To be frustrated by DofE requirements

[Frenchcremefraiche]

My daughter has just turned 15 and is trying to complete (well, START tbh!) her Bronze DofE.

On paper it's fine: learn something and do some volunteering.

In reality it's really, really hard! All suggestions appreciated!

There are so many exclusions to the skill requirement. She doesnt get home from school until 6 which limits evenings. Not that there are many lessons/groups after school anyway. Then there are so few activities that count as a skill on the weekend. Anything vaguely "sporty" doesnt count as a skill even if it's something she's never done before and is going to classes to learn it (eg ice skating). She's been doing online guitar lessons but because she started those before DofE, they dont count. There is a minimum hours requirement and Ive found a few in person classes but they arent long enough. It needs to be something in person because it needs to be signed off so teaching herself or doing something at home wont count.

Then volunteering, because of her age, very few places can help. Any informal groups that are willing to take her want a parent present because they cant take responsibility for her / arent DBS checked etc which I get but obviously she doesnt want me hanging about. It has to be a regular thing so she cant organise eg an afternoon litter pick. Plus she needs someone to sign it off anyway. She looked at helping at a local beaver/scout group but one said no and the other has her ex boyfriend helping so she said no. In her naive 15year old way she wont help at brownies because they are "sexist".

Any suggestions on what she can do? She's on the verge of having to quit because she cant meet the requirements.

I agree it can be hard!

Sorry have not rtft so might be repeating.....

For the skill, a friend's daughter did an online photography course and that counted- maybe something like that could work?

For volunteering, maybe Oxfam, a food bank? The suggestion from pp of supporting an elderly neighbour is good too.

I agree with other posters, either the school is fantasising some very restrictive DofE rules, or the candidate is. My DC did DofE less than 2 years ago and did activities very similar to those suggested here (and discounted as unacceptable by the OP).

I run D of E at my school and your school are not interpreting the requirements correctly OP.

Quite possibly, yes but I'm not the one saying she can't do it - the OP is. I'm just coming up with possible explanations for why teaching herself might be more of an issue.

I've already said she could ask a music teacher at school to do similar to you suggest.

I very much doubt the school are being deliberately obstructive unless they've never done it before and are being overly cautious.

This is a nationally recognised award that's been running since the 1950s. It hasn't really changed.i did it 30 years ago, my children did Bronze and Silver in the last 10 years.

There's a reason why no.one else has had a problem with it and no one else has. And it's unlikely to be the Centre running it.

Especially as the OP said something about her daughter being an Explorer Scout and the Scout Association also run DofE and deliberately organise opportunities for young people to achieve it.

Both my children continued with their music for the bronze. They’d been learning for years and put forward working towards next exam which was acceptable. As for volunteering, that was problematic at that age as no one seemed to want to support it. In the end my eldest did something in his attached junior school and the local church supported my youngest (we’re not even remotely religious or church goers but they were willing to support this).

I work for a charity and we have DoE kids volunteer with us on weekend mornings and they are very welcome. Try your local charities, food banks etc

This is what my dd did. Put returned books away.

@Frenchcremefraiche have you actually gone on to the DofE website? There are loads of resources and information on how to do the qualification. If she is doing it through her school and it is them being so obstructive then tell her to do it though Explorers as she already does that. She could do her young leaders training through them as well. She needs to think outside of the box a bit and not just hope to get a volunteering role in a charity shop etc. Why cant she organise a weekly litter pick herself. Our local council will lend the litter picks and give bags etc to anyone wishing to do it. She could organise it with a couple of friends or even family members. Her Explorers leader would probably sign that off if she provided evidence of having done it.
Why can't she get a park run under her own steam wither by cycling or using public transport? She could organise a food bank drive through her school. Get in touch with food banks and they will e able to advise. You said she asked to volunteer reading to kids in the library and they said no. They are unlikely to want a 15 year old doing that but they may have other tasks she could do. The whole point of DofE is to build skills and resilience. Being able to use your own initiative to set up things and organise is all part of it. To be honest either the school is being difficult or your daughter is stretching the truth a little with regard to what is allowed.

DC1 volunteered at our local junior park run and I’ve suggested it to other local mums who were also looking for places their 15yr olds could volunteer (always seems to be the mums that do all the looking?!) and they’ve subsequently reported back that it had worked out well for them/their kids.

I don't see why online guitar lessons wouldn't count. She could set herself a goal of teaching a certain standard or learning a song or something. You just need to have someone who will sign off to say she did it.

DD did piano lessons (she was already doing it), sports club (again already doing it) for physical and she helped at brownies for Bronze. I don't understand why your dd thinks brownies is sexist - they aren't all doing housewife badges these days!!

For silver she did cooking and gave a sample each week to our neighbour/ child minder. She did an hour once a week at her old primary school helping one of the teachers doing photocopying, laminating etc.

DS also did music lessons, helped at scouts and for the physical did walking which was signed off by someone we know - he took photos as evidence he had done it.

