DH kicking off as I want to uninvite DMIL/DSIL from Christmas Day

[Christmasdayissue]

NC’d for this. Please can people let me know if they think IABU.

Background - DH and I recently moved into our own home after renting for years and having limited space.

Yesterday we hosted DMIL and DSIL for a roast. Both have stomach problems - fine. However, they spent the hour following the roast sat in our living room openly breaking wind and making no attempt to hide this fact. In front of our two young DC (both found it hilarious). No apology from either of them, the only acknowledgment being ‘well you know we have stomach issues and eating that makes it flare up’.

DH didn’t say anything to them. When I told him after they left that I found it disgusting, he said I was prudish and that they can’t help it. I asked why they couldn’t leave the room. He said it’s good they feel at home and he grew up with them being like that so doesn’t see the issue.

I’ve told him today I don’t want them to come on Christmas Day as planned if that’s how they will behave, and set such an awful example to our DC. He said how dare I threaten that and if I ever thought that was appropriate then he’d simply go out for lunch with them to a pub instead.

Op has said they behave when at a restaurant so clearly they have an element of control, unless we are led to believe they only ate non fart causing foods

What utterly disgusting and disrespectful people. Yes, it might be hilarious 'once' but continually? Come on. Kids do stuff like that, not grown adults. Maybe ask for a list of their “intolerances” going forwards. Christmas Day however, I’d be lacing all their food with laxatives if it was me…at least all “farts” will be in the bathroom!

Could you text and say something you know that Sunday’s roast upset their stomachs- what would be better for them at Christmas?

You can still prepare what you want for the rest of your family, but if certain foods/seasonings set them off, they can tell you and you can make sure that certain dishes don’t include them.

For goodness sake, passing wind is perfectly normal - on average it’s 15 times a day, but the range is 5-40. If you have dietary intolerances or swallow air when you eat it or have other GI issues, it can happen without any warning.
Just grow up, laugh and open a window or blame it on the dog.

It's fucking grim behaviour, and just so disrespectful.

Just giggle with the children. Your children will completely understand when and where it is inappropriate to fart.

Absolutely disgusting for two grown women to sit breaking wind in someone else’s home like two; two drunken dockers; quite how your husband finds it acceptable is beyond comprehension; I’m totally with you about Christmas just the thought of having them there would make me feel sick; do you have other family visiting ? Your family maybe if so I’d forewarn them & ask them to voice their disgust as early in the day as possible in tge hope they pack up & go home through sheer embarrassment as for your husband would he be happy for you to start breaking wind whilst he’s sat watching tv with you & for the children to be rolling around laughing at it… it would ware thin very quickly it’s not an attractive trait so why us it acceptable for his mother & sister to do it in your home… it isn’t it’s gross & so very wrong

Really grim - like sharing your home with a pair of medieval peasants. Nobody wants to smell the contents of someone else's bowel in an enclosed space.

Of course farting is natural, so is defecation & urination.

In a civilised society, all 3 should only take place in a toilet

It's a bit annoying but you can't seriously be considering going no contact with them for farting too much?

Unfortunately my family aren’t visiting over Christmas so it’s just me, DH, DC and DMIL/DSIL who are both single.

He says he wouldn’t care if I behaved the same, thankfully I am very rarely ‘gassy’ and in the event I am, I retreat to the bathroom whether I have company or not.

If you have to accommodate cos he pays more of the mortgage and you’ve to do as your told tell him he’s cooking then. Or will he say no I pay more so you’ve to do it like his fragile man ego will break if he does.

so bloody what if he pays more.
this is 2025 not 1950 ffs and also why the hell doesn’t he know how to cook there is YouTube for that if stuck.

as for his mother and sister they can behave in a restaurant but not in the your home they know what they are doing.

I’ve tried re. him cooking believe me, he just laughs it off as some absurd suggestion. He grew up with a father who wouldn’t lift a finger in the kitchen either so that’s who I blame.

That.

and IF they dare fart… your very disapproving look in their direction will be the cherry on top of the dairy cake!

So just don’t do it.

Let him see you are serious. He wants to host his mum and sister. He can host.

Don’t book a delivery slot for Christmas Eve, don’t add Christmas dinner items to the shop. Let it sink in to him.

Don’t let your children be raised with him acting the same as his dad.

This comment/solution for the win 💯😂👏🏽

This 👍

And what of his mother in this

now I have to ask did he ever live alone

Have a good talk with your children, tell them it's very bad manners to fart at the dinner table. Dó explain a fart is not only "air", you might get a medical-encyclopedia or such to make it absolutely clear for the children what they will not only hear and smell but also breathe in. Don't forget a thorough description of underwear after an evening of farting. You have some time left to totally disgust them about their grandma's and aunt's behaviour.

They're both single? I'm shocked!

What a prince of a man. I would be gifting myself the joy of being single this Christmas.

Laugh back at him. Tell him you won't be cooking. You may not be able to stop them coming. But you dont have to cook for them. He's testing you.

That's his mam and sister. Unless they're abusive people then you can't block them from Xmas because they farted in your living room. And actually, good on him for not allowing you to invite them.

You’re being unreasonable. The kids found it funny & would probably enjoy the day even more with them around.