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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not clean up DH’s sick

308 replies

Dollyflip · 19/10/2025 07:45

DH went out for ‘a few drinks’ last night and rolled in at 1.15am. Our bedroom is downstairs and it’s all open plan downstairs. 11DD slept with me as we are up early for football. DD woke as dog was barking when he got back. Anyway he threw up all over himself on the couch it’s EVERYWHERE. DD was scared and upset as she could hear him just being sick. I went out saying ‘what the heck!!’ And left him to deal with it but he hasn’t. And he just sat saying to me stop being a fuckin prick and sorry. Now he’s fast asleep upstairs with all the sick left everywhere and I have to get up with my DD for football. Should I have cleaned it all up?? Or am I right leaving him to deal with it? I’m going upto him now and telling him he needs to sort it out. I’m so repulsed by him. We are going on holiday weds too but the way I feel now I hate his guts. He hasn’t been sick like this for a long time but has had incidents when hes been drunk which has lead to us nearly splitting up numerous times. I feel to blame as if I had split last time this wouldn’t of happened and my DD wouldn’t be upset!

OP posts:
Nearly50omg · 21/10/2025 21:53

Blondeshavemorefun · 21/10/2025 17:59

Then legally you can kick him out

same as I could as house was in my name and owned by me before we met

Not if you’re married you can’t

Blondeshavemorefun · 21/10/2025 22:26

Nearly50omg · 21/10/2025 21:53

Not if you’re married you can’t

guess depends what you have in writing

I had a co habitation agreement drawn up when we met - that house was mine and mortgage free he never paid anything into it

Imanautumn · 23/10/2025 18:05

Dollyflip · 21/10/2025 08:09

I see a lot of people have mentioned about him having a alcohol problem and being a alcoholic but he doesn’t often drink and can sometimes go a while without drinking, it’s when he does and goes out with his mates that he has ended up in these states. He did a few times in lockdown. We did have marriage counselling a few years ago and he swore never to get in a state again yet here we are down the line.
People mention me leaving him but if I leave the family home won’t that looo bad for me in a divorce?
When we nearly split last year he didn’t leave and stayed upstairs so he won’t leave either I don’t think!

There are many kinds of alcoholics….

Nogimachi · 14/05/2026 20:33

This is utterly vile and of course he needs to clean it up. How appalling that he got in this state and frightened your child.
I would go and tell him this needs to be properly cleaned up and the room fully aired by the time you’re back at X o’clock,

No child should see their parent in this state and no wife should have to clean it up. Vile creature.

ExtraOnions · 14/05/2026 20:59

Nogimachi · 14/05/2026 20:33

This is utterly vile and of course he needs to clean it up. How appalling that he got in this state and frightened your child.
I would go and tell him this needs to be properly cleaned up and the room fully aired by the time you’re back at X o’clock,

No child should see their parent in this state and no wife should have to clean it up. Vile creature.

Given this was 7 months ago, I would hope that it had been cleaned up by now

ThatBlackCat · 15/05/2026 14:56

@Dollyflip Are you still with him?

NerrSnerr · 15/05/2026 21:06

MO0N · 19/10/2025 12:04

You could always play the long game, stand back and let him drink himself to death.
Might not take long if you can also facilitate any other unhealthy habits that he might be prone to.

And ignore the lasting emotional damage to the children along the way.

NerrSnerr · 15/05/2026 21:12

Sorry missed it was a zombie I had already commented on!!

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