To have made my partner switch hotels in London?

[LondonWoes]

My partner surprised me with a long weekend in London, for my birthday. He got us theatre tickets and told me he had sorted the hotel out.

We got on the train today and he started bragging it was £30 a night. That immediately set alarm bells ringing. We arrive and it’s a dump. It’s not even a hotel, but someone’s house with a load of converted rooms. There’s no reception, just a living room, and every door has the same key. That same key also opened the front door. We had been put in a downstairs room, with no window. It was boiling hot.

I told him I wasn’t staying in that hotel. It didn’t feel safe and the vibes were off. He has begrudgingly moved but made me pay, so now im £500 down for my birthday weekend. Was I being unreasonable?

So where is he now?

This is about him showing you what he thinks you're worth, but you know that.

I bet his ski trip/accommodation isn't as budget

I’m going tonight! Very excited

re where he is now - no idea. I’ve turned off my text notifications and check out for his room at the hotel was midday. Presumably he’ll have gone home.

What did he do with the Airbnb booking?

I've always believed that traveling together is a great test for a couple and something that should be done when meting a new partner because you get to see the person out of his enviroment. I've broken up with a few boyfriends right after a trip once their true colours showed and it was just so painfully obvious how incompatible we were.

He probably booked it for July as it's cheaper...........

I was surprised he suggested Five Guys to be honest. Sounds like he'd try to find a Four Guys to save a penny or two.

You totally deserve better OP, being cheap and ruining someone’s birthday is a huge bunting of red flags. It didn’t have to be expensive it just had to be thoughtful…he went cheap ..for a loved one? No way

I’d try for an upgrade when you arrive, not least because sitting next to him will be awkward and you won’t want to be distracted from the brilliant show!

Do you think he will actually turn up for the show?

I booked a cheap self contained Airbnb for me and DS in London recently. I paid £110 for a night which was cheap. The cheapest Airbnb I found was £60 per night. It was a flat in a high rise in Hackney. Reviews talked about feeling unsafe and rooms unsecured sharing the flat with strangers. I guess it's fine if you just want the cheapest place to lay your head but for people on a nice trip this is just absurd - the boyfriend is extraordinarily stingy and naive to think anywhere that cheap would be suitable for a special birthday trip. OP is not wrong not to want to stay in a dodgy sublet with a bunch of strangers on her birthday weekend.

@Hysterectomynext I'm beyond sad that you can't expect even the poor effort that the OPs soon to be ex DP has come up with.
You deserve better.

Yes! If I was dating someone new, I’d want to go away quite early on into the relationship. If it falls flat, the relationship has no longevity.

No way in a million years would I stay in one of those dodgy London Air BnBs. I know exactly the type you're referring to, OP, and nobody stays there for tourism purposes!

Glad you had a nice birthday regardless.

No!! hold on! i hadn't anticipated him turning up at the show, he wouldn't surly, oh op have you got the tickets with you,

Have a wonderful night op,

What a tight ass! Enjoy the rest of your birthday op.

@LondonWoes I am with you on this op .!
He got you tickets but the cheapest.
He then took you to some den.
Once there he thought he could hand you a takeaway burger after lying he had booked a dinner reservation .
Just wtf .

Id have went home or do what you did. .
Just as well you think more of yourself as he clearly doesn’t .

Why didn’t you wake him up and tell him to get out?!?! You told him not to be there when you got back and he had somewhere else to stay!! What a cheeky arsehole!!!! I suppose you had to pay for that room upfront so i would be messaging him telling him to refund the cost of the room he had to himself in the hotel back to you as he wasn’t meant to have stayed there but chose to put you out!

Hopefully, shoved it where the sun doesn't shine*

*i.e. in the windowless hovel room he booked

OP has behaved exactly as most reasonable people would. If a normally reliable partner had told me they had booked a meal and a hotel for my birthday, I would assume that's exactly what they had done - not planned a takeaway burger to be eaten in a shabby, barely legal AirBnB.

I hope you have a lovely weekend OP. Happy Birthday.

I can understand you being pissed off at the first ‘hotel’ and I can understand you being pissed off at no actual dinner reservation but to change rooms and cancel the rest of his nights? Do you guys not communicate when you have issues?
Unless he has form for being an utter dickhead in day to day life, I just don’t understand why people don’t talk to each other like adults. If you’d talked and still wanted to ditch him then fine but blimey, nobody would ever stay married if everyone acted like this!

@rainbowstardrops No one would ever get married in the first plac if the bloke acted like the OP's ex! A dodgy £30 Airbnb and 5 Guys as a "dinner reservation"? I don't bloody think so.

@Hysterectomynext , your posts are so depressing. How have you tolerated such a lack of thoughtfulness for your entire life? You don't have to be satisfied with the bare minimum. It's not too late to change, whatever your age. You presumably have adult children, aren't they thoughtful and kind?

Bin him. The worst thing of all is he's gone off in a self righteous huff while you are the one disappointed and out of pocket.

Maybe he's gone back to sleep in the unsafe, grotty room he deemed good enough to treat you with 😂

I'd be a bit worried he's going to show up at the theatre, though...

Go and enjoy the show. When you get home make sure he’s dumped. You have only been seeing him 18 months, it’s no big loss.