‘Just the meat for me please’ Sunday Lunch issue ’

[Mondaytuesdayhappydays]

SIS and BIL coming for Sunday Lunch, bringing DN and her BF- recently engaged.
Got a little gift for them and card etc, my parents were coming any way so invited Sunday for food as makes sense.

SIS has just WhatsApped to say jokingly that the BF -mega gym bunny - ‘doesn’t do potatoes and trimmings- but don’t worry he’ll just pile his plate high with meat’
Im doing a couple chickens and a gammon between us all so plenty for everyone alongside stuffing, veg, Yorkies , gravey, cauliflower cheese etc but definitely not for a huge piled up plate of just meat!

I replied lightheartedly to SIS to this effect and she’s not a happy camper at all.
Just texted to say wants him to feel welcome so will bring him a couple of raw pork chops or similar to fry - I’ve said bring them cooked and sliced already in a Tupperware as I won’t be frying chops with all the carnage of the roast going on and my parents milling about under my feet ‘helping’

Shes voice noting at the moment can see the symbol
honestly am I just old or a shit hostess or is this how guests who barely know their hosts I might add expect to be catered for ???

I mean veggie/vegan all power to you
but a plate piled up of meat for lunch seems a bit full on to me ??

My reply to this would be

'Am I fuck providing an entire chicken for one man! Sorry but that's taking the piss. If he wants that much meat, he can bring it. Cooked and ready to go!'

He sounds like a greedy weirdo.

I bet he'll bang on and on about it, too.

Yawn.

you see, i think that is fucking rude: thanks for the invitation to dinner i'll have a whole chicken to myself.

I'd find that hard enough with people i know really really well. Let alone my fiancée's aunt.

My goodness, can not believe the attitude and entitlement..... I have dietary restrictions due to health issues but I would never behave like this. And if I was only served with things I shouldn't ideally eat, I would eat enough to be polite/fill me up. (I can't eat shellfish and I've even tried to eat round them in a paella to avoid upsetting the host ....)
Wonder what they'll serve at the wedding breakfast......

Please do.

In my head I see him picking up a whole chicken and wolfing it down. It is going to be interesting. I hope you don’t mind telling us how it goes.

I’d just serve him up the same as everyone else. Eat it. Don’t eat it. Wouldn’t care

Is he Henry the Eighth?

Is he Henry VIII?

Make him an omelette 😆

You're not being unreasonable but I'd just go with the flow and bung in an extra packet of chicken thighs rather than make it uncomfortable.

I've catered for a veggie before at extra cost and faff. They proceeded to then turn up really bloody late (we'd held up the meal so we could cook the veggie food first for obvious practical reasons) and then made a beeline for the meat feeding themselves before anyone else got chance.

To say I was unimpressed was pretty much the understatement of the year.

I don't mind catering for dietary requirements as long as people don't piss take. Asking for mountains of meat is piss taking because it's so expensive and it massively affects how you stretch the rest of the meat out to everyone else.

It's not a religious or dietary need. It's not even an ethical belief. It's pure and simply a vanity issue.

Vanity diets can piss off. It's hard enough if you have people with reasonable requirements to also cater to.

If you were at a restaurant you couldn't ask for extra meat instead of veg! You'd just have to suck it up and order more at your own expense.

Ha, snap @MrsMitford3!

Course I will 💯 promise
quite looking forward to it now lol
my boys are going to have a field day

Hard agree.

Give me all of the sides over the meat every day of the week.

What kind of a lunatic turns down cauli cheese?!!

I'd make it bloody uncomfortable and to hell with it. Otherwise you have a lifetime of this shite.

Nip in the bus early on.

Great minds 😂😂😂

If I ate only meat i wouldn't expect someone to cook more for me.

Surely he could manage to just have a normal portion of meat for one meal in his life.

I think the key is, though, to make sure you serve people’s meat on their plates, and only the sides are self service.

You can put some extra drumsticks in the oven for him and whoever else wants, and add this to the self service bit of the meal so that he can put these on his plate instead of potatoes etc, but you need to ensure everyone else gets their fair share of the main joints.

That young man is going to get kidney disease later on in life.

What about the other guests? Do they get extra whatevertheywant? Extra trifle?

I hate these sort of situations. My ggm and gm were absolute sticklers for etiquette and good manners, and my dm passed that on in her breast milk! I feel the pressure to be a good hostess, but it makes me extra sensitive to rude guests, and, frankly, more than a bit resentful.

I think it’s great you’ve been able to have a sensible and forthright exchange with your dsis. Really well done.

It’s staggeringly rude to come to lunch and expect to eat an excessive amount of the most expensive food. Eat a normal portion, more if pressed, and fill up on the way there or home, but you don’t inflict your predilections on the host.

Nor do you bring food that requires cooking or further preparation to a meal someone else is catering.

He’ll just eat the meat, is fine. He’ll pile his plate high with meat is not fine. It’s for the host to say, we’ll pile his plate high then, or enquire if there’s something else he might enjoy as a side.

I would bear in mind that it’s your dsis that’s being rude in this situation. The bf might have better manners, and she might just be reflecting what has become normal when she hosts him, rather than what he automatically expects.

I know my sense of decorum is only a hundred years or so out of date. It’s more of a disability than anything else in the 21st century 🤣

What will your boys do to have a field day? Take the piss?

Is this her BF 😍😍😍

I think it's cheeky. Meat is expensive! If you're that strict take your own food to other peoples houses. And it's not the same as people who genuinely cannot eat something.

Cant get over the entitlement and cheekiness of this dude..what on earth..? Why cant he just eat a protein breakfast after his gym bunnying and then eat whatever he wants when home. I cannot ever imagine demanding expensive lunch items from someone. Is this a thing now ?

We have family tea every week and people add in their suggestions
. Don't care what we have as long as it isn't always me that decides..
One Saturday ds announced a quick visit over lunchtime and could he have fish fingers.. He left quite unsatisfied that he wasn't having the box of 20 to himself. I said if he wanted unearthly sized portions he should have brought his own.

So ime a normal portion is acceptable.. Greedy fuckers need bring their own.