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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Misunderstood Xmas gift

626 replies

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 10:42

Just for fun, what have you given as a Christmas present that totally fell flat and was misunderstood? My bad idea was a box of luxury crackers. It was some yrs ago, late 80s. Very cheap crackers were the norm and the luxury sort were more of a rarity. So I bought a box for my sister. She and her husband always had friends round on Boxing Day or NY Day, when she pulled out all the stops. The crackers would have graced any table. White with golden ribbons, they looked classy, and the items inside were so much nicer than the usual trinkets. Twice as expensive for half as many, it seemed the sort of thing many would like but would never justify buying. However, my sister decided that since nobody would give anyone crackers, they had to be intended just as packaging, so she proceeded to pull them all one after the other, and ended up with a pile of trinkets, albeit superior trinkets.

That's my best flop, but a close second is giving a friend a metal water bottle because she carried water in an old plastic lemonade bottle. So she now uses the bottle at home when the rest of us use glasses and carries on with her ancient plastic bottles outside.

OP posts:
Ilovepastafortea · 03/12/2025 17:41

Just been discussing this with DH.

DH commented that I'm good at buying people presents that they want 'just because' and don't wait until birthdays or Christmas. He said that shows my love far more than waiting until a special occasion for their present. He also commented that, as we get older, it's probably a good idea as we may not be here at Christmas.

For example, I was having a sort out of the loft. I found a load of slides from my MIL's house which were from the 1960's & featured DH, MIL & many people who are no longer with us. We had no way of viewing them so, last night I bought a viewer on Amazon which was delivered today. DH was over the moon & agreed that it was better to have the viewer today rather than wait until Christmas.

booknerdhead · 03/12/2025 17:41

Not for a special occasion, but I gave my mother a dark brown hair mascara as she got fed up with the grey coming through her dyed hair.
She looked unimpressed and said nothing. Later I asked her what she thought and she replied “You know I don’t wear eye makeup”.

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 17:44

booknerdhead · 03/12/2025 17:41

Not for a special occasion, but I gave my mother a dark brown hair mascara as she got fed up with the grey coming through her dyed hair.
She looked unimpressed and said nothing. Later I asked her what she thought and she replied “You know I don’t wear eye makeup”.

To be fair, I'd have thought mascara was for my eyes.

zingally · 03/12/2025 17:49

About 15 years ago, my best friend asked for a slanket (remember them?!)
Me being a cheap-arse, didn't buy her the branded one, but a knock-off from one of those "springs up for Christmas and is gone by January 6th" shops.
Back then, I wasn't super-aware that knock-offs would be inferior quality, so just thought I'd played the system and got a bargain.
She opened it up, and it was the cheapest, thinnest material ever. It was crap.
My friend, bless her, wrapped herself up in it and smiled and said thanks, but I was cringing inside. It undoubtedly went in the bin as soon as I left.
Needless to say, if people have asked for certain brands of stuff, if I can afford it, I'll get it.

alpenguin · 03/12/2025 17:50

I got this brilliant floppy fish torch thing as a joke present and got one for someone else. We worked together in a bar and always needed a torch so I was being practical and funny. I thought she’d get the joke but she was properly outraged. Never bothered getting her another present again. It’s one thing to be disappointed another to be full of rage. She got me a bar of soap!

ImFineItsAllFine · 03/12/2025 17:51

One year I ordered MIL a Christmas mug with photos of our 2 (baby and toddler at the time) DC on it.

She did seem to really like it but has declared it 'too special to be used in case it gets broken' and so it lives in its box at the back of a very high cupboard where nobody can see it. It wasnt even expensive. 😕

Calliopespa · 03/12/2025 17:55

ImFineItsAllFine · 03/12/2025 17:51

One year I ordered MIL a Christmas mug with photos of our 2 (baby and toddler at the time) DC on it.

She did seem to really like it but has declared it 'too special to be used in case it gets broken' and so it lives in its box at the back of a very high cupboard where nobody can see it. It wasnt even expensive. 😕

Edited

I am really bad at doing this. I totally get the lack of logic and am trying now to make myself embrace the item and accept the risk of losing it, but it is a genuine form of appreciation - if that helps!

