To not understand people who talk about being the first in their family to go to uni like it’s a badge of honour?

[Kyrgyzstan]

Sorry if this sounds dismissive of their achievements but isn’t it less of a rags to riches tale of personal achievement and more of a generational difference? I mean barely any of our parents generation went to university and now it’s pretty much expected if you want a half way decent job.

Obviously if you were raised by heroin addicts and managed to still get good grades and go off to uni that’s different but the children of ordinary parents who just didn’t go to university talking about it like a huge achievement sounds a little strange to me?

Starting a thread saying “a degree is nothing special, I could totally have got one if I even wanted one, which I definitely don’t, because it’s not even an achievement” is the only strange thing here. People are just reacting to your strangeness.

• It’s a rather large chip. Possibly visible from space.
• I see that numeracy isn’t a strong point of yours, either.
• I suspect you’re trolling because it’s a bit unbelievable that anyone could be quite this obtuse, for such a sustained period of time, in the face of so much evidence that they’re wrong, from so many people.

Good night, OP. I wish you and your insecurities sweet dreams of besting all those silly stuck up people who think they’re better than you.

I’m mid twenties tons of people my age went to uni, no mention of whether their parents went or not (although I assume many didn’t because not many did back then) I’ve only ever seen it mentioned and made into a big thing on mumsnet, hence this thread pondering it.
Maybe I was a little dismissive in my op and first few posts of people’s feelings/experiences on this but as I’ve NEVER heard it mentioned in real life I was a little emotionally detached from it

You spend hours insulting me and I point out you’re insulting me and that means I have a chip? Ok then. Good night to you too

You're certainly a decade behind on your career, but you might not necessarily be reporting to someone younger - and that can happen at any stage of your career.

My late husband was the first in his family to go to university: his parents had an agricultural/labourer/estate worker background and had high hopes for him, but his headmaster's dismissive comment was "I don't see him in a desk job...Do you?"

Ergo, DH left school at 15. After being in forestry, the military and working on an estate he decided to go to evening classes and to sit the Aberdeen Uni entrance exam. He matriculated in his 20s and graduated in his early 30s.

He became a secondary school teacher (and later school middle manager) and was able to use his own experience to show his pupils that it's possible to make changes in your life.

When you do apply to uni that’s when you will start to hear it mentioned more often. You will be asked within your application whether anyone in your family has attended university. It’s also something I see quite often in my professional life.

I have never seen anyone on MN mentioning being the first in their family to go to university (this is the first thread I’ve seen that even vaguely relates to the topic), but have experienced it being discussed in real life on numerous occasions.

Back then? Some of your friends parents will be in their 49s and 50s.

I don't see how his career turned out means he wasn't reporting to people younger than him?

You don't?

He was in his early 30s when he started teaching.

For a start, his first HoD was someone a good bit older than him. His second HoD was someone else who had had a career change - he was a former police officer and older than my husband. His HT was close to retirement age. The depute was also older.

In fact, many of the teachers at that school had been in other jobs first - and no, that wasn't that unusual.

I went straight from school to uni. Eventually, I became a HoD. Most of my line managers were older than I was, but a few years before I retired I had a line manger who was significantly younger. (In fact, two of the deputes plus the Business Manager were younger.) That can happen in all careers.

Friends who are teachers have generally been in management roles by the time they were in their 30s so that seems like an anomaly to me.

Not that that should put anyone off going to university or changing career obviously but I wondered if that's what you meant. That the age of his management team didn't matter

I hope you are proud of it when you go to uni op.

I didn't realise I was first in my family to go...until I realised I was.

Main difference was think DPs expected I would just be on a conveyor belt into a good job - but if you don't get internships or onto a graduate scheme at 21/22 it's really difficult. And you need confidence and connections and sometimes parental financial support which you don't have if you don't have them at that age. Parents who have been can also give their child more confidence (or just give more support in finding things).

That's really what the first in family to go statement is about.

