Would you/have you spent hundreds on a prom dress?

[Dramatic]

My daughter is in year 11 and a lot of her friends have already started shopping or already bought their prom dresses. Some have spent hundreds (£350-£500) and their parents have actually taken out payment plans or loans to get them....this seems insane to me? Are shops just ripping people off? Just seems like a ridiculous amount of money for a dress to be worn for a couple of hours.

When I got my 18yo her prom dress we went to an ex display shop and paid around £50 for a gorgeous dress.

This is not new. Mine was £250 in 2007

No just a parent who thinks her daughter deserved a special night to celebrate the end of 5 years of hard work at school. If I can afford it then why shouldn't I.

I didn't begrudge our younger DD's their prom dresses as they kept them and as they've got similar tastes they were able to wear them again when our eldest DD got married and they were bridesmaids. Think they were about £160 from Coast and they had 2 good outings.

It's when people spend money they don't have that it gets silly.

I think some can cost that much, but there’s plenty around for a fraction of that.

My DD got her prom dress from Amazon, she’s not really into dresses and dressing up so just wanted something simple. A local seamstress shortened it and added some sparkly straps for £25.00

I did treat her to an updo (I can’t do hair to save my life) from my hairdresser and a manicure from my nail lady.

She wasn’t interested in limos or anything like that, she got a lift with her friend’s mum and I picked them all up.

She’s worn it a few times since and I’ve just posted it up to uni for her to wear for a Christmas ball so we’ve had our moneys worth from it.

Yes this is what I'm thinking, I know in reality it's none of my business but it just seems a bit mad to me to get in to debt for it

We paid £99 for dds and another £40 to adjust it,

dds prom was 2021 so just after covid and there were still restrictions so she didn’t have the typical prom. So I probably would have spent a bit more but no more than £200.

my own wedding dress cost £250! 😂

DD would look amazing in a bin bag, but she works hard and has been through a lot too and I will be happy to give her a decent budget to spend up to. She loves fashion and design and will enjoy the process of trying on lots of dresses. But the money will come out of savings/ ready money not debt

I spent a fair bit on ball dresses (we had them at end of 5th form and end of 6th form and I went to lots of balls at university too). A beautiful dress for a special night seems fine to me. Why it's no different from spending on a dress for a wedding or a NYE party or something.

My Dds bought shoes from primark and 1 hired a limo with friends i think it was £20 each, tbf my eldest is 32 so things will be more expensive now.

Dd found one online for about £120. 2 weeks later we went into lockdown and she never had a prom.
dress is still hanging in her wardrobe unworn!
2 years later dd2 chose a suit from
asos for about £100, she wore it and looked amazing. Her friends came round for the afternoon and they all did each others hair and nails etc. we did have a very fancy car but only because our friends have a classic car company and incredibly kindly offered to loan one to dh to drive the girls.
Otherwise we’d have just dropped them in our normal cars.

Username checks out!

If they have the money and want to spend it that way, that’s really a matter for them.

I do have the money but wouldn’t. My choice.

I think you should definitely only spend what you can afford. I have three dcs who have all gone through proms (2 dss and 1 dd). Honestly the loveliest girls were not the ones in the most expensive outfit, it was the girls who had picked the dresses which suited their body shape and colouring.

That's what's so sad. The prom may be their one and only once in a life time opportunity.

It's a school dance. DD bought a £50 frock from Asos. There were no limos, nails or make-up artists. All the girls did similar and they all looked fabulous.

Sometimes I've seen the boys and girls from our local comp congregating by the village hall waiting for their limos. It's bizarre.

No chance one came from Joe Browns one from China and one from pretty little thing.

because your initial post implied that "this is just the way it is" expect to spend near £1000 on one party when that's just not true.

You're the one saying it's " a once in a lifetime" event, pampering is part of it etc

You're making it out to be bigger and more important than it actually is. You're the one falling for the hype and are now trying to justify your OTTness.
When yes, it's perfectly reasonable and good fun for the girls to get ready together and do each others hair and make up, it's all part of the shared experience that many many girls and young women experience each week going out with their friends and getting ready together.

No child needs a £450+ dress to celebrate the end of one part of their education. You've made that up yourself...

My DD doesn't want to go to prom but when I was thinking about it in the past I always assumed we would get something online or from the High Street. Then I was talking to my hairdresser and she told me that it's the done thing to go to these specialised shops and they will take your DC's school name and the dress they've picked and make sure nobody else from the same school picks the same dress. Apparently all the prom shops in the area will liaise so no two girls go in the same dress. I didn't even know these places existed let alone that it was such a big deal.

Whats so sad about it though? Its much more than a school dance. For a lot of those kids it may be the last time they will see each other as they move onto dofferent colleges etc. Its a formal sit down dinner though, not a just a school disco.

They can have special night without spending £500+++

Honestly, your daughter was there presumably to have fun with her friends first?

Still no reason for anyone to push a narrative that spending that much money is the norm.

We went to a very well known prom dress place. It’s very local to us, but people come from all over the country for it, you need an appt. The prices were horrendous, I steered Dd to one in the sale, was still £170 I think. I’d misread the handwritten label and thought it was £120,

Most of them were around £500 and this was 8 years ago.

i do still think even at £170 it was a waste of money. A dress from Quiz or ASOS would have been as nice.

If they can afford it, then fine. But I wouldn’t.
Didn’t spend on my wedding dress either…

Daughter's dress was £400 by the time I'd paid to have it altered. But she did her own hair, makeup, nails, used cheap sandals and handbag she already owned and was driven for free in a friends car, so I didn't really mind. Obviously I could afford the £400 or I wouldn't have spent it. When she went to her 6th form dinner, dress was £18 off vinted. I did prefer that!

... Wow, that escalated quickly...

Blimey, no need to be quite so triggered. People can have different opinions.