It doesn't have to be exactly an hour every week - it can be averaged out.

Maybe you could reach out locally - are you a member of any Facebook groups where you could ask or do you do any activities that your dd could be part of?

Mine have done volunteering at a charity shop, helping younger children at school when they have a free, so asking a teacher with a lower ability group at that time if they can help, keeping school library tidy spending 20 minutes or so at lunch times, helping at the local sports club where they are a member to assist with a younger group.

Skills I did with them were cooking and crocheting. I couldn't sign them off but we made a folder with pictures of the recipes, ingredients and finished product and head cook at the school signed it off. Crochet taken in to school and a teacher who could crochet looked at the work and signed it off.

Good luck, it can seem hard getting started but I was just talking to GS yesterday about his gold DofE and he said it was one of the best things he's done.

Granny did it here.

@Frenchcremefraiche I assume you’re at a private school given the hours she’s spending at school, which means that it’s usually fairly straightforward to be able to complete bronze at least, because of all the extra curricular activities on offer. Have school not sent parents details of what’s expected? Ours sent a detailed email with requirements, and then deal with the signing off and expeditions etc. As parents, we haven’t had to get involved at all, apart from helping the kids decide what volunteering to do.

The DofE website gives loads of examples of what counts, and even gives examples of Duolingo and online music lessons. Either your daughter or school appear to have misunderstood the requirements. Are you sure your daughter actually wants to do it?

Pretty much all the pupils at our school do bronze at least and don’t seem to have a problem completing the volunteering. Charity shops do take 14 year olds (Oxfam and Barnardos even state this on their websites). Others have done deaf groups/libraries/helping at primary/Sunday school (even if they’re not religious) etc.

Yeah my kids didn't struggle at all so not sure why your daughter is having such a tough time.

Loads of volunteering places - some kids volunteered to help at their primary school or with the y7 kids sports at school. You can do a skill around sport - not sure where that came from unless they changed it? You can also do things on the weekends and helping coaches during training on the weekends counts.

And music lessons count if the music teacher can sign off and show progress. Honestly have you even checked the website which is really good and useful?

Sounds like she just needs to accept something rather than it being her preferred choice
or nothing.

I’d speak to the DoE coordinator.
Ask why these suggestions aren’t suitable. They seem to be a lot stricter than necessary.

I taught my GS to cook, I couldn't sign it off but we just produced the evidence and the head cook at school very kindly checked the evidence and signed it off.

Apologies if this has already been suggested, online voluntary work, my son did this:
www.missingmaps.org

So there are smelly charity shops? If YOU are willing, she could be an offsite volunteer who takes the clothes home and washes and irons them. I used to run charity shops and would have LOVED that offer.

She (DD) doesn't seem to have considered thinking outside the bos and creating opportunities for herself (thought - if she's never ironed before, this might well count as a skill, too, if you can get the shop leader to sign it off).

@Frenchcremefraiche

I don’t know but shes been told and has double checked.

You can definitely have learning a musical instrument as a skill. It sounds like the people running the award are being really awkward. You don’t have to do an in person skill. They just need evidence which someone can verify. And as long as it’s not family member or one of their mates it should be ok.

Which schools finish at 530, don't have music in the curriculum and offer no volunteering opportunities?!

My DD did volunteer reading in school, her skill was her weekly Drama lessons and her physical was dog walking signed off by my friend.

Who told you the skills and activities have to be something new?
I don't think that's correct as my kid did Bronze based on music lessons and a martial art they were already doing.

Volunteering, my kid and friends have done various things - it doesn't necessarily have to be weekly if they do a longer session fortnightly or monthly for example:

Joining a community garden project
Visiting a care home
Helping out at a church youth club
Litter picking

Could your DD learn a new piece or song on her guitar every week and perform it to a teacher and group of students at school?

Any informal groups that are willing to take her want a parent present because they cant take responsibility for her / arent DBS checked etc which I get but obviously she doesnt want me hanging about.

And

She looked at helping at a local beaver/scout group but one said no and the other has her ex boyfriend helping so she said no.

And

In her naive 15year old way she wont help at brownies because they are "sexist".

And

Any suggestions on what she can do? She's on the verge of having to quit because she cant meet the requirements.

Even you admit, some of this is about her attitude rather than the DofE requirements.

What suggestion can you make? That if she really wants to achieve something / do something she needs to show maturity and not put additional self made barriers to a problem she's already struggling with.

If she's not in a position to be picky, she can't be picky.

I do get the wider issues with the scheme and do think its problematic and leans to who you know rather than being an opportunity for all but I also think theres an element here of making her own life more difficult too.

Part of the point of the scheme is to go out and find something as part of the award is about having that get up and go to do that. Its about using iniative rather than just having every easily set up for you.

I generally think if you want to do it, you can find something somewhere.

Lots of companies do online cooking courses which sign it off for you. Both my DC did this for Bronze.