How to ask for my money? Girl’s night out a couple of weeks ago.

[brownalien]

I paid for a fair bit, everyone else has transferred the money back. Friend in question text to ask for bank details, I sent them, she still hasn’t transferred. Awkward.
We’re not hugely close (if we were I would just chalk it up and probably she’d get the next round in when we next went out). I’m finding it annoying more than anything else. Before anyone says - there are definitely zero financial issues.

Seriously? Just why ...

Hi Valerie, just going through my bank statements: please can you transfer me the £28 for the night out? Thank you!

So you can be assertive 🤣🤣

Message Hey friend, I'm guessing you forgot to send me the cash. Can you do it later please?

On a group chat, not a DM.

I always say “Pay up or I’ll send a heavy round. And that’s me, so be warned!”

Well done OP! It might be that she genuinely forgot and will appreciate the reminder.

This happened to me once where I was sent the bank details when I was in the middle of something else and then it slipped my mind for a couple of days. I hate owing people money and always pay up so I was genuinely pleased that I was reminded, but was also mortified that I had to be reminded!

Oh that thread should be in classics! Along with the one about the CF who pawned the OP’s Loubitons😳!

Need to read the air wrap thread now! Has anyone got a link?

'Just checking my bank statement and noticed the money from that night out isn't there. Bit worried that it might have gone astray so just wanted to check whether you've sent it?'
Then you're contacting her from a place of concern rather than accusation but it will give her a nudge if she has genuinely forgotten (and a reminder if she's pulling a fast one)

I’d say “hey not sure if you tried to transfer me the money for the brunch but just letting you know I didn’t receive it. Looking forward to catching up soon”. Something like that - no accusation, just stating the fact which could be some kind of admin error!

checking in for the update!

Along with the one about the CF who pawned the OP’s Loubitons😳!

Wait, what?? I need that link!

Nothing as of yet…

She’s not going to pay you! She thinks she has got away with it so has no reason to pay you now. Please message her. You have had hundreds of replies urging you to.

I did message her earlier and she’s read it but no reply

How did you word it?

What a cheeky bitch

It's good you messaged. I once had a friend tell me I hadn't paid her back for something, when I knew I had. Checked my bank app and I had sent it to someone with a similar surname by accident!

Yes. I saw a clip of Jordan Peterson on TikTok talk about how people who are too afraid of conflict end up becoming resentful people as they’re taken advantage of so much. You can see that in the keyboard warrior behaviour here.

I did similar once (lots of times) but told once. Luckily to one of my sons. I was sending (multiple times) money to my other son who never questioned why I was sending him random sums. Son who should’ve been getting the money was a student and needing money to eat so chased rather than starve. Poor thing. So you never know unless you ask.

It should be her that feels awkward!

I used to be like this..

Most people make a genuine mistake....
Till I realised that some of these type of people rely on folk never chasing them....these CF rely on this...

“Hey Mate, it’s getting awkward reminding you that you owe me £28.50. I don’t want this hanging over our heads next time we meet up. Can you transfer the money please?”

Send the details. If she genuinely forgot she will appreciate not having to scroll back to other message. If she's not, who cares.

Love this

This. And maybe suggest a reference for it.

@brownalienthat’s terrible that she’s read your text and not replied or paid . It might be time to start thinking about posting on the girls group chat just saying you’re still awaiting payment and can everyone make sure they have paid. At this point it would be about the principle for me. She thought she had got away without paying and now doesn’t want to. It doesn’t matter whether you can afford to lose it, she should have paid you weeks ago.