Baby name remorse

[WantingSomeAdviceOnLife]

I have name remorse for my 8 week old baby. Quite severely. Husband is being largely unsupportive. AIBU to expect that he would support my feelings and want to change it?

Why don’t you like the name?
Could your feelings be linked to PND?

I don't know, I do wonder that TBH.

A name is just a name but unless you went for something weird then guess it could be changed?

This is quite common OP, sometimes in PND but sometimes just symbolic of the commitment.
Has anyone said anything to make you regret your choice?

Is he very attached to the name? As in it's a family name or has other positive associations for him? If not then he needs a bit of an attitude adjustment if it is severely affecting you - also second the question about PND.

Not remotely weird. A very normal name

Yes there have been a few associations mentioned to the name that I do not like at all. Also some nn that I had not thought of at all.

Have you another name in mind?

I'd take the pnd suggestions seriously. Could you talk to your midwife or your HV about how everything is going?

Hrtf
@WantingSomeAdviceOnLife if you haven't registered the birth you've got time to choose the name of your choice
I don't see the problem.

How did you choose the name? Was it a compromise? Did you pick it long before baby arrived, or feel rushed to decide?

Birth has been registered for weeks now but we change the BC if it comes to it. However DH is not being supportive at all

Was a name on our list, baby needed a name. Wasn't thinking straight I don't think

Yep!

What do you mean by “not supportive”?

is he flat out refusing? Dismissive? Laughing at you? What?

I thought Remorse was the name. Like Inspector M plus Re.

I think it's fair enough that he doesn't want to change the name now. I second looking into some help for PND.

It's tricky. I feel for you cause it's hard that you aren't happy with it. Does he not like the other name that you prefer?

How long have you felt this way?

If its already registered, I would give it some time and see how you feel when things are a little more settled as having a baby creates a whole whirlwind of hormones and emotions and changes.

If you still don’t like it or want to change it in a couple of months then bring it up calmly again with your DH and see if he listens more when it’s clear you’ve given it some thought and time

I had this, it might have been a name change or two ago, but I posted on MN about it. I had given DS a unisex name (not really deliberately, I always thought this name was a boys' name but people kept thinking I'd had a girl).

Some kind posters told me to wait a few months and the name would be my son's and I'd love it as I start to love him more. They were right. I think I felt my DS was a stranger initially (which is common and normal). Now when I see his name written down unexpectedly (it's sometimes part of place names etc) I get a little feeling of joy.

Whereas when I hear/see the alternative name that I wanted to change it to, I just feel a bit blank, it doesn't mean anything.

You'll probably feel the same.

What is the name ?

It’s really common, before babies are born, we get so excited about picking the “perfect” name, but once they’re here, that initial excitement can fade and things feel different. You’re definitely not being unreasonable for feeling this way, and your husband isn’t wrong either, it’s just that your feelings about the name have changed now that your baby is here.

Also once he started responding to his own name (turning towards you when you say it) I knew there was no way I could change it after that. And that's always earlier than you think it'll be, before they can talk etc.

I don't recommend you answer this op as you'll get people saying "yeah change it, it's not a good name".

The name itself isn't the point really. As long as it's an actual name, he'll grow into it and you'll come to love saying it

If it was on your list then I dont think dh is being unreasonable. Does he like the replacement name?

Is it the admin he cant be bothered with? That's a bit unreasonable. Is he worried you will change your mind again?