Feeling a bit shaky after an encounter in Sainsbury's

[HelenSkeleton]

I just went to a Sainsbury's Local and picked up a bar of chocolate advertised at £2.40. It scanned at £3.00 and there was another shelf with the same bar at the higher price so I went to the counter, explained that I was confused about the price and the woman behind the counter went to check.

While she was doing that a woman who looked like a manager came up to me and very rudely told me there was "no need to get like that". I wasn't like anything. I was not rude, unkind, nasty or anything. I was perfectly calm. I told her I wasn't "getting like anything" and was merely confused. I was also confused by her attitude. She was very argumentative told me that "we make mistakes" which I acknowledged but she continued arguing with me saying"I've just told you we make mistakes". I hadn't even complained, simply asked for the correct price. I told her she was protesting too much at this point.

She was really confrontational at which point I said "you know what, let's just leave it" and I left the shop. I'm actually shaking and I don't know why. Her reaction was out of all proportion. I feel quite sick.

Shaking is out of all proportion op. She sounds weird. Forget it.

In the scenario you describe, it won't be about you. Even if she misunderstood or was told something untrue, it will be her discharging a horrible feeling onto you for her own reasons. That can be a very upsetting feeling and I hope you quickly shake it off.

It's a physiological reaction that's surprised me.

Probably because it was so out of kilter with your innocent question. Don’t let it ruin your night. If it helps try to picture that she had a terrible day and misunderstood, forgive her and then move on.

I had a similar reaction from the same supermarket a few months back. I bought some coffee on a nectar price as well as other items and when I scanned my nectar card, the bill didn’t go down as much as I’d thought. When I got home, the coffee hadn’t been reduced, so next day I popped back on the way to work and they got really arsey over it. It was almost £3 off and they had faces like a cat’s bum. Don’t take it personally, at least you didn’t buy it.

There was absolutely no need for the manager to get involved at all.

You encountered a grumpy woman -
you weren’t arguing - that’s a two way process -
she was being snappy
it happens
end of
you don’t need to be shaking and feeling sick -
tell yourself you are quite safe !!! And move on - you are massively over reacting !!

Some people are just odd.
Best thing to do is not engage at all. Answer in one sentence and don't respond after that. For example, just say 'I'm waiting for the price, thanks' and turn away. If you don't argue back it can't go anywhere.
If you are sure they worked for Sainsbury's, make a complaint.

I wonder if this triggered a memory of a previous encounter. Did she remind you of a teacher or something?

I understand the shaking - that’s the adrenaline and it’s your body’s reaction to the hostile situation.
it’s her not you - you did nothing wrong.

Not really no. Not that I can recall anyway.

I once made a complaint about rude staff in Sainsburys. A very pleasant man rang me to apologise.

Oh God, that reminds me of the time I had a cashier corner me when I was with my newborn, suddenly threatening to take me to a back room with security and wait for the police because she had seen me stealing. She had a huge smile on her face, she was loving it, going on and on, and I was also shaking and so embarrassed and stressed, thinking I must have put something in the buggy through sleep deprivation. Turned out she had seen something from another shop in my buggy and decided to go on a power trip.

Anyway, I reported her and got a gift card and never saw her working there again.

Thanks everyone. I'm going to complain.

Having worked at Sainsbury's that was bang out of order. About 40% of my time there was spent dealing with price discrepancies. You are right to complain

This was a her problem not a you problem but I sympathise. I had to question the change I was given in a shop not being enough and a very unpleasant manager was unnecessarily confrontational and argumentative. I ended up leaving it and going home but I was also surprised by how much it rattled me. I think it's because it comes out of nowhere and raises your adrenaline.

I've been noticing for ages now that shopworkers are becoming extremely arsey. They act like they're running the bloody stock exchange, not flogging jam and haemorrhoid cream.
And being overcharged has happened to me many times. I've always been refunded, politely, but it's annoying.
Report her. She's unprofessional.

It really wasn't an issue. The girl behind the counter had gone to check and this woman (I got her name) just muscled on. It was weird.

I would have to said “okay, as you are being rude I’ll go to another shop”

Don’t let it ruin your evening, do something you like to relax.

I've put her first name, Sainsbury's and the address into Google and her LinkedIn has popped up so I have her full name now.

She graduated in 2020!

How strange, she must have been looking for a fight and decided you would do perhaps? I’d be unsettled by such a reaction to a basic query.

I was about to express sympathy that you bumped into somebody who was clearly having a really shit day and took it out on you

Then you posted that. What's that got to do with anything?

I had a man cut in front of me in a stressful situation in an airport. I was literally talking to the airline rep at the time. I said to him very quietly "this lady is still dealing with my query" and he shouted "CALM DOWN". That wasn't a great situation. Sounds a bit similar. Yes, I understand it's stressful. I would just try to forget about it now. Don't be stalking people on the Internet. It won't help.

I have had an awful encounter with a terrible Manager at a Sainsbury’s recently, too!

Well I am going to complain about her. It's absolutely bizarre and she looks like she has gone into management for the wrong reasons.

This is a bit weird. Why are you looking her up?

If everything happened as you said, then she was out of line, but searching her online is unhinged. What are you going to do, have a wine, find her on Facebook and message her to call her a po-faced bitch?

Just complain to Sainsbury’s and get on with your life.