AIBU to be furious?

[havasack]

On Thursdays I meet my childminder at the school gates to hand over my 1 year old while I’m picking up my 6 year old.
We had a brief chat and then she said (in front of a few other people) she’d seen we’d been away at the weekend and that ‘maybe I should pay my childcare bill before I book holidays’. Three people turned around and I was bright red in the face. How unprofessional!
For context - payment was due Monday and she’s sent me no reminders which she usually does after 2/3 days then I always pay! I’ve never not paid.

I’m thinking of transferring to a nursery as there may be more professional boundaries in place. She should not have mentioned that in front of others. AIBU?

If someone is on a low salary a few days makes a huge difference.

When I was minimum wage by payday I'd have like 7p in my bank account. Now I employ people I'd never pay them even an hour late.

Set up a standing order like a grownup. She was right to call you out.

Surely you know when the bill is due and should just pay it without having to be reminded? Setup a standing order

Good for her in calling you out, she has a business to run

OMG you are the absolute worst. Please stop whatever you are doing and look after your own kids if you don't want to treat the people who look after them for you with respect.

I think that often people on good salaries don't understand what it's like for other people. Being even a few £ down can make all the difference.
I've heard from cleaners and childminders how thoughtless well off people using their services can be.

In front of others was unprofessional but she has a fair point. She is a one-person business and likely relies on income from you to pay basic things like her utility bills. No matter whether you choose a childminder or nursery, you will get late fees and potentially your contract terminated. Lots of other CMs and nurseries won’t allow your child in if you haven’t paid your last bill

Agree. I wondered if it was a wind up once the updates appeared and confirmed the reality of the situation. l simply can’t believe anyone could lack self awareness to this extent.

do you pay everyone a few days late every time or is it just her?

Maybe she was advertising that she’ll have spaces for new clients soon 🤣

You’re also messing up any benefits she may be claiming. If she has to claim UC as a top up, and you pay on the wrong dates then you could leave her below the minimum threshold one month, so she ends up short of money because they won’t pay any extra to her, and then her income the next month will be higher due to your payment coming in plus all the actual payments for that month, so she loses out on UC.

Stop being so selfish and pay your bills on time. I’m sure you get paid on pay day?

You are so in the wrong. Entitled, too and no understanding that people need to be paid on the same day each week/month. You are showing a lack of respect as your failure to pay on time suggests that the money isn’t important to her and she’s earning pin money or spending money. I suspect she said it in front of other people because you have pushed her too far and she’s sick of it. I would be.

She has earned it waiting on her mo ey. For all you know she was penalised for missing paymentts, or going hungry. Paying 10 days late is disgraceful. Of course she is entitled to suspend care if she is not being paid.

To be honest, I think the clue is on the username - "havasack". I bet you do.

You shouldn’t ever be paying late. Yabu, but doubt you’ll come back to the thread, since you came thinking she was the one who was BU. You’re a CF, to be honest.

Does your mortgage or rent have to send you a reminder? Does your holiday payments? Or just the person who you trust to watch your child?

You are absolutely totally unreasonable. Why do you ‘usually’ wait until she reminds you before you pay. A good childminder is priceless and you are taking the p. If you are working how would you feel if your emloyer did not pay you each week/month until you reminded them to pay you? Yes, exactly!

Can't believe how lacking some people are in self awareness. You have repeatedly paid late to the post she threatened to remove your child from her list, instead she introduced a late payment fee which you have racked upp £100 through. Then have the audacity to claim she hasn't earned it! She has earned as you haven't paid her on time.

Yoo clearly know the day payment is due why not set up a direct debit? Why should she have to spend her time chasing your for the money she is owed?

Did it ever occur to you she relies on that money to pay her bills? You deserved to be embarrassed for your treatment of her.

Ex childminder here. People like you are the reason I had to give up a job I loved.
Breezy 'Oh I'll pay on Monday.'
'I forgot to go to the bank.'
'I forgot.'

I didn't forget to pay my insurance. I didn't forget to feed your child or forget to pick up from school.
Set up a standing order and stop being such an ass @havasack
She hasn't cost you £100, YOU cost you that.

This ⬆️, absolutely.

She's right then. YABU.

But you shouldn't be late paying her at all OP. Late payment can really screw up the finances for a self-employed person. I do think she was inappropriate bringing it up where/when she did, but this is mostly on you imo.

(ETA: good grief OP, I hadn't rtft when I posted the above, but you are absolutely taking the piss. I wouldn't blame her at all if she withdrew her services.)

Hahaha, this is a wind-up isn't it?

If not then no wonder you've not come back to this thread and I hope you get your arse handed to you. By the way, a nursery won't stand for a late payment, in fact you will probably pay in advance. Bet your childminder won't be sorry to lose you at all.

She should have followed through. You're acting unbelievably entitled.

I don’t think op will be back. I also don’t think she’s going to have a dawning realisation that actually, she is at fault.

so you are a regular late payer? I’d be sacking you as a client. Utter entitlement.

So the £10 a day late fee is for late payment or late paying the bill. And if she’s had £100 from you then you’ve been late 10 times.

Anyway, I’m guessing this is a reverse, no one could be this bloody minded, surely.