Husband going through bin for cat food

[mrsgumpy]

So I need some perspective on this. And yes I know it is ridiculous to be arguing about cat food.

My husband hates waste. He thinks I don't get all the cat food out of the sachet when I feed the cat. I try to squeeze all the cat food out but I find it disgusting so I am not going to use a teaspoon and scrap every last bit out of the sachet. I prefer to get as much as I can out by squeezing the sachet and then chucking it in the bin. However, every time I feed the cat, DH goes into the rubbish bin, finds the sachet and then scraps the rest of the cat food out. It drove me a bit crazy for a while and then I just decided to let him go for it. This morning it started to irritated me all over again to see DH rummaging in the bin and then trying to scrap out tiny morsels of cat food from the sachet.

I am the first up in the morning, which is why I feed the cat otherwise I would just leave him to it. Whenever he feeds the cat it is such a palaver that the poor cat is almost beside himself with waiting for something to eat. DH also likes to ration the cat's food to avoid waste so he eeks out the cat food in small portions over the course of the day, which means we have a constantly meowing cat around the house. Drives me crazy.

Ok, so what do you think? Am I being unreasonable? Should I just let DH rummage through the bin for cat food and not care about it?

Definitely look for jelly food. Whiskers Poultry in Jelly slides out whole.

"It isn't just the cat food, is it? It will be the soap, the toilet roll, the food bill, the lack of nights out, the mean small grudging birthday presents, the careful halving of all expenses, the whole sad misery of the miser's life."

Omg, yes.

The cat gets dried food also and as I said above the question as to whether it is eating enough is answered by whether it is a healthy weight/losing/gaining. Not what someone else's cat eats or a packet says.

You should tell him in no uncertain terms that it is two sachets a day plus biscuits, and that if he continues to starve the cat you will report him to the RSPCA.

How long is the dry food being left uneaten for before it’s tossed?

im going to suggest that bastard is too damn tight so the same dry food is left day in day out. No wonder the cat doesn't eat it. It will have dust and fly eggs on it. You need to throw it out if uneaten.

You need to tell him that this tightness is ridiculous and youre done with it and start feeding the cat properly.

how can you let this continue? The cats crying FFS. You need to sort it. Now. Get him told. 12 sachets cost under a fiver here. Not dear. The cat should have at least two a day.

Id make him his dinner as usual and then split it between the two of you. Say a lasagne or something. So it’s obvious it’s a half portion.

When he says he’s still hungry offer him dry bread. If he says WTF just say now you know what the cat feels like, still hungry or eat bread (or cat biscuits for the cat), oh and btw it’s been lying out all day so the breads a bit crispy but I’m sure it’ll be fine….

See how he likes it. Ridiculous behaviour. I don’t know how you can put up with it tbh.

Yep

The problem is that if I leave him to feed the cat, the cat has the single sachet eeked over over the course of the day. If I feed him, I know he is going to get the whole sachet in the morning.

Am currently going through everyone's replies and slowly processing. Will write more soon. I appreciate everyone's insights.

I’d put the sachet at the bottom of the outside bin and let him hunt for it every day. Would be rather enjoyable when it rained.

I'd get rid ! Of the husband but keep the cat - he is unbelievably tight and mean, to leave your cat to go hungry.

He is tightfisted and mean and cares more about the money in his own pocket than the health and happiness of your poor little cat.

I would find it difficult to like let alone live with somebody like this.

Fml that behaviour would give me the ick. I USED to be married to one like that. Use dry food ( my cat loves applaws) then there's no palaver and no stinky sachets. It's less packaging waste and I believe, better for their little teeth.

You’re getting a sachet eked out too, aren’t you?

The cat is your spirit animal in all this. Try to be more concerned about yourself because this is no way to live.

I don't think the cat is being neglected - he is absolutely beautiful looking with a shiny coat. But I have to be the one to feed him. We do leave biscuits out constantly in an automatic feeder. He just doesn't like them much (they are the bulk by ones from Costco, because of course). So I buy the more expensive ones to give him in addition. The battle is mostly over the wet food.

I wouldn’t be able to live squeezing out the last dab toothpaste but I’m good at it but you’re being controlled by a miser. Scrooge is it. Ridiculous and don’t put up with it.

Watch A Christmas Carol with him this Christmas and have a conversation about the joy of giving, how money hardens the heart, ruins relationships and doesn’t buy happiness.
I like the version with Albert Finney.

Could this - husband going through bin to excavate cat food sachets - be your alternate version of ‘she divorced me because I left dishes by the sink’?

It sounds like there are other issues too (though I’m totally with you about how annoying this is).

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sinkb9055288

He sounds horrid. Don't minimise it. One sachet of food a day is a pathetically tiny amount of food for an active cat.

You need some standards. I wouldn't stand for someone being deliberately cruel and talk that down to him being cheap.

Like I am not being dramatic, I do not think I could cope with this I'd have to LTB! Rummaging through the bin 😭I can't. Hygiene before anything else...

Just to add - you can easily feed1 pouch a day and have an overweight cat - if you feed biscuits too

The cat does have access to dry food too
mine is on a diet and has two small tins a day and no dry food at all

I have not read the whole thread but you know a cat needs 3 pouches plus some dry food each day, right? Your cat is hungry. Sort your fucking husband out or rehome your poor cat.

I mean this from the bottom of my heart as someone who is a germaphobe, animal lover and of a somewhat nervous disposition, I don't think I could manage a week being married to your husband. I literally think I would have a nervous breakdown worrying about the germs coming out of the bin and the poor, miaowing cat all day. Fck me...

I'd take it out of his hands completely by rinsing out the pouch and ompletely remove the empty pouches to the outside bin immediately. I'd keep the outside bin on the front to deter him going through it in front of neighbours.

You need a knife, not a spoon. A pointy knife is the best way to get all the fiddly bits and gravy out. Then rinse the sachet so your bin doesn't stink. Leave it out to dry and so your DH learns a lesson.

I think the real problem is that your DH checks up on you, even though it's always you that feeds DCat. If he feels he can do it better than you, then he should make it his job - except he can't be relied upon to stick to the DCat's routine. He's a total dick for messing DCat around like that.

Could we have a cat photo please?

I hope that dry food bowl is always topped up. My cat's is, he gets half a pouch morning and evening. He's healthy and athletic but does graze on the dry food throughout the day.

3-4 sachets a day or 2-3 sachets plus dry.
That's what an ordinary, active cat needs. He is underfeeding it, poor love. Can you feed more, on the QT when he's not around? Leave some dry overnight?

Normally, when cats are fed well they'd leave a bit in the bowl anyway, stopping the need to go through the bin. Eww btw.