IHeartJeff · 03/12/2025 17:55

Not really misunderstood, but in laws were involved in an attempted distraction burglary and asked for a ring camera. Last Christmas. They still haven’t put it up.

LittleCarrot12 · 03/12/2025 17:56

Idontpostmuch · 03/12/2025 14:23

My sister thought so too, and proceeded to tell everyone during a family dinner in January. She then proceeded to boast about how clever she'd been in realising she was supposed to pull them all at once. 😂

I've just realised you meant Christmas crackers. I was imagining posh crackers for cheese and the mess of them all being pulled out then box at once 😂

katseyes7 · 03/12/2025 17:59

DriveMeCrazy1974
I remember Bumble Balls! They were children's toys but we bought one for our border collies, after seeing one in a toyshop. We thought they'd chase it, both being good 'herders'.
The dog looked at it as if to say 'and what do you want me to do with that?'
Our bitch, however, went absolutely nuts when we switched it on. Jumping about, barking, and trying to bite it. It didn't last long.

Lovesabadboy · 03/12/2025 18:06

As a child about 10/11 years old I bought my mum a wooden spoon as part of her Christmas gift (she didn't just get a wooden spoon!), as she did a lot of baking and had somehow broken hers.

She then proceeded to give me the silent treatment for at least 2 days (yes, this did happen a lot throughout my childhood and teens) and I had no idea why.
I then found out that, apparently, giving someone a wooden spoon implies that they are a shit-stirrer!!
I had NO idea - how was I supposed to know that at 10 years old?!

WestwardHo1 · 03/12/2025 18:08

Luxury organic stretch mark cream for exSIL. I thought I was doing a nice thing. It would seem not

She never liked me anyway.

FestiveFruitloop · 03/12/2025 18:08

JohnTheRevelator · 03/12/2025 17:22

In tomato sauce? 😂

That was my assumption. 😂

IncessantNameChanger · 03/12/2025 18:09

When ds was 4, we bought him the usual things for Christmas despite him asking for a bike. Up to that point, he was happy with the box. Things came in and just a bit oblivious and enjoying ripping things open.

On Christmas morning, he shouted at us. "Where is my bike? I didn't ask for any of the stuff, I asked for a bike!!"

And he's been like that pretty much since but less rude about it 😅 I always thought it would be nice to have a child who knew their own mind. Until it happened. God bless him. He also used to shout out to random teens at the park "hey you there, yes you. Get over here and push me!" Poor teems was so shocked and dazed they came over and pushed him aged 3. He was a Strange toddler. I wonder if Putin was like him at 4?

Newname71 · 03/12/2025 18:13

perenniallymessy · 03/12/2025 15:12

I'm wondering if your son grew up to be the husband that ate the bird fat ball thinking it was an artisanal snack (post on here quite a while ago).

This has reminded me of when DH and I went to Miller and Carter for a meal. He was eating the cubed cheese that came in a little bowl complaining it was greasy and tasted horrible. Daft twat was eating butter!! 😂

SpaceRaccoon · 03/12/2025 18:16

oohyoudevilyou · 03/12/2025 17:22

My mum bought her Sil a lovely soft cream wrap, thinking it'd be nice for her to wear on cooler summer evenings. Sil took it completely the wrong way: Turns out they had struggled to conceive and were coming to terms with being childless. Sil never spoke to mum again as she took the gift to be a baby shawl and thought mum was being spiteful and rubbing their noses in their infertility.

My mum only found out years later after her Sil had told the whole family the story, from her viewpoint. Mum was heartbroken as she has no idea that they had been trying for a baby, and it had never occurred to her that the gift could be mistaken for a baby item. She tried to explain and apologise but her Sil refused to believe her

I really dislike people that make unwarranted bad faith assumptions like that. Your poor mum.

Ahfiddlesticks · 03/12/2025 18:16

perenniallymessy · 03/12/2025 15:12

I'm wondering if your son grew up to be the husband that ate the bird fat ball thinking it was an artisanal snack (post on here quite a while ago).

