Differences between college and school I've got one in each I can't believe the difference ?

[CollegeVschool]

I've got one daughter in school doing a levels and my son is in college doing a course both want to go to uni.

I'm really shocked by the difference we don't get a parents evening at college and they are told we only get your parents in if there is an issue. There have been no discussions or help to see how he can improve ? He seems to be doing ok but it's hard to tell. When I emailed to ask how he's doing I didn't feel secure that the person I spoke to knew him well or his work?
By contrast my daughters school still has parents evening for everyone and she's doing really well and there are no concerns but it's really nice for her to have that time to get praise and they get reports ? Why would they do it differently in a college ?

With my daughter I know where she is at for her course and the exams .
I feel college is so much more removed than the school and at the school they know her much better.

We were also told in my daughters school how UCAS works and there was an information evening about it . They see their references and sign them off. At the college we have had no information about it and they don't show my son the reference !
This is not necessarily a criticism but I'm just wondering why the stark difference .

My dd had parents evenings in her 6th form college.

I had twins with one in each. I found exactly the same as you- shocking how poor the college was in comparison

I thought this was to be expected.

They are inherently different. College is supposed to be more grown up. More freedom, less spoon feeding, less parental involvement.

College teachers get paid less and teach long hours.

I'm paid for 7.4 hours a day. I'm teaching or moving between classrooms / sites for 6.5 of those. I get 45 minutes unpaid lunch (which i mainly work through)

Twice per week I get 1.5 hours to plan 24 hours teaching, apply for exam access arrangements, write reports, mark work... quite often I'll have to cover an absent colleague in at least 1 of those slots.

150 student case load. I'd love to have time to see or email parents, sadly I don't.

There’s a difference between FE college and sixth form college. Sixth Form college teachers get paid basically the same as school teachers and have similar conditions and expectations - we do parents evenings, reports, close monitoring of homework, contact with parents etc. Entries on the system for missed lessons and catch ups sessions booked and so on. But in return we get paid well and good holidays. FE get paid just for the hours they work and less holiday, so I’d expect there to be less oversight and communication, not because they don’t care but because where’s the time and capacity to do all that?

There shouldn’t be a difference - I work in FE and our students have tutors who know them and support them with 1-2-1s.
We run parents evenings and progress panels - so it’s not that FE doesn’t do it on the whole, it’s just that the one you’re involved in doesn’t.

We get a bit more remission than @Mathsdebatorwitj 23 hours of contact a week, but the workload for FE lecturers is huge.

I work in a sixth form - we have five parents' evenings a year with everyone invited so it isn't universal. My own daughter's sixth form is the same as yours (although I'm OK with that in her case).

Could you request some feedback from the teachers or department managers? I have communicated with parents in this way fairly frequently in both roles.

That said, I suppose college traditionally is a little more remote from parents (as with my daughter's college).

My DD is at college and my DS did A levels at 6th form and I completely agree with you, I’ve never met any of her tutors and she’s in year 2 of her course and I’ve only spoken to her tutor once in all time. My DD is hardly in either, it’s supposed to be a full time course and she’s only in 2 days a week! She’s ended up getting a part time job to fill the days when she’s not in college as she was bored, she doesn’t seem to get much work she needs to do at home either. It’s all been a bit of a shambles really and in hindsight I wish she had stayed on at school to do A levels.

Ds went to FE college & we had parents evenings, albeit phone ones at first as it was 2020-21

20+ years ago, in my town, when I was 16 there were few Schools offering 16-18 education.
You had to leave and find a college. Definitely they have a hands off approach, you were basically just treated like an adult and had to do things for yourself. So it sounds normal to me.

We don’t have school sixth forms here at all - everyone goes to college for A-levels. It’s a much more grown up and hands off experience: no uniform, no requirement to be on site all day, you can come and go as you please, no punishments. If you mess up you’re out, simple as that. There’s a lot of freedom but that comes with a lot of personal responsibility.

