Is it really a widely held belief that those who dislike animals are dangerous?

[Thesinisterone]

According to dh family it’s a valid concern ?!

I have never wanted pets, not keen on things like zoos or farm trips for the dc. I don’t like the smell of animals (plus I’m allergic to cats!). Really don’t like dogs (I’m scared of them!).

I dont hate animals I just don’t like them and avoid them as much as possible !

According to MIL this is a red flag and she thinks I could have a personality disorder as people who don’t like animals are ‘not quite right’. I did say to her that I just avoid animals it’s not as if I go round kicking puppies or anything ??!! She said ‘everyone agrees and we are all worried we’ve never known anyone who doesn’t like the dogs !’

Is it that strange ? They (dh family) and especially MIL seem very wary of me ??!

Not dangerous no! But as someone who would far rather spend time with animals than people I do find not liking them strange.

I don’t see it as any different to saying that you don’t like children. In both cases there’s a difference between not liking something and being actively cruel.

You're fine! She's a narrow minded idiot!

LuerLock

Id say one learned from the other- the first as a puppy would power towards me and leap up and head but me. It got more violent(😉) as he got bigger and then he would go into a sort of frozen pose so they started keeping him away. I felt so bad! Second is huge and would kill me if given the chance. I feel like a failure of a human being until I get home to my dude who acts like I’m the best in the world!

Disliking, no. Cruelty to, I’d say highly likely.

Not dangerous, but if my dogs seem to dislike you my spidey senses would be tingling. I've only ever had one dog (a lab I had years ago) have a weird reaction, to a friend of DH's. We didn't know it then, but she was right.

Yes there’s a strong correlation between hurting animals and going on to hurt/murder humans

fine not to like animals though!! Just as long as you’re keeping your hands to yourself 🫣

I don’t like animals but animals like me. Every dog I come across rushes up to lick me to death.

I found a puppy in a cardboard box in the middle of the road. I nearly ran it over. I put it in my car and eventually found the owner. The people I worked with were amazed because I don’t like animals. They seemed to think I would let harm come to them. Really I’m just a neat freak and don’t want them in my house.

Hitler was a massive dog lover, just saying

I think her attitude is more concerning, here is a study on Narcissists: Narcissistic Neuroticism was unrelated to human-centered empathy and positively related to animal-centered empathy and attitudes towards animals pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10098159/

I love wild animals, I do not like the concept of domesticated animals. Animals that have been bred and broken away from their normal wild natures.

I don't like cats or dogs. I feel so sorry for horses.

I don’t like animals inside. I like when they live outside, freely. I’ve walked out of many restaurants and coffee shops that allow pets, I think it’s unhygienic. Doesn’t mean I want to harm them, but don’t like living inside with them.

I mean if someone was going to be going round "I hate cats/dogs" or say did what my old neighbour did and set their dog on a cat in their garden I'd steer clear of them if it's more "I'm not keen on dogs/cats because I'm allergic/this happened and it made me scared" I'd have more understanding. For me I like well behaved dogs (and cats but I've never met an aggressive cat so far) as I was bitten by a miniature schnauzer and miniature poodle as a child (in the same incident) so I can be scared of dogs that aren't well behaved, I love a lovely calm well trained rottweiler that puppy can cuddle up and have fusses all day if they like but someone's yappy snappy chihuahua that the owners think it's funny because "they won't do any harm" they can keep that well away from me. I love cats though, had them all my life and I've never had a problem with one, they're usually quite good at walking away if they don't fancy a fuss.

Research has shown that children who are cruel to insects, i.e pulling wings of butterflies soon escalate to cruelty to cats/dogs and this behavipur most often manifests in cruelty towards people which can culminate in serious harm or murder. Its a massive red flag.

Animal abuse is not just the result of a minor personality flaw in the abuser—it is a symptom of a deep mental disturbance. Research in psychology and criminology shows that people who commit acts of cruelty toward animals rarely stop there and many of them move on to their fellow humans.

Op, has your mil got your dh a puppy for Christmas?

I never thought I'd have dogs and was mostly indifferent. Have lots now, the big lummocks. And def not indifferent:)

She’s being ridiculous.

I don’t really like animals in the sense that I don’t want a pet in my house, I have no desire to pet cats or dogs I come across, I’m not that interested in nature documentaries etc.
But I have no desire for them to come to harm (well, I do eat meat so obviously those animals come to harm. But I think a lot of people who claim to animal lovers also eat meat).

Just tell her Hitler was a dog lover

Your post and husband’s retort to your MIL gave me a good laugh and I now have the theme tune to Thundercats stuck in my head! Great to read your husband supports you about this.

I agree with previous posters, who have commented your MIL sounds like one of these dog owners whose life revolves around their dog and the dog is a human substitute. It does also sound like your MIL is using the fact you’re not fussed about animals to have a pop at you. She sounds insufferable.

YANBU. It’s perfectly fine to not be fussed about animals.
I’m not a dog person. Friends and family own them and I keep my distance as much as possible. I don’t like being jumped on. In most cases it reflects the owner hasn’t taken the time to train the dog properly. When I was younger most dog owner seemed to respect not everybody was fond of dogs and especially dogs jumping on them and would tell their dog off if it jumped on someone else. Why can’t we return to those days?

Some of the dogs that my friends/family own absolutely reek, so I get where you’re coming from on that point too. It’s another reason why I keep my distance.

P.S. Thundercats are loose. Thunder, thunder, thunder, thunder cats…

I wouldn't say I dislike animals but I don't want pets. I'm allergic to cats and not overly fond of domesticated animas in general. I do not think that's a red flag. That's ridiculous

I would go out out of my way to help any animal that was injured or suffering, but I'm very allergic to fur and feathers and have severe asthma, so have quite an eversion to being around them or being in the same room.

I don't think a lot of people understand or can relate to allergies to pets etc, and sometimes see me as being paranoid or awkward, so don't tend to say anything.

Dangerous? lol. No.

But as a person who loves animals, I have struggled with people who are aren’t really animal people and are cold towards them as we’re just so different.

If you were my DIL then I wouldn’t say anything because I would like to have a good relationship with my son and his wife in the future. As long as she wasn’t cruel to our animals or any other animals, and was good to my son, then I’d just avoid the topic of animals. Your husband needs to tell his mum to back off.

I think it probably comes from (and has then been Chinese whispered) a study that showed many sociopaths/murderers etc when analysed enjoyed killing small animals/insects as a child. My mates used to howl on nights out if we were approached as id just straight faced ask if they killed insects as a child....

Never heard anything like this before. Your DH's family are deranged.

My mum always told me to steer clear of people who dislike animals as “there’s something not quite right about people like that” - To be clear she was not talking about people who like them but don’t have any, she was referring to people who actively dislike them.

You’ve just said worse yourself!