I remember that thread, it was hilarious!

PorridgeAndSyrup · 03/12/2025 18:17

Not that exciting, but when I was a student I lived in a really posh area, coming from a not very posh area myself, and there were loads of independent gift shops selling very lovely expensive things. So at Christmas I bought lovely luxury gifts for all my family (things like soaps, candles, gardening gloves, chocolates…), but my budget didn’t stretch as far as it would have at home so everyone’s gifts were much smaller than normal. On Christmas Day I realised no one realised that these gifts were Luxury and Expensive, they couldn’t tell the difference between them and anything you’d get in Boots or Wilko’s or the supermarket, so that aspect wasn’t appreciated at all, and it just looked like I’d been stingier than last year!

SarahAndQuack · 03/12/2025 18:17

WestwardHo1 · 03/12/2025 18:08

Luxury organic stretch mark cream for exSIL. I thought I was doing a nice thing. It would seem not

She never liked me anyway.

I bet she bloody doesn't!

Hons123 · 03/12/2025 18:18

Mine is a memory from ages and ages ago. A friend's family had a guest over Christmas from either Romania or Bulgaria, a visiting/exchange university academic. This guest presented a brand new mechanical watch in its box to the host, the watch was inscribed 'Made in the USSR'. The box was passed around and the host said 'Oh, my gosh, this is so very generous, far too generous, thank you so much'. The host's son, in his mid twenties, said, out loud 'of course it is easy for them to be generous, they live in a communist country, all the stuff is free to them'. This young man apparently received the best of school education in a major boarding school and then at a good university.

Lastfroginthebox · 03/12/2025 18:18

Aroundthebend · 03/12/2025 14:58

I bought my exH a colonic irrigation voucher for Christmas. When I went to the salon that did them, I asked for a voucher to wrap up and they said they didn’t do vouchers as they had never known them to be bought as a gift!
On Christmas Day I suggested we opened our presents before our parents arrived…he insisted we all opened our presents together… he wasn’t impressed when he did open his as he then had to explain what was involved to his parents!

Edited

Talk about rogue presents! This beats fancy crackers hands down. I note he's your ex...

iSage · 03/12/2025 18:19

A bit of a sad one - one November, we were visiting my parents with our dog, and he stole a chicken pie from my dad's plate - no great harm done, we had a laugh about it.

Come Christmas I thought it would be funny to buy my dad a chicken pie as a present 'from the dog' - I knew he would find it really funny.

I duly did so, but he was baffled when he opened it. He had completely forgotten the incident. It was about this time we realised he was developing dementia. I explained it to him, and we had a belated and half-hearted laugh about it but it was so disappointing to think that as little as a year earlier he would have roared with laughter.

LakieLady · 03/12/2025 18:21

NoKnit · 03/12/2025 14:25

Not quite giving but receiving. A gift I received was what I thought was homemade bath salts so I used them in the bath. I later discovered they were actually a spice mix for steaks/pork chops etc. I felt like a bit of a wally when I found out.

😂😂😂

But did they make you taste nice?

Nolieinforme · 03/12/2025 18:22

Last year we gave one of those large circular candles with 3 wicks to another couple the weekend before Christmas, it was wrapped with a bow on top. They commented that it looked like a whole stilton, and as they left my husband jokingly said "don't forget to put it in the fridge when you get home" ha, ha.

On Christmas Eve they received a last minute invite to her sister's house who said "bring something for the buffet". You've guessed it, they grabbed the still wrapped large candle from their fridge and proudly placed it in the centre of the buffet table, surrounded by biscuits and other smaller pieces of cheese. When it was time to eat, her sister unwrapped it and apparently wasn't very amused - however we thought it was hilarious when we were told - we know the sister too!!!

Fluffyblackcat7 · 03/12/2025 18:22

NoKnit · 03/12/2025 14:25

Not quite giving but receiving. A gift I received was what I thought was homemade bath salts so I used them in the bath. I later discovered they were actually a spice mix for steaks/pork chops etc. I felt like a bit of a wally when I found out.

Bet you smelled nice though. Good enough to eat!

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