Mum asked to stop breastfeeding a TWO YEAR OLD in shoe shop.

[GinaDavva]

Mixed feelings with this one. Shaming a mother publicly breastfeeding a small baby is never acceptable but breastfeeding a two year old child in a shop? Surely at that age a bottle is more convenient in the middle of a shop? My first thought was that this was more about attention than the actual principle of the matter. After breastfeeding 3 of my own I can honestly say there has never been a time where it felt necessary to start breastfeeding any of mine in the middle of a shop at two years old. Frankly at that age they wouldn’t find much in mine anyway!

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cj3z31jn7v1o

And it is BS a child of 2 does not require breast feeding. There is no evidence to support it.

This is disgusting and says everything about you and your warped ideas and nothing about mothers and their children

Um yes there is extensive evidence, hence why the WHO recommends it.

The info on gov.uk points out the limitations of the survey you referenced @Tiddlyswink . It is stated that 'studies after 12 months are of low quality and contradictory and acknowledge that they do not take account of other foods and drinks being consumed'.

Still it is good to be as fully informed as possible and decide whether it is safer to stick to juice, cows milk and snack bars instead.
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/breastfeeding-and-dental-health/breastfeeding-and-dental-health

This info also refers to the very low levels of BF in the UK. I am not sure it is the most responsible thing to be doing, to post on a parents' site like this in a way that risks further discouraging BF. And that goes for a lot of posters on this thread.

Isn't there?

British Medical Journal (and hundreds other) disagrees.

‘Surely you’re not still breastfeeding’: a qualitative exploration of women’s experiences of breastfeeding beyond infancy in the UK | BMJ Open https://share.google/Go6YpCh1hicMznvtW

The seats are for customers!
I wouldn't sit and have a drink in a shoe shop. As someone who breastfed a 2 year old, there is absolutely no need to do it whilst shopping. A 2 yr-old is breastfed for nutritional/emotional reasons, but hunger. Once a child is on food, there is no need to randomly do it. A café is fine but a shoe shop has limited space.

Exactly.

there is a time and a place

Under a shroud, in a large cardboard box, in a back room, amirite?

Don't forget the coveted breastfeeding toilet! Complete with overflowing sanitary/nappy bin and empty soap dispenser.

What I'm genuinely curious about is why you think a snapshot second of seeing a mother breastfeed a 2 yo is enough to make ANY sort of judgement on that mothers parenting skills?

I'm sure there are loads of times where she's been unable to respond immediately and child has had to wait such as driving the car, carrying bags, going to the loo the list is endless. Why is it that you think that teeny window makes you more informed about what her child needs, than her? The mother is the best placed person to decide whether breastfeeding is the right comforting tool in her kit at that moment in time. And there may be lots of reasons which have been stated ad infinum about what those might be. So it's incredible to me that you would immediately assume she's an ill equipped parent as opposed to a parent making an informed choice using significantly more information than you are privy to.

Extended breastfeeding in the UK happens more than you'd think but due to attitudes like yours women often feel the need to hide it away. And other countries are capable of doing their own research. You still have yet to provide any evidence to back up a single assertion you've made.

@tiddlyswink https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4365917/

Here is the link to the research from Brazil which shows correlation not only between breastfeeding and level of educational attainment but also correlation between length of time being breastfeed and increased level of educational attainment compared to those breastfed for under 1 year.

Also I've worked in a shoe shop before. We had customers breastfeed there all the time, especially when in with other kids getting shoes fitted etc as that can be time consuming. Sometimes we'd have customers wait an hour just queueing for a back to school shoe fitting before we even got to the fitting which could be however long it took. Never ever would it have been an issue. Parents often brought snacks for their kids to keep them quiet.

She was out with her 8 yo, there's nothing to suggest they were not customers or would be customers. Lots of places have limited space like buses or similar and I've managed to breastfeed on plenty of those without it being an issue.

I dont think that’s a revolutionary concept ..obviously many people believe otherwise ( poll is currently 55 to 45 %) but if we repeated that poll considering a BF child at age 3 or at age 4 you would likely see that percentage change, I highly doubt many would believe a child of school age should still be BF on demand . So ultimately the debate is at what age is it considered the norm to stop BF on demand .

This. To me its nothing to do with breasts being "sexualised". More the ickyness of anyone sucking on a body part. To me there is something in our brains that doesn't find it icky when a baby mouths a toy but its clearly a bit gross when a 3 year old does. The age at which our brain thinks its an ok thing to see obviously varies but we clearly expect children to develop past a reliance on oral stimulation. For me by age 2 I'd completely understand bf continuing but in the transition to outgrowing it i would have expected it to have reduced significantly and no longer be a) the first choice during the day over offering a drink or snack (outside a shop in any case, you don't eat in a shop in my book) b) offered on demand because children this age should be learning to wait)/that they don't own mummy c) no longer the only or main source of comfort.

Again - none of your business. “Icky” ffs it’s totally to do with sexualising breasts. That’s what they are there for. Also, I hope you are spared the ghastly “icky” sight of neurodivergent or disabled kids who use chew fidget toys to literally be regulated enough to be in the world. Some of them are over 3 years old 😮. It would be very traumatic for you and no doubt provoke a further torrent of judgment 🙄🙄

The irony of a learned response (disgust) due to societal conditioning being suggested as innate, while suggesting an instinctive response (suckling at a breast) is portrayed as unnatural.

I can’t decide whether I am heartened by this thread due to the great responses from women defending extended breastfeeding and also, more importantly in my view, women’s right to do it wherever and whenever the need arises. Or whether I am thoroughly depressed by the fact that there is a debate about this at all. It’s about choice and about respecting choice. OK, you wouldn’t do it yourself, but is there any need to criticise another woman’s parenting skills or to use insulting language? If I was in a shoe shop and a child was running around knocking all the shoes off the shelf, while the parent sat scrolling through their phone, I might be entitled to an eye roll and maybe a bit of inward judgement. But someone quietly attending to their child’s needs? How the hell is that affecting me? And why would I jump to judgement about that woman’s entire repertoire of parenting skills about which I have no knowledge whatsoever?

I wouldn't find a 3 year old mouthing a toy "icky", especially as many children with additional needs have a sensory need to do so.

Absolutely this! I can't understand how some people refuse to see it.

This All. Day. Long.

Bravo

I suppose the real issue is why would anyone actually want a child with teeth latched on to their nipple? Surely it’s a bit uncomfortable?

They dont latch on with their teeth.

No, it isn't. Their mouth is shaped for breastfeeding. You can't even feel them. The shape of your mouth changes completely around the age of 6 or 7.

And babies have teeth at 6 months FYI. Their nutrition still comes from milk until 12 months.

I assume you are not a parent or you would know this stuff.

My third had 9 teeth by 9 months. Should I not have fed her?

Babies don't latch with their teeth and there's no hanging on to anything.

The real issue is why do people hate mothers and children so much?