To ask DH to wash his hands?

[SENSummer]

Ok, so I’m totally willing to be told IABU maybe I am, looking for some perspective.

I’m an emetophobe and one of my two small kids is disabled so I’m even more aware of cleanliness and germs. We get ill a lot. More than you would expect in my opinion.

DH is a hospital doctor. He works in the hospital all day. I’m often upstairs with the kids doing bedtime when he comes in so don’t observe his routine but tonight I was downstairs and noticed he didn’t wash his hands when he got home. Just wanted through the door and started shoving his hands into the bread bag to make toast and touching loads of fruit in the fruit bowl…etc

I asked if he’d washed his hands. He said yes, earlier in the day before he left work. I was a bit taken a back. I asked if he would mind washing his hands when he comes into the house on a night due to him being in the hospital all day. Both me and the kids wash our hands as soon as we come in from school or activities. It’s not an excessive amount but just seems a reasonable precaution to me.

DH hit the roof and made it clear I was being completely and utterly unreasonable and reminded me firmly that he knows better in these matters than I do.

So I put it to you oh wise MN’s… was I being unreasonable to ask DH to wash his hands?

I rarely wash my hands when coming in from outside, or even when I am preparing food, or after touching pets. I've been like that my whole life and am hardly ever sick. Some people really are OTT about this.

Fewer than hardly any?

@thisishowloween
@popcornandpotatoes did you also not wash your hands during Covid then ?

I am so glad I don’t live with dirty people infecting every surface, light switch and door handle in my home with their bacteria 🤮🤮🤮🤮

Nope - well, not more than usual and I never caught COVID.

Exposure to germs and bacteria is good for you. It’s not healthy to try and totally sanitise your life. It’s why lots of studies say children who grow up with pets have better immune systems.

What about all the germs your clothes & shoes naturally pick up when you're out & about? If you're that bothered about (healthy) germs you'd be taking your clothes off & washing them each time you come in the door

Every surface in your home is covered with bacteria so there is very little you can do, or need to do, about it. Obviously washing your hands periodically & if you have a cold, but not necessarily every time you come inside, helps but exposure to germs is good. I think you need to educate yourself on this as you are not "infecting" anything when you touch it. Do you wash your hands when you enter a supermarket for instance?

I wash my hands before touching food but not every time I come home. Doing that is not universal but a preference.

Who are these unhinged posters who wash their hands at every opportunity? After using the toilet? Yes. After handling pets? Yes. Before eating? Yes. After walking into your house? No that's weird.

I think if you as a family are always getting ill and have "lost half of september being seriously unwell" then probably washing your hand when you get in is sensible. Most people wash their hand throughout the day after going to the toilet, before preparing food and eating etc so don't need to worry unduly about the germs on the front door handle or car steering wheel.

It’s not unhinged to wash your hands after touching a supermarket trolley that will have been handled by countless people that day, some of whom will have had bugs. Or a handrail on an escalator on the tube that’s had tens of thousands of grubby hands on it that day.

I wouldn’t wash my hands if I’d been out for a walk, or just driven in my car but there are situations where it’s sensible. If people really think that giving your hands an extra wash once a day is ‘overkill’ they must be grimy beggars to have such a strong aversion to handwashing.

@R0ckandHardPlace hard agree
obviously some people are dirty scrotes don’t mind touching petrol pumps, pin pads, door handles, car park machines, coins !!! 🦠🦠 etc etc that millions of people have touched, people who don’t wash their filthy mitts after taking a s**t, picking their noses, handling waste food etc. they probably put their fingers in their mouths too 🤮🤮🤮🤮

id rather have clean hands personally

@ConnieHeart I don’t prepare food with my clothing, I use my clean hands.

I wonder if these people who don’t wash their hands before preparing food would be happy to think that the chef in a restaurant doesn’t either, becuase germs are so good for you right ?

Not obsessively no. I washed my hands at times I usually would. I also went to work, didn't disinfect my shopping, sent DD to nursery as soon as it opened again and went out for meals etc as soon as we were allowed during COVID. It's a shocker I'm alive. I'm just not scared of bacteria 😈

This! It’s never crossed my mind to wash my hands when I step in the door. And perhaps it’s anecdotal or coincidence but we’re so rarely sick here, and I’ve got primary aged kids.

I think your DH should do it to set an example to your DC. I don't think he is unclean or bringing in germs and agree he is knowledgeable, but young children are not going to see it that way.

I am with you 💯. And the ‘he knows best’ attitude stinks. He’s coming home from a hospital and he doesn’t wash his hands? Gross. I can’t get over the number of people on here who are saying ‘oh yeah, I never wash my hands coming in from being out/at work/school/tending animals’….Well fine for you all but I think it’s basic hygiene. And if your dh doesn’t want to wash his hands ESPECIALLY when you have young kids, then sorry but he’s a selfish git. And definitely unhygienic. Wouldn’t like to be his his patient! Or does he wash his hands for them?

You didn't mention touching food in the post I replied to, you talked about touching surfaces and bringing the germs into the house. There already millions of bacteria on all surfaces in your home like it or not

Well we do. We change outdoor clothes as soon as we get in. We never sit on our sofa/chairs in outdoor clothes. Not aways straight in the wash, but we certainly don't wear them in the house. We put them separate to "clean" clothes and usually re-wear for another day or so, before they go into the washer. If we've been out using public transport, then they get hung in the integral garage as we don't want germs/dirt from filthy train/bus seats in the house!

First thing we all do innthis house when we come in from work, shopping, bus home, is to wash our hands.
Basic hygiene from childhood.

What about when guests come over?

Fucking hell this is grim. I would literally divorce him over this. No joke at all. Eurgh.
Can he watch some Cocomelon, I think there’s a great song about washing your hands. Sounds about his level.

I’m surprised some of the germ phobes on this thread manage to leave the house at all to be honest.

I know. We are surrounded by germs everywhere but of course they are only dangerous the second they come in to our homes....!

Haha. Have you tested every week since 2020?

Well, no. But if I didn't get sick, then whether I was "infected" or not is pretty irrelevant, really 🙃