Anyone have 4 boys and not have gender disappointment?

[4boyfamily]

I am pregnant with DC4 and just found out at 20 week scan last week it is baby boy number 4. Obviously knew there was a 50/50 chance and I adore my 3 boys but I had such a strong feeling this one was a girl (feel so different!) and have been calling him baby girl for months!! It's absolutely floored me. Didn't think I really had a preference I have always hated the term "gender disappointment" but I suppose that's what I'm having.

It doesn't help that we've told family and friends that it's baby boy number 4 and the responses have ranged from indifferent to shock that we could have 4 boys in a row, to disappointment themselves. It feels like no one is excited so along with managing my own feelings I'm also dealing with constant negative comments as we tell people one by one.

What I'm hoping for is to hear from families with 4 (or more!) boys who have maybe had gender disappointment and come out the other side or who could let me know what it's like with 4 boys one they're all here and growing up together. Do the negative comments from strangers ever end?

Four boys suits me just fine. They are all late teens/ young adults now and it’s been a brilliant whirlwind.

I think that visibly enjoying what you have puts off most of the naysayers.

It’s OK to feel disappointed OP. I would have loved to have had a daughter but I didn’t, I only had a son. I won’t lie, there’s some jealousy that literally every single one of my sisters and cousins have had at least one daughter (and some have multiple daughters) On my husband’s side it’s the same. Just take some time and you’ll realise that you’ll love him once he’s here ♥️ Remember that there’s plenty of women who would do literally anything to have even one baby, of either sex, and you’ve got four!! Enjoy your pregnancy and hope it all goes well for you.

Ask yourself what could possibly be better than three boys? Four boys of course 🥰

Congratulations OP!

Someone in our street has 7 boys she couldn't be happier.
If I was to have children I definitely want boys.

Congratulations! Obviously I would have loved a daughter too but boys are too fab for words!

Yes this!

I have one of each but I'd of loved more sons 😅

My friend has 7 girls and she was a little disappointed the most recent wasn't a boy but she loves her baby regardless 🥰

I've three boys, not four, but I've never experienced gender disappointment. If I'd gone for a fourth baby I'd have been delighted with another boy.

I have experienced the negative comments though during my third pregnancy and after he was born. Some people just say the first stupid thing that comes into their heads.

I have 5 boys (3 angels though) happy with that, never had it in me to be a girl mum.

It’s ok to feel disappointed OP as you’ve got 3 boys and you know how wonderful the are and you wouldn’t swap them but of course it would be nice to have a girl to to experience how wonderful girls are.

I have 3 boys and would have been over the moon to have a 4th, unfortunately we were just a bit too old and couldn’t conceive another. I have loved being a boy mum, enjoy your pregnancy and get excited about meeting the new adorable chap coming into your life!!

Personal opinion:
Given you have 3 boys i think a 4th boy is the absolute best possibly outcome.

You now have a lovely "gang" rather than 3 boys and a girl trailing up the rear....

Its okay to be disappointed. I just wanted 2 the same sex... of course i have got one of each 😅 DC2 is so delightful i really dont care now bit i did feel upset for quite a few weeks at the time... which i feel a bit silly about now but at the time the feelings were very real!

Iv all boys. After my first was a boy (we didnt find out the sex but hoped for a girl) but i was so blown away when he was born then I actually secretly hoped for all boys after that. Dh had a bit of disappointment as he wanted a girl but he got over it.

I think I could have had 20 kids and weirdly I felt they would all be boys.

I adore mine, as wee ones there wasnt really any difference from girls of same age. Mine are all so different and even now as teens.

This!

I have 3 boys and felt like the OP when I found out I was having my third DS. I deeply regret these feelings now and feel very ashamed of myself. My 3 boys (men) are amazing and I am blessed.

I have three boys and it’s so lovely - and I agree with @SalmonOnFinnCrisp, once you’ve got two of the same gender, having all the same is so special for the kids. There’s not a chance we’ll have a fourth, but we have friends with four boys and they also love it if that helps.

The only comment I tend to get is ‘you’ve got your hands full’ - but I think anyone with three gets that. And the odd person asking if we’ll try for a girl (one of my mum’s friends said we should try for a Harper, a la the Beckhams!) - but nothing explicitly negative.

Same here-3 boys. The comment that used to really get on my pip was “ooh, starting your own football team?” 🙄

Congratulations! I have 2 girls 1 boy all adults now.
My own opinion is that boys are much easier reared .....no drama give them Football and away they go! No makeup stains no false tan stains no tantrums.

I was desperately hopeful that my babies would all be boys (and lucky for me, they were), so I can’t relate other than I’d have been disappointed if I’d had girls and then just got on with it.

I have 3 boys not 4 but the negativity we both got from family and friends when ww found out we were having a 3rd boy was horrible. It totally ruined what should have been a magic experience. Other people were disappointed for us despite us being happy. Ds2 nearly died at birth so we didnt care we were having another boy just that he was ok. I actually feel for you as its heartbreaking dealing with other people's being disappointed in your unborn son.

Sex. Gender is different. Their sex is male and they’re boys.

I’ve found there haven’t been many crisis’ that some cheese on toast or pasta can’t fix.

What a bizarre thing to say to a pregnant woman. I have been here over 20 years and have never seen this written.

I’m not sure why you thought the odds of having a girl after already having 3 boys were 50/50 unless it’s different fathers? Does your DH have any sisters? I think the odds of you having a boy were far greater than a girl.

At the end of the day kids are kids. I have one of each but I honestly don’t see the difference. Obviously they are very different children, but not because of their sex.