Friend wants to bring dog over to my house and I'm not sure how to say no

[lilybit2025]

Got a group of friends over tomorrow for wine night and dinner. My friend has a lovely dog but it's a bit chaotic (springer spaniel) and last time weed all over our carpet. We've just done a renovation and everything is brand new. She's asked if she can bring the dog as no one's can have her but we also have a Mini Doxie who's quite protective and I just don't want the mess or the stress from it all. How do I politely say no, I have a feeling she will likely cancel if I say no too...

Got to the end of the posts and was just about to say this it you beat me to it!

I'm not an advocate of 'No is a complete sentence' but in this case it is.

She needs to get a crate and crate it at home .

It is not cruel to leave a dog alone for up to 4 hours !

If it cries, she needs to train it to be left !

Hold your ground !

I say this as an ardent dog lover, you just say no, my dog doesn't do other dogs, end of.
Your friend is out of order asking given the dog wet on your carpet last time, I wouldn't have the audacity to do so!

^ This.

If she wants to let her life be ruled by her dog that's fine, but you are totally within your rights to say that she can't bring it in your home.

Just tell her no. Bit of a CF to ask considering her dog pissed on the floor previously.

I was about to say like a poster up thread why is it even considered that the dog comes? Why do some people think their dogs are automatically invited?

FFS why are some peeps suggesting excuses as to why the friends dog isn't welcome?
Don't lie, what's the point. I don't want your dog in my home after the mess it made last time, end of.
Stop being so bloody wet and put the big girl knickers on and hoike 'em up.

OP has said 'no' (now)

I think your reasoning is fine. No reason why she can't leave the dog for a couple of hours unless she's planning to stay at yours overnight. If your dog is territorial then you have no idea how they might react to hers and that could cause more challenges.

So her dog is roughly two years old. I'm guessing there's a good reason she can't leave it for any length of time, likely it isn't trained and will pee or destroy her house if left alone.

I've never asked to take my, very well behaved, dog to anyone's house because, she's a dog, she doesn't need to go everywhere with me and can be left alone for the evening.

And likewise I would never let someone bring their dog to my house because my dog wouldn't like it; and that's your reason OP. Your dog's needs take priority over other dogs when it comes to being in your home.

I can't understand why she needs to bring her dog. Is she staying overnight? Our dog is the most loved [way over our kids!] but we leave her for a couple of hours without qualms. Is this dog her furbaby? [sigh]

I've a springer spaniel who would be totally unfit to visit anyone's home.The scent of another dog would have him lift his leg immediately.
You're not the unreasonable one.

Why? OP doesn't want it there and has told friend that. Plus that would be a total pain in the bum. It's a dinner party so OP would have to open the gate (and stop excitable spaniel getting out) every time she goes in or out, not too mention cooking or sorting things out in a kitchen while having to deal with it. Maybe slipping on/walking in its puddles. I am a dog owner/lover but I be mightily peeved to have to mop up someone else's dog's wee in my home. And we keep our dog out of the kitchen for hygiene reasons especially when there's food on the go.

say yes but her dog stays in the garden

AGREE 100

When we had a dog , we accepted not everyone loves a dog. We would cut short long days out (ace excuse sometimes)

When we did take him, he stayed outside (or in a downstairs toilet overnight with a bed and water obvs )

You can say no ! I once had a home visit from someone ‘official’ who had their guide dog with them (council officer) - they tried to tell me I wasn’t allowed to refuse entry (I’m allergic to dogs) but I shut the door on them when they wouldn’t accept it and called the office to ask for someone else to attend who didn’t have a dog with them.

Ha ha obviously not.. It pissed on our carpets last time.
End of chat.

CANCEL THE CHEQUE!!!

Personally wouldn't give her any opening. How long before she puts you in an awkward position and asks/begs for it to be allowed to come in? It's so sad outside by itself, or it's unfair that your dog is in but hers is out, or just for a bit which ends up being the rest of the evening. You've said 'no' OP I'd stick with it.

Personally I wouldn't give her an opportunity to ask for an inch and take a mile

Fair enough, it was only a suggestion for goodness sake! It’s what I would do but what you do is up to you. Don’t shoot the messenger!

Don’t shoot the messenger!

I didn't. I explained why I thought it was a bad idea

apologies , I got the wrong impression of the tone of your comment

Poor dog if he has an infection she's not bothered to treat too, totally should have him neutered. I may be biased as I just hate pugs as a breed-what humans have done to them is atrocious.

Just say you don’t want a lively un-housetrained dog to visit. 🤷‍♀️

@Cornflakegirl7

well, OP’s mate will just have to miss won’t she 🤷‍♀️