To date a man with four kids by two women?

[Carlott4]

I’ve met someone I really like, but he has four kids by two women. Both were long term relationships. Would you go there?

New thread on MN seven years from now, from a different, younger woman:

”I’ve just met a man who I like. He has six children by three women. Is that a red flag?”

Run to the hills
Run for your life...

Is he an active parent with these children, with regular contact and paying child support?

Not in a million years.

If two women already (that you know of) have got rid, despite having to look after his children, then what does that tell you?

Hell to the no!

I would avoid like the fucking plague!

Absofuckinglutely not. Not even if he had a diamond encrusted solid gold cock.

I wouldn't date a man with one child, let alone four 😂

Nope.

but only because I’ve been there, done that and it didn’t end well.

sold my soul for 13 years to accommodate his nightmare kids and him.

we have 2 kids together too, best thing I did was kick him out.

i would never again date or enter a relationship with anyone with kids under 18

No way.

How old are they and you?

If you're envisaging a blended happy families situation or want DC of your own be very vary.

I wouldn't judge him for having had two families, but I wouldn't want to be involved in rearing them, or producing a third, and TBH the family dramatics around holidays and birthdays etc might be a bit much, even if they're adults.

Exactly. 😁
You beat me to it.
Not now, not 20 years ago, not ever.
Myself first!

No way

Not in a month of Sundays!!

Read the other threads that's on today with a woman who's fed up looking after her DHs 4 kids every weekend...

This really!

I definitely wouldn’t be moving in with him until those children were grown.

There could be loads of extenuating circumstances but it does come with the huge danger that he’s looking for someone to take care of his kids when he has them.

Also you have to wonder why both these women had kids with him then they split up - almost as though he failed to step up as a father each time…

I mean it might not be that but that’s your first thought.

Regardless of the number of women he chose to impregnate, if he's even the most bare minimum parent he simply would not have time to date.

With so many kids he should be absolutely flat out, parenting. If he's not, that's incredibly unattractive.
How would dating him enhance your life?

It would be a no for me.

Although I know in the case where both sides have kids they merge together, not all but some.
But I have seen situations where a couple do not fully live together, and the bf uses her place to bring his kids, as he doesn’t have a suitable other place wherever else he goes.
And even worse all quite happy for the state to pay the rent, when he works full time and has full freedom to work whatever days/hours he likes, unlike many mothers!

Nope, not a chance in hell.

I wouldn't fuck him with a borrowed vagina, and you couldn't waterboard me into dating him.

Depends how old he is, how old you are, how old the kids are.

If you're both of an age where you don't or can't have further children and his children are adults or nearly adults I would consider it.

Otherwise no.

Not a chance. I wouldn't want all my money and efforts going to support and better our family unit and most of his going out the door to support two others.

OP, you need to follow the links provided upthread by a few posters. They are to a recent thread by an OP who married a man with four kids and living to regret it. Why would you do that to yourself ?

Nope.