Most toxic site ever!!!!

[emilyinlondonx]

I swear this site has reached peak toxicity. Even if someone posts about having a genuinely amazing spouse or a happy marriage, there’s a wave of people ready to tear it apart. It’s insane.
Even if your partner supports you, protects you, or has your back, that’s somehow “wrong” and people will immediately find a way to twist it into something negative. It’s projection 101... if they’re miserable in their own marriages, they have to make everyone else miserable too. And that seems like a very common theme on this app.
I wrote a post about how my husband cut off his mum and one of his siblings because of their treatment of me. But apparently, because he still has contact with a different sister - whose only issue is that she kept pressuring him to contact their mum (and stopped when he threatened to cut them off) but has now resorted to indirect posts- I somehow have a “toxic husband” and people feel the need to wish me luck in my “miserable life.”
It doesn’t matter what the issue is - finances, family drama, literally anything - people will find a way to blame the spouse, because deep down, they’re depressed and bitter about their own lives and need to drag everyone else down with them.
I didn’t think it was possible, but this site is even more toxic than Reddit. Every day it’s just sadness, negativity, and people trying to make you feel bad for having a life that actually works. I am not just talking about myself, I see bullying of others on here every day. No wonder the next generation is f**ked. Honestly, it’s exhausting, demoralising, and depressing just to read some of these comments.

I went on today to ask advice from an older person's point of view about a subject. Within in 3 replies I deleted the post. Vicious unkind and just plain rude. Its like there are a group of wonen just waiting to pounce.

It’s not unlike politics OP - there is a tendency these days for unhappy struggling people of whatever political persuasion to want to actually cause fiscal and mental harm to those in a different position and bring everyone to the same level - I’m a centreist voter, I am perfectly happy to state that - but from the right I saw it in subjects like Brexit - ‘well if it pisses you off/damages your business/ wipes the smug smile off your face - that suits me fine’ and from the very left too, begrudging anyone who has done well and worked hard/sold businesses/ got a nice home etc - this site in recent times can often have those tendencies to bring down anyone asking for quite simple opinions- yes there are arseholes out there, but it’s all sexes and all ages- not just men to be honest and there’s an awful lot of man hating going on for often some relatively harmless thoughtless but irritating behaviour

How did you do that when we can’t delete our own posts?

I have just gone back on to find the post still there !!!!!
I thought i had found a delete button....but sadly no.
Ive "reported to the moderators and asked them to take it down. I can't face much more attacks at the moment.

My question was quite innocent, not even an opinion. I just asked if by buying a lovely bedding set for my 2 year old godchild I might be interfering as her mother does not want her in a bed yet. Ive explained it can wait but I got put through a shredder, keep your nose out etc.

Can you link?

Yep - I honestly think there are sone absolute fruitcakes out there determined to see conflict and drama in the most innocent of situations- I had a friend many years ago who wasn’t happy unless her life was a drama fest like Eastenders- when it all got a bit samey she treated conflict - suspect some mumsnetters are the same

What you described are what is expect from a site predominantly containing women. Women have a tendency to be bitchy in a way that men just don’t.

The reason the other sites have more sexual and violent content is almost certainly because men frequent them far more than they do MN.

Men and women typically have different faults (though of course we can’t generalise this to the individual).

Just don’t open the thread… no one is forcing you to read what’s on there.

It's 4Chan for incel women. However, as with all forums, most people are quite reasonable, but of course the most toxic posters get the most reaction.

Since AI, it’s got worse

Well, we need our space too. You've already got incel and MRA Reddit, can't you leave a little spot for us without colonising it? By the time you guys are finished, we won't have any space left for the threads on love potions and cauldron buyers' guides.

Has it got worse? Absolutely. But the most toxic, when we have websites like Pornhub profiting from rape and child abuse, or incel and red pill forums etc? No, not even close and you need some perspective.

Some teachers say that “girl bullying is worse than boy bullying”. Not my words; they say boys might have a scrap which is forgotten the next day, but girls bear long grudges.

Agreed. Whilst I have seen some lovely replies and support, I have also seen the opposite. I also find MN to be really oddly judgemental about quite benign things.

Unhappy people, and there are many on the net, never give the best opinions and advice. 🤷‍♀️

Well thats a very silly thing for a teacher to say, isn't it? Because how can they possibly know if the victim would prefer to be physically assaulted or be subject to a drawn out falling out?
People often trot this sort of thing out to argue women and girls are as bad/worse than boys and men, suggesting thatphysical violence is the preserve of male, and is somehow less harmful than emotional attacks, which are meant to be the preserve of females. Not only is that highly subjective, but also fails to recognise that males are emotional bullies as well as being multiple times more likely to be violent, not instead of.
I wonder if your teacher friends have stopped to consider that the boys get over it quicker because one boy has simply flexed his muscles and the other come into line through fear.