To think therapy culture is turning self-reflection into self-obsession?

[MirrorFatigueJay]

It feels like we’ve gone from under-feeling to over-analysing everything. Not every discomfort is a trauma. AIBU to think constant introspection can actually make people unhappier?

Clearly on this thread there are far too many ignorant posters basing their views and pontifications on their hours spent on social media.

Maybe become better informed about diagnoses and the reality of MH , mental illness and therapy in this country.

So not therapy culture then.

Therapy-speak and therapy are two very different things. And I do think that therapy-speak has become prevalent (look on MN, where very DH or MIL who behaves in contravention to the OP is a narcissist). It's become very fashionable among the Tik Tok generation to pathologise everything - they can't make a phone call because it 'gives them anxiety' or they can't socialise because it's 'triggering'. They've picked up a smatter of therapy-speak, poorly understood and use it to avoid doing anything vaguely uncomfortable.

Interesting reading thank you, I stand corrected.

Qualified therapist here. I do think we're in a society nowadays, where mental health and wellbeing is shoved down people's throats. People can't seem to have a down day, as do we all and is a normal part of life, it comes down to having poor mental health, not just common, everyday mood swings.

Everything is excessive and I think there's a lot of online gurus out there who promote it, in order to extort money from people who are or can become vulnerable. It is a normal part of life to have ups and downs, doesn't necessarily mean someone has depression, needs anti depressants or to see a therapist.

Our ability to be a little resilient to normal life issues has been derailed by people who benefit often financially, by inflating a negative outlook for every glitch or circumstance. It makes me so cross to see how much people pay for therapy these days also. It should be accessible for all who need it, not a privilege for upper class society.

Like others, I would draw a big distinction between actual therapy - which varies in quality, but can be an amazing and life-changing intervention - and 'therapy speak'. I think the latter is very harmful and absolutely does encourage navel gazing and self-centredness. My personal bug bear at the moment, which is probably due to my social media algorithms, is the people with young children who boast about how they are parenting perfectly and 'healing the trauma' of their own parents' various imperfections - often while filming their children for public consumption for their own validation. I think many of them are going to get a huge shock when their children grow up...

I agree. I think it can of course be helpful but it can also make people incredibly selfish.

I’m also a therapist and I agree 100 percent with this.
When i work with children and teens I often encounter an attitude from parents that I need to fix issues which would’ve been day to day stressors 20-30 years ago, such as friendship issues, exam stress, low mood.
We all experience low mood. We all experience stress.
Often I’m sat opposite children who seem confused about why they’re there. Often it’s because they’re angry (usual teenage rebellions not using violence against parents)

@miuri I have witnessed this often; parents projecting their own fears or concerns onto the child, as opposed to the child being given space to feel it for themselves.
We're definitely in a time where everything is overanalysed. That in itself is overwhelming for anyone, especially children/teens. So glad to hear another professional relates.

Is that you Dame Katy Denise?

I agree to an extent.

Therapy can be useful, but really I think the reason so many people are mentally unwell is because of 1. lack of community, and 2. lack of being involved in something bigger than themselves like a religion or a charitable cause and 3. Lack of basics like sleep, time outside, poor nutrition etc.

I think therapy can sometimes cause people to attach too much to the contents of their mind, as opposed to building a meaningful life. Some people genuinely have a chemical imbalance or inherited condition which doesn’t really apply.

For common anxiety and depression, if people focused on the basics (food, sleep, water, fresh air) plus having community and meaning in their life then I think majority would massively improve within 6 months or so.

Coupled with this, is a lack of accountability. People say they can’t get better because they’re on an NHS waiting list for CBT. Honestly and truly what do you think 6 sessions of CBT are going to do? They will at best teach you a few coping skills to arrange your thoughts. At best!

I don't think we have a therapy culture but I do think society does tend to go to extremes on many issues like for eg sexual repression to 'sex positivity' in one fell swoop and we're not really prepared for a sensible balance. I think this is the case here too - we've gone from mental health being taboo and stigmatised to at times unhealthy levels of introspection. As pp said it's money-making for some people. Informed by my own experiences but I don't think we always need to talk openly and freely about everything and analyse everything. I think there is a place for the stuff upper lip where it's appropriate. Hopefully we reach a happy medium at some point where it's not taboo, is as accepted as valid in the way physical illnesses and variations are, and people have better resources to find what works for them.

I do hate going to vote for student representatives at uni and instead of seeing why they're qualified for the position or what they'll bring to it, they list their labels. We DO have a culture where labels replace personality, qualifications and experience instead of signify personality, qualifications and experience.

One the big problems with that is that people can't focus on the basics because they're constantly in survival mode. That's the society we have.

Edit re your edit: coping skills are vital in trying to get out of survival mode.

Many argue that ADHD has a lot of environmental factors.
I agree with it, especially locally, many children with bad diets, hectic homes, dysfunctional family are diagnosed with ADHD. If you took half of them into a calm healthy environment, they'd be different children, similarly with adult's.

It depends. Some people really need it and resist it. Some people go to therapy and change their life and some people use therapy to learn therapy speak and use that to manipulate and centre themselves.

And here lies the most ignorant post ever on the subject.🤣

Many children with good diets, happy homes and stable families are diagnosed with ADHD.

Some of us never learnt how to sit with the discomfort unfortunately. Therapy has enabled me to relearn that, YABVU.

Yep mine included. All my children have it as do I. Very stable, healthy home- vegetarian, outdoorsy and 3 degrees between my husband and I.

The ignorance on this subject is massive.

The poster is questioning whether it’s more likely in a disfunctional home - it may be that the disfunctional
home means that it’s harder for the child to develop their own coping mechanisms

No, she's making a sweeping generalisation about the cause of ADHD. Though I'm sure she can speak for herself if she really meant something other than what she said.

I supervise counsellors, including school counsellors, and I agree.

Of course. I didn't say all children or adults with adhd come from chaotic homes. In many cases children from dysfunctional households are misdiagnosed with ADHD due to their behaviour and lack of boundaries, out on the street from toddlers, breaking up things, never told no.
Unless they grow out of it. I have seen many wild children who get diagnosed and within a few years in a school environment, with rules, boundaries and food, they change, no longer staring at ipads, living on sugar.
Try an ipad and sugar diet for a few weeks.
I re-read my post, it did come across that I meant all cases, just as many argue against environmental factors. I agree that it can be both neurology and environmental.
Both of my dc have genetic disorders that are commonly misdiagnosed/cross diagnosed as ASD.

It is a spectrum, some people who have adhd can't function enough for cooking or washing themselves or even leave the house due to anxiety.

Yes two of my children have lives seriously impacted by it.