Friend wants to bring dog over to my house and I'm not sure how to say no

[lilybit2025]

Got a group of friends over tomorrow for wine night and dinner. My friend has a lovely dog but it's a bit chaotic (springer spaniel) and last time weed all over our carpet. We've just done a renovation and everything is brand new. She's asked if she can bring the dog as no one's can have her but we also have a Mini Doxie who's quite protective and I just don't want the mess or the stress from it all. How do I politely say no, I have a feeling she will likely cancel if I say no too...

Personally I think it is totally unreasonable to ask! OP has invited her friend to dinner. Not her animal too.

Must make going out really hard!

How have you reached adulthood without being able to say no?

’Hi friend, I look forward to seeing you but Bonzo cannot come, you’ll have to find a sitter for him.’

This is where crate training is so useful! If we get invited anywhere which means we’ll be away longer than 4 hours or we can’t get someone to pop in for an hour then we do ask if we can bring the dog. She gets a quick leg stretch when we get there, we quickly set up her crate away from the ‘main event’, settle her in it with whatever she needs and then periodically take her out for a leg stretch and a wee! Suppose this does rely on someone driving but we are rural so have to drive everywhere anyway

Yep this was going to be my reply too, when people started anthropomorphising their animals

I agree, it baffles me that any adult finds it difficult to simply say ‘No, that’s not possible’.

It did wee all over the carpet though so that’s a reason to say no

But why lie? It's ok to just say no, that doesn't suit me.

Not the OP’s problem to solve though is it?

I agree it's a reason to say no, but we've only been told it weed "on the carpet," so until OP tells us otherwise I assume it was in one place.

“No sorry, your dog can’t come in my house, last time it did a wee on the carpet and we’ve just renovated so don’t want to risk any accidents. My dog is also not a fan of other dogs in their home so I don’t know if they’d get along. Let me know if you can make it or not.”

If she cancels then so be it

Your maybe taking it too literally

So dog pee on one carpet is fine? My adult sons both have dogs. The dogs do not come to my house. Grandchildren hugely welcome. Dogs nope.

totally not.

Yeah, I'm afraid I was born literal! I just get a very different mental picture if someone says "all over the carpet" as opposed to "on the carpet"

I did not say it was fine and you know that.

she is totally unreasonable to ask !

1. it makes people feel uncomfortable when they are asked and the awkard ''no'', hence OP's thread
2. the OP has a new carpet etc and of course she does not want dogs all over it, even if the OP has a dog herself, she is aware of her dogs actions etc and will know her own dog
3. last time the friends dog peed on the carpet- totally unacceptable

OP say a firm NO, as awkward as it might be.

Let her cancel. Just say no.

Yeah, not her circus.

I wonder why no one can have her? Probably because they all feel the same way about a poorly house-trained dog that you do.

But OP did say ‘all over the carpet’

Really sorry, that isn’t going to work for us. Hope you can still make it x

You don't need to give an excuse - just say no sorry. If she cancels that's up to her.

Ah. You got me!

This. ^

I am gobsmacked that anyone wants to take their dog to someone else's house when they're visiting... Who does this?! This has never happened to me.

And Springer Spaniels are the worst! They are so bouncy and jumpy and irritating, and the owners often have zero control over them!