Would you/have you spent hundreds on a prom dress?

[Dramatic]

My daughter is in year 11 and a lot of her friends have already started shopping or already bought their prom dresses. Some have spent hundreds (£350-£500) and their parents have actually taken out payment plans or loans to get them....this seems insane to me? Are shops just ripping people off? Just seems like a ridiculous amount of money for a dress to be worn for a couple of hours.

When I got my 18yo her prom dress we went to an ex display shop and paid around £50 for a gorgeous dress.

It’s American consumerist nonsense. See also baby showers and gender 🤢🤮 reveal parties.

But if that poster can afford it and is happy to spend that amount of money why are they a mug ?

Nope. Not a chance. Both DDs got their prom dresses from Vinted. They looked fabulous and spent less than £50.

In my experience, it was the girls from lower income families who bought the expensive dresses, had professional hair styling and make up etc.

I left school early 90s, I must have just had a more sensible school then 😁
They certainly weren't the norm back then anyway, not in my experience.
No social media trying to outdo each other either.

It's MN.

It's nearly the law you MUST hate any kind of fun and celebration, birthdays, weddings, hen parties, baby showers all the way to holidays, days out.

and your life must be as miserable and devoid of fun as possible. 😂

or it's a way for bitter posters stuck at home with nowhere to go and no invitation to make themselves feel better

More bloody fool them. If you're struggling financially, one of the last things you should be spending money on is a dress to be worn for 3 or 4 hours only. What sort of lesson does that teach a child?

This is BS. It's the equivalent of spending 40K on a wedding when the marriage only last a year.

Presumably nobody gets married thinking it will only last a year though.

I spent 280 on my daughter's and it was worth every penny.

It's a 1 off event.

She looked knockout.

Gosh I’ll happily buy a dress but £300+ wasn’t what I was thinking.
Maybe we’ll hire one or get a high street dress. Although saying that, there’s a local shop that only sells prom style dresses and she always looks in the window…. I’d best get saving.

I spent £600 just on the dress but my daughter had been through a major operation and was almost paralysed. It was the one thing that kept her going. She had to sit and watch most of the prom but it was a celebration that we weren't sure she would ever make. Hopefully my other two will wear the dress but I won't be spending this much again.

Because they are ruining the environment. . . with tat . . .

Agree. Surely we can take an "each to their own" approach on this. You don't have to spend a lot on your children's proms but it says more about you than other people if you go around judging and thinking you are better than them.

My children are phenomenally tenacious and have battled through a lot and are all round amazing kids. If when the time comes I want to give them a decent budget for the prom thats between me and them.

They won't be judging how your child celebrates and nor will I. Each to their own

Well all the posters who go on several long haul holidays a year because holidays are very important to them are ruining the environment more.....

Yes I agree with you. My argument is more about the value being placed on vulnerable teenagers looks rather than their achievements and that really worries me. It places values at a vulnerable age that are wrong and sets some young women up for failure. Mostly those from poor and diverse backgrounds.

Because school is no place to parade differences in wealth, of which proms seem to have become a major manifestation. I’m genuinely shocked at the sums mentioned on this thread - it must be even more jaw-dropping for those really struggling at the moment.

Pps saying that you ‘need’ to allow for professional hair, nails and make-up and fancy transport et etc. Not in a sane world with healthy values you don’t. These are teenagers - it’s not their wedding. It should be a matter of looking in the wardrobe for something a bit smart, not going on a bank-busting shopping blow-out so that you can look better than everyone else, which is a terrible lesson for youngsters to absorb.

The idea of an end-of-school celebration/party is fine. But that’s not what these American juggernauts have become, is it?

Several pps on this thread for a start.

And people I’ve met in real life too, unfortunately.

I got mine for 50p from a car boot sale new with tags 11 years ago, loved it! It was a black satiny A line dress. Very me.

100% this. It’s inculcating unhealthy competitive and consumerist values and must be really difficult for some youngsters.

Schools have allowed these things to become monsters and it would be really hard to rein them in now.

It also places a huge amount of pressure of other kids who cannot afford it. Even if I was a multimillionaire, I would refuse to spend that kind of money on a dress to wear once or twice. It's obscene.

Neither DD nor DS told any of their friends how much their dress/suit cost.
If you have a DC who brags about that sort of thing then I would say thats a parenting issue

Interestingly, my dd went to a private school for the last 2 years of high school. The difference between her former state school prom photos (blingy dresses, false eye lashes, flashy limousines etc) and the low-key private school "prom" was quite shocking. Most of the kids at her school wore charity shop vintagey dresses, summer dresses, many even wore "fancy dress", nobody arrived in a limo etc. It's just sad that families who are already struggling have this added pressure to buy shit foisted upon them. No doubt that if dd had been at her state school, we too would have ended forking out a hundred odd quid for a dress - because the peer pressure is overwhelming. I just feel for those that can't participate.

What a ridiculous waste of money.
Thankfully, my DS has no interest in attending his as he doesn’t particularly like most of the students at school.

DD's upper 6th formal dress was about £300 from a local formal dress shop. She didn't demand an expensive dress and ordered £20 dresses from Vinted and £50 dresses from Quiz but none of them suited.

She has a small waist but GG cup and finds it hard to get dresses to fit. At 18 it would have got her down. This dress fitted her perfectly and she was so happy that we didn't mind at all. It was her final year and she's usually lowkey and not a big spender.

She would have loved to have got away with a cheaper dress off vinted or high street but no joy. The more expensive dresses gave her the support she needed.

I wouldn't get into debt for something like that but if you can afford it each to their own.