Family Christmas Issue

[ChristmasIssue]

We are staying at home for Xmas this year as we got a dog back in April, don’t have anyone to have him and don’t want to leave him anyway.

As we wouldn’t be visiting anyone, back in September, we said to our family that everyone is welcome to come to us if they would like but we understand if people want to do other things or stay at home themselves.

8 relatives have chosen to come to us, including my cousin with 2 children aged 7 and 2. Everyone coming is aware we have a new dog and that he was our reason for staying home for Xmas.

Now we are less than 3 weeks til Xmas and my cousin has said that she isn’t happy with her children being around our dog and asked us what we plan to do. I was a bit annoyed as we had been clear about everything but I’ve said the dog will be here, although I’m happy to keep the dog out of one room all the time and in another room whilst we eat dinner. My cousin has said this isn’t good enough, that her children should be able to move around the house as they wish without worrying about our dog. She is suggesting kennels or that our dog stays outside or is made to stay in one room. Our dog is small, very clam etc, so no trouble but I do understand that dogs aren’t for everyone.

Another relative has waded in and is asking if our dog can go elsewhere for the time they are all visiting, which is 3 days in total. I’ve said no, that won’t be happening. Now cousin and this other relative are trying to involve more relatives and get them to say they are not happy with the dog being here. I’ve ignored their texts and calls today. The texts are saying that cousin and her children will no longer be able to come if the dog stays, that I’m cruel to prioritise our dog over a child and that it’s too late for them to go anywhere else so I’m making her spend it alone as a single mum. The other relative is also now saying she is allergic to dogs so I would be making her Xmas difficult. There was no mention of this previously and she agreed to come knowing we had a dog.

Tomorrow I plan to text to say that if they no longer want to come, that’s a shame, but I understand and that if anyone else feels the same, to let me know due to food and drinks order.

My partner and kids (older) have said that next year we are staying home and no one is invited!

What do you think of the whole situation and do you think I’ve been fair? I really wish I hadn’t bothered inviting anyone.

Are you a cat person? Or a humans only person?

….or she can arrange for the items to be collected and stored elsewhere ready for Christmas at her home.

Will the items fit in her vehicle? How was she going to get them home from yours after the Christmas get together?

Don’t be emotionally blackmailed by her and others.

The cheeky, ungrateful few will have to make alternative festive arrangements.

Or the OP's cousin.....?

I'm allergic to dogs so usually taking the position of 'of course you can't just turn up with a dog' on these threads.

Not here. absolutely within your rights for them to jog on if they don't like it. You weren't really hugely offering to have everyone, you were just being polite and making it clear the dog would be with you!

They can get lost, it is the dog's home and you were always clear about the dog being there. I wouldn't even shut my dog in another room tbh, she'd be upset and scratch at the door and I would not be able to relax

I am someone who isn't normally a fan of dogs being treated as equals, and often roll my eyes at some of the posts on here that are so pro-dog.

However, you are absolutely NBU! The reason you are staying home is because of your DDog. No way would I be pushing him out in anyway, for anyone.

And that is your choice, so obviously you would have immediately declined. This lot didn't, and are now trying to dictate rules to the OP in her own house. They now have ample time to organise their own dog-free festivities at their own expense, aren't they lucky!!!!

Oh dear. Are you quite alright?

Oops, re my earlier post, just seen you’ve sent a wonderful, clear message to the family group and your cousin with a deadline to respond.

Great stuff.

Thankfully I don't know any people like this. And if I did I'd be glad to keep them away from home with my vicious and terrifying dog (i.e. My tiny, curly cockapoo)

Edit to say DD had a birthday party at our house earlier this year with school friends. The dog was fully involved, even sat in the pass the parcel circle. The girls loved it and no parent expressed any concern. One of the girls made the dog a bracelet 😂

Even though I'm not a "dog person", the OP made the situation clear from the start, so it's the relatives who are being ridiculous.
If they all cancel, the OP will obviously have a much nicer day without them - result!

Very much a human only person. I’d never want a cat in the house either.

This^

ungrateful arseholes.

Oh dear.

Most things in life serve no real purpose. You are obviously totally oblivious to the health and social benefits from having a dog. For starters how many people including older people, do you know that get any exercise, let along enough? Dog owners are out day in day out regardless of the weather which is a massive health benefit. Companion (not working) dogs for disabled children? The mental health benefits? And do the list goes on and on.

You will find that the majority of dogs owners are far from being socially inadequate and are more likely to be socially adept than a high proportion of the population.

wow what a load of moaning minnies, you have a dog love them , why would anyone kick off this close to xmas saying the dog needs to go while they visit, i would cancal all visitors have a lovely xmas with your family dog, dont every ask them again

I'm sure it's unintentional, but this is hilarious 😂!

Normal adults send things all over the world without a. Your advice and b. Vast amounts of peanuts 😂🤣😂

Your cousin is being batshit BUT from what you say about her normally being nice, it sounds like it's because she's stressed rather than because she's a horrible person.

I wonder if it's just occurred to her how stressful it will be trying to constantly make sure a toddler and small kid don't poke the dog for several days.

If you're feeling kind, you could say that you guys (and your big kids) will help supervise her kids around the dog, so she's not having to be "on" all the time.

Dog sounds adorable.

"Will the items fit in her vehicle? How was she going to get them home from yours after the Christmas get together?"

Good question...not the most important issue but how were the bike and the doll house getting home anyway?

I'm surprised that children are scared of very small, harmless dogs, who would be kept away from them. Where did they get this fear from?

Allergies, yes. But why accept in the first place.

Well done OP. You have done the right thing. It’s so rude of them to dictate what happens in your home over Christmas, or any other bloody day!

All they had to do was decline politely rather than try to bully you into submission.

Stand firm!

Yes, out of you and the OP it’s definitely the OP with social inadequacies on display here 😂

Your house your rules! If they can’t cope with the dog then they don’t come. Simple as that!

He sounds really cute!! My child has actually been a victim of a dog bite (to the face) by a friends Daschund that had anxiety issues and bit my child when they were running through the house. We would still happily attend your Christmas and just maybe ask that they be introduced gently and that your dog not jump up (but sounds like he’s calm and not an issue). Your cousin is being mad!

Peanuts are the packaging peanuts to protect items from damage. They’re called peanuts because they’re a bit like peanuts. Not actual peanuts.

Tell them to not come then OP. They sound hard work, and how dare they dictate to you in your own home. You’ve been clear from the start. Sounds nasty them getting other relatives to wade in to get them on their side. Send one text to all to clarify dog will be in the house at Xmas, and the ones who don’t mind still come, but suggest the two main complainers should merge together for Xmas and host at their place.