To be fair they used contraception to not get pregnant. Being a mother doesn't make you automatically brighter than them. Where i lived alot if girls were pregnant by the time they were 17-18 but those who wanted too went to uni and juggled young children

I both agree and disagree, OP.

There are certainly plenty of people, and families, where getting a degree was seen, and in fact was, the entry to the middle class. So it was seen as a real step up for the family.

But I also agee that to a large extent, the reason so many of my generation (I'm about 50) went to university while our parents did not, is down to major changes in the economy.

None of my grandparents went to uni, but they were quite well educated and held down responsible jobs.

I couldn't agree more with OP.
I've seen it sometimes on book jackets of novels, regarding the author. If you know something about them, you know they actually came from a relatively or very privileged background. but it so happens that no one in their family has been to university, eg because they went to agricultural college etcetera. It's so annoying because it's meant to give the idea that the author is some type of phenomenon fo rising from poverty to publlsh a novel.

It's certainly the case that teachers are now acquiring management roles at a younger age. That's not universal and it wasn't always the case.

It may well be anomalous in your experience, but not in mine. Mind you, we're from different generations (I assume).

When I was a school pupil, there were many teachers who trained after serving in the military. There was also (in Scotland at any rate) a scheme to encourage mature entrants to the profession in the '60s and early '70s. I believe that there are similar schemes in England these days?

I recall that my favourite English teacher had originally been a joiner. His HoD would certainly have been at least the same age and our HT was a veteran who had been an interpreter in the WW2 peace negotiations. (God bless the man, he took me for a crash course in German.)

Even so, it used to be that if you'd gone straight into teaching you wouldn't dream of applying for your first APT/ assistant HoD role until you had at least 5 years experience under your belt. The mantra used to be "It takes 5 years to make a teacher." I recall that there was a 10 point classroom teacher progression when I started out and the probationary period was 2 years. It's down to 6 in Scotland now, if you include the probationer year.

However, both then and now maturity and experience could be taken into consideration when it came to promotion.

Families with generational attendance at higher education do have an advantage. I went through university selection blindly and with zero input from anyone. No idea about careers, graduation schemes, nothing.

People gate keep so much.

I'm 42 so suspect you are a generation before me, still there's no pretending qualifying 15 yes late than most of your colleagues doesn't make a difference

Yes, I'm 65.

It very much depends on your line of work and your previous experience. In some jobs it makes a significant difference.

My mother went to university and it really helped to someone highly educated in the home

I’ve worked with one person who was the first in his family to go to uni. I think it’s a huge achievement he should be proud of, to have succeeded in an academic sphere and gone on to work in the corporate world which is still overwhelmingly middle class and private school. He’s had to forge his own path much more than I have had to, where uni at 18 and getting honours is as expected as starting reception was, like my parents.

I’m the first in my family, I also spent time in foster care as a child and the number of of foster kids who make it to uni is statistically really low. So it IS huge achievement.

I’ve read this thread with interest as I was also the first in my family to go to uni. My dad left school at 12 (this was in 1927) and my mom at 14. They had to earn money. They were very supportive of me but were unable to help me practically as they had no experience of writing applications, interviews etc so I did all that with my teachers help (in 1971) and yes I’m very proud but I rarely mention it.
I think you’ve had a hard time tonight OP with quite a lot of unnecessary personal criticism - looking at you@ForZanyAquaViewer
OP I think your post above shows that you might be rethinking your views a little? I wish you all the best in the future and if/when you get to uni and cope with studying alongside your family, you should be proud of yourself too.

Oh please. I’m also in my 20s, both of my parents are educated with degrees and good jobs. How do you think the doctors, solicitors, engineers etc of the 90s/2000s got employment? Or do you think those jobs didn’t exist back then?

Likewise most of my friends growing up had parents in similar jobs, who went to university. Your experience is obviously a huge indication that the family/area you were brought up in, didn’t value education & was probably not a great area. Hence how you ended up pregnant at 15/16 as opposed to being focused on education.