shit, have nothing to do nearby that's safe and I would rather stick a fork in my eye than stay in. I'm thinking for 400 quid for 5 nights at World Cup time, you may have accidentally booked the second. I know this area really well so feel free to message me if you want to doublecheck what you've booked. Also, I'm not entirely sure what experience you're hoping to soak up because Meadowlands is not really a "soak up the experience" kind of place. It's REALLY strict about non ticket holders and it's just kind of in the middle of an old wasteland with one of the craziest malls, American Dream, right next door. You can't walk to it, except from the mall. You can't go to a nearby bar and hear the noise. The nearest bar is in the mall and you can't hear anything there over the noise of the freakin mall! If you can get a ticket for a tailgating party in the car park, you'd be good but from what I'm hearing locally, you would have to have a ticket for the game to get a ticket for the tailgate.

To the doubters, you 100% can get a $30 ish train ticket from Secaucus to Boston, traveling off peak. I'd book that very soon as the trains will 100% take all WC travel off the off peak schedule in the next few days. Also, the Gilette stadium isn't actually in Boston. So price yourselves travel for that too.

Anyway, I hope this helps a little with local info!

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A parking spot at the Boston stadium alone is $175.

Worralorra · 07/12/2025 08:57

I voted YABU. I would have voted YANBU if A) you were married and B) had joint finances.
But he’s clearly not as committed to family to the extent that you wish he were…

hby9628 · 07/12/2025 08:59

I would be fine with this but agree it should be a discussion not a declaration.

CloudSky · 07/12/2025 09:00

Rigaboni · 06/12/2025 18:34

Whilst we don’t have joint finances we have joint savings goals. For example, new carpets, get the garden done which now we won’t be able to afford to do because he’s getting himself in to debt and will spent the next however long paying it off. We also won’t be able to afford a family holiday for the next couple of years because I’m not prepared to pay for all of us. He doesn’t have £7k or anywhere close in savings so it will be going on a credit card

Debt?! No. He’s a lunatic. I wouldn’t even stay with someone this financially irresponsible. Disaster waiting to happen!!