I got laughed at in the gym and now I never want to go back

[CinnamonCrunch33]

I am obese. I always have been and potentially always will be. Over the last year or so I’ve lost a lot of weight and finally found some confidence to workout and join a gym.

I’ve always had complicated feelings around working out. I was ridiculed a lot during PE at school, the boys would make horrible snarky remarks and the girls would laugh at me in the changing rooms. I used to get changed in the showers which had curtains between them (like a shower curtain) and the popular girls would press the buttons to turn the shower on so that I would have to come out half dressed, and they’d laugh at me and make cruel comments about my body.

One thing that sticks out to me is I was really unfit at 14/15, but did the cross country anyway. My mum made me go in to do it because she didn’t agree with me skipping it. It was a mix of (slow) jogging and walking for me, but I did it. I remember saying to a friend that I was proud of myself for doing my best. The most popular boy in our year overheard and started mocking me, he made cruel comments about how I’d walked part of the course and how I may as well have not shown up. I didn’t run then for 10 years.

PE teachers used to make remarks about how I wasn’t trying and didn’t put any effort in, how I’d be better off not trying or coming in. As soon as I could stop PE lessons I did.

I was using the squat machine tonight and a couple of younger girls (I’d guess late teens) were watching me and quite loudly laughed and made a comment about how they wouldn’t even bother if they were me, and that they wouldn’t be out in leggings. They kept staring and laughing at me as I moved round my workout and I ended up leaving early to just go home because I couldn’t stand it.

I know I’m mostly being silly but it’s brought back all of those feelings of shame I had from my childhood and I just want to stop working out entirely. It’s made me feel like I don’t belong there, and like I’m being silly to have tried it.

Go you op! Well done. Don’t let these nasty bastards bring you down. So what if you’re overweight? At least you aren’t a snide, horrible person who slags off others to make yourself feel better xx

Ha! Thats what i call taking power back. Well done OP

Well done! Gyms don't like that sort of thing as it gives them a bad reputation. And gyms should be a safe space for all (the gym is my happy place).

Good for you, OP. I was coming on to say can you go with a friend for moral support/to give people like this a mouthful if necessary?

That's a fantastic update, well done OP. And as a very new Puregym customer myself I'm really happy to hear that's the stance they take on bullying. Now please don't let this put you off and get back to the gym if you enjoy it!

(I'm overweight and disabled and very much not your typical demographic for the gym I used to go to, and I found the best thing for me to increase my confidence was having PT sessions. He always had my back, even if I wasn't having a session at the time, and said if anyone even so much as looked at me funny, he'd be coming down on them like a ton of bricks.)

Over the moon to see your update. You go girl!!

This is outstanding advocacy OP, you stuck up for yourself and you have prevented others suffering the same.
And you taught the bigots a lesson.
BRAVO!

As they say round my way: Goanyersel!

Proud of you. :)

They are horrible OP how dare they do this to you, I’m not surprised it made you feel awful! Please don’t let them win - what about joining your local parkrun and walking it to start with while you gain fitness? It’s a really inclusive environment and honestly people will cheer you on during and when you finish they will be elated for you. Also follow some larger runners and exercisers on instagram. I’ve seen stories where they talk about people making fun of them in gyms and what they do about it, it’s very empowering and you feel part of a tribe against these bullies. I’m not obese but I’m very pale and used to go bright red with the effort in PE and it put me off running for many years. I was phobic of it even. I forced myself to do it at uni and overcame the fear of turning red and now I love it. It is possible to overcome the bullies and bad thoughts, you can do it!

I am delighted you reported it and impressed the gym dealt with it so quickly and firmly. Now get back in there, hold your head high and crack on!

And remember, even slim people can be very unfit. You are working to change things and should be very proud.

Good for you @CinnamonCrunch33 !

And brava to the PureGym management at yur branch of the chain. Swift & appropriate action.

Now get those squats in.

Well done OP, what a great result. You should be very proud of yourself.

You are maybe looking back at your childhood and remembering how cruel things were then but now at an Adult Gym i would like to think things will be different.
the gym members are too busy trying to be body beautiful ( guys and girls) to laugh at you . I would ask someone if you can how they use a certain machine i would think they would love being teacher . Go back and hold your head up . I’m at the gym and I’m what some would call obese but I’m doing something about it

Don’t let them win!

Most people in gyms are just not like this, they’re all very much in their own worlds with their own goals and have no interest in anyone else. You were very unfortunate to have such an awful experience. Report it by all means but please keep going!

This is wonderful news you keep it up and enjoy what your doing because your beautiful inside and out x

Stupid little girls. I guess they weren't bothering to work out themselves if they had time to notice you. Most gym-goers are too busy working out to notice anyone else. Don't let them win. Go back and if it happens again report them to the gym staff straight away, most gyms claim to be supportive and intolerant of bad behaviour so they should deal with those pathetic little shits! I go to the gym with one of my sons, he is obese and has had nothing but support. Good luck

What an update. Well done OP.

I hope this response from the gym is a real boost too. You're not on your own.

Best update I have ever seen on this site! Well done OP for not putting up with their shitty behaviour, and all the very best with your fitness journey. Regardless of body size (and I’ve been many many different sizes), being fitter is always better.

Bunch of bitches.

I want to come with you to the gym and give them evils. Fuck them, you are brilliant for going, ignore them.

Perfect example of “Fuck around - Find out!”

I’m glad Pure Gym have acted accordingly.

Never let bullies win.

Absolutely cheering for you here! Well done on reporting it and good for the gym for taking it seriously and booting them out!
I

Outstanding, OP. Well done! 🎉🎉

Well done! 👏 👏 👏 I'm really proud of you 👏 I'm so glad you did that. Why let them enjoy the gym and you quite due to their shitty behaviour?! I'm so glad you've pulled an uno reverse and got them banned! You keep going to the gym and enjoy yourself 💪 💪 💪

I don't know how so many people are raised so badly as to think this is acceptable behaviour. I've had it too, but I was with a PT who confronted the men laughing and tore them a new one before making them leave. Don't give up, the only person they've showed up is themselves and their parents.

My best friend at school was exactly like you at school. I wasn't overweight, but I hated PE, I didn't have much coordination (still don't!) and I was always picked last (as was my friend). She struggled with cruel comments, ridicule and it absolutely destroyed her self-esteem. People don't understand how bullying effects a person, in some cases for life. Well done for going to the gym, that must have been bloody hard to do, yet you were brave enough to do so. It's very easy to say 'take no notice', but when you've had nothing but comments like this throughout your years, it's not easy to do in practice. I would absolutely complain to the gym, no, they may not be able to do anything about it now, but it's something they should be made aware of. Ask them what are their policies if this type of behaviour should happen again? The gym should welcome everyone, regardless of a person's size. Allowing members to bully and ridicule other members shouldn't be tolerated. Age is no excuse - a teenager knows right from wrong, in exactly the same way someone who's 80 does! Don't let these horrible girls win, by making you stay away from the gym.