To not understand the "holidays with small children is just parenting in a different place" complaints?

[LadyGreyjoy]

We have an 18 month old and have just got back from a week all inclusive in Spain. Obviously we did just parent out daughter in a different place, but I don't see that as a bad thing and certainly not a reason to say there was no point in going. I love being a mum, I waited a long time for my daughter due to infertility and I've been dreaming of family holidays for years. Whilst I still had to do the parenting (which I enjoy doing anyway) I didn't have to cook, wash up or clean, the food was lovely and far better than we cook at home, I did no laundry for a week and instead of working all day and only getting two hours in the evening with my daughter a day I got to play in the pool/on the beach with her all day every day for a week. After she was asleep instead of watching TV and being too tired to do anything we sat on the balcony listening to the music from the bar and drank cocktails and chatted, real quality time with my husband I am usually too tired to enjoy.

On here there are many threads making out a holiday with small children is shit and not worth the effort and that hasn't been my experience at all. The journey there and back was a bit rough and exactly what I expected it to be like tbh. Other than that it's been bliss and I would 10/10 recommend people go and do it. I was kind of dreading it after reading all the threads here but I wish I hadn't worried about it so much now.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

nice one

all inclusive
1 x 18 month old

No @LadyGreyjoy YANBU

This was my experience until DS was 3 1/2! It broke me !

Oh I remember you OP

You are the one who is adamant that because you used an egg donor and went through multiple rounds of IVF it means that you cherish your child more and are more invested in your children than those of us that didn’t use an egg donor or IVF.

Oh and your prone to ramming down posters throats talking about the better outcomes of IVF children over non IVF

It's true and backed up by data. Sorry that offends you! 😊

@LadyGreyjoy

women are allowed to talk about things in their life that they find frustrating, difficult or boring, OP.
what do you have against that?
Parenting IS hard and toxic positivity serves no one.

That the children of egg donors are more cherished and invested in by their parents?

@LadyGreyjoy

im sure there are lots of benefits of conventional conception though especially for the mother - not having to go through artificial hormones, injections, embryo transplant, etc. All that stuff isn’t pleasant that women have to go for

Holidays with kids of any age is also "same shit, different location".
People won't fundamentally change just because you are not at home for a week or two.

But yours in only 18m. Come back when they are a mix of adults, teens & pre-teens and all want different stuff at different times🙄

Care to link because I’ve only seen the additional risks from IVF- autism, AdHD etc. I have IVF children.

What data around how cherished a child is by their parents could possibly “prove” what the OP is asserting.

the fact you used an egg donor OP does not and will not mean you cherish your child more than I cherish mine because I did not use an egg donor. For which I am eternally grateful

Oh dear. The more you post the more your showing what sort of person you are. I suspect the reason you don't meet up with other mums is because you arnt invited, not because you don't want to

So, the actual point of this thread was that you’re the superior parent.

Called it.

If thats OP's logic ( and apparent proven data ) then I suppose, people who have had miscarriages and still births, babies die aftwr they were born... does that mean we love and cherish our children more than the IVF parents?

I think she was referring to better outcomes as regards data.

Both declarations are ludicrous and incorrect.

.

Don't want more thanks. I'm fulfilled with the one I have.

I'm sorry having multiple children has made things so difficult for you that you can't wait for others to find out how hard it all is.

You do realise that we can read what you wrote?

So no links then. Didn’t think so.

Oh she was asked on the other thread too

if I recall correctly - brought up one study

but absolutely no data regarding measuring how parents feel towards their child determined whether an egg donor / ivf versus natural conception

Haha sure it is 😂

You're trying so hard to be nasty, it's sad really.

That's fine. I reposted it with the correct quote.

Sorry mum!

https://share.google/uL2Tgwt510HkZnRxY

Here you go.

@LadyGreyjoy how come you haven’t answered any of my questions to you about the basis of your OP being more about you not understanding your quite privileged position - particularly financially - with regards to your holiday that means your lovely experience is not available to those who were complaining about their holidays.

Because I understand my position perfectly well.

I grew up in poverty and have not always been able to afford an all inclusive holiday. My parents certainly never moaned that the holidays were could afford when I was little were just looking after me in a different place and therefore pointless and not a real holiday.

Quite frankly, if I could only afford a caravan that I couldn't easily fit all my kids in and had nothing to cook a proper dinner with making it super stressful like posters are claiming holidays are, I just wouldn't go. I would do day trips instead of save up for longer and go less often because it sounds like hell. We haven't been on holiday for five years btw, we've saved long and hard for this precisely because I don't want to go on an awful holiday that I need to complain to Mumsnet about.

Um it was funded by

Monash IVF Research and Education Foundation, and Reproductive Biology Unit Sperm Fund, Melbourne IVF

so not a peer reviewed well respected university and by people with a big conflict of interest .

There is nothing else anywhere and it ignores the higher chance of Autism and ADHd which absolutely do not bring a better quality of life.