Yes, the parent involvement definitely drops off once they start college but the children are then being treated as adults who can manage their own work load and problems. We get a bursary but my daughter has to give permission for it to go into my bank account rather than hers - it is for transport and I still have to buy the super expensive bus pass for it so need the bursary to help cover this so it has to go into mine. College isn't compulsory in the way school is, even though they are still meant to be in education or training. We do get a couple parent evenings though in the year.

Yes I suppose it's supposed it's to be expected I just find it odd this wasn't mentioned at enrolment .maybe it's just something people know ?
Edited to add : im not very involved in my DD btw it's just we know more about her educational status and we know what support she has had with her UCAS etc.

I had a child in the late 2010s when I was only 16 so missed “year 12” and then went to college a year late. The behaviour shocked me, casual disrespect of the teacher, people just ignoring her and having loud conversations, getting up to go to the toilet whenever without asking, people pulling the mental health card when the teacher asked them to be quiet. Moaning and bitching about everything. It got better in year 2 when the flakers dropped out but it still was pretty shocking

My DS went to a really good college for A levels. They still did parents evening (online) and parents information nights where they talked to us about being their army to support the students to reach their potential. Every UCAS assembly we got too.

I felt it was a lot and unexpected but they get some of the best results in the UK for a state college and it clearly works.

DD on the other hand is at a local college and the communication is awful. She has dyslexia and a full support plan for exams but college don't appear to be putting this in place. Her first mock is Monday so we'll wait and see.

My son is at college doing a-levels and its phenomenal. Strikes an amazing balance between providing them with independence but letting you know of absences and any concerns. So its definitely not always the case. But I think the big city colleges that do a lot of vocational courses can be too hands off.

I am not surprised one bit. Though my experience is of young people at what would be described along the lines of @Downplayit city colleges. Usually young people who would probably not get the A level grades for a university.

It depends on the college. My daughters texts me about lessons missed if she is ever sick and had parents intro evening so all work as a team. It seems you will have to take all the initiative with the college. There are loads of science teachers on YouTube etc to help him better understand his subjects and it’s useful your daughters school gives you the heads up for both of them. If you show as a parent you’re interested, then the teachers will be too if you email them x

I don't even think this is a school/college difference, but more an individual setting difference.
My DC's school sixth form was similar to your college experience - they expect the students to take responsibility for themselves and only really get in touch if there is an issue. I think this is a better approach to be honest - it needs to be a bridge between school and whatever they do next, or the next stage will be a shock. I just think it takes some acclimatising as a parent.

I went to college for A levels 30 years ago and there was no parental input. You signed yourself up, managed own schedule, if you didn't turn up to lectures that was on you.

It was a great preparation for university.

When I was 16 I had decided to stay on in 6th form. All sorted out for it, enrolled, classes booked into etc etc.

I got there for the induction day and when I learned that you had to be in school from 09:00-1515 every day whether you had classes or not, and still had to wear the uniform, I thought 'fuck this' walked out on the first break, straight on the bus to the city, walked into a college and said 'Hey up, any room left on X and Y A Levels? 😂

They are inherently different. No spoon feeding, expected to be 'adults' to an extent.

And I was in 4 days a week, only 3 hours each day-the rest of the time I got a job and earned money. No brainer for some kids I imagine.

Expected to be adults but when I was at college they sure as fuck didn’t act like adults. Bitching and moaning when the teacher asked them to be quiet and constantly talking about their mental health.

At the time I put it down to “times changing” because I had a years maternity leave and started college at 17 instead of 16, as if anything could have changed that much in one year😂

Don’t people choose to go to college precisely because of the differences between college and school? You don’t get parents night etc if you were at college studying for a hairdressing or plumbing qualification. And you don’t get parents night at university.

Maybe in some places but there are entire counties where school stops at 16 so it’s not like there is a choice (unless you go private I suppose).

My DD16 went from all girls private school to state 6th form college. The one she is in the tutors are very accessible and do regular updates.