Page 12 | To have made my partner switch hotels in London?

LondonWoes · 2025-10-09T14:48:47+00:00

My partner surprised me with a long weekend in London, for my birthday. He got us theatre tickets and told me he had sorted the hotel out. We got on the train today and he started bragging it was £30 a night. That immediately set alarm bells ringing. We arrive and it’s a dump. It’s not even a hotel, but someone’s house with a load of converted rooms. There’s no reception, just a living room, and every door has the same key. That same key also opened the front door. We had been put in a downstairs room, with no window. It was boiling hot. I told him I wasn’t staying in that hotel. It didn’t feel safe and the vibes were off. He has begrudgingly moved but made me pay, so now im £500 down for my birthday weekend. Was I being unreasonable?

intergalacticplanetary · 09/10/2025 21:02

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 09/10/2025 15:57

What's he got planned for dinner? Yellow sticker sandwiches from Tesco? Going through the bins behind Pret?

🤣

shhblackbag · 09/10/2025 21:03

Ddakji · 09/10/2025 21:00

Don’t tell me to pipe down, love.

Maybe he’s just a tightwad who doesn’t know how to do a birthday treat. I assume the OP knows the state of his finances, and clearly as she’s so surprised by this, he could well afford a proper treat.

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He spent money on a ski trip with friends. The man is just showing his priorities, and OP should pay attention.

SpaceRaccoon · 09/10/2025 21:04

so you can pipe right down because £200 quid is more than plenty of people have to live on each week.

He can manage a skiing trip so it sounds more like priorities.

ZenNudist · 09/10/2025 21:08

So he booked a £30 windowless room, and bought you 5 guys for tea? And made you pay for a proper budget hotel?

What a gent.

Honestly kick him out to sleep in his flea pit. I can't believe he's not at least splitting the room cost.

Ditch Ditch Ditch.

BatchCookBabe · 09/10/2025 21:09

So he was happy to spend money on a ski trip, but bought you a BURGER instead of a meal out, and booked accommodation that cost £30 - IN LONDON?! 😱 God my fanny is drying up just thinking about it.

I bet he is shit in bed too, and will never do any housework or domestic chores. Everything will be left to you forevermore @LondonWoes and if you have kids with him, you will be the sole carer for them. But he will expect you to work (paid employment!)

A mean spirited man is repugnant. You are worth more than this. Dump him. Do NOT stay with him. God help the woman who marries him and has kids with him!

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 21:10

Ddakji · 09/10/2025 21:00

Don’t tell me to pipe down, love.

Maybe he’s just a tightwad who doesn’t know how to do a birthday treat. I assume the OP knows the state of his finances, and clearly as she’s so surprised by this, he could well afford a proper treat.

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Or what? 😂 Your privilege was peeping out. Report me if you’re that offended by it.

Maybe he is a tightwad. Maybe the OP is overly entitled. Although seeing as she thinks he should have plenty of cash when he’s just booked to go away with his mates suggests to me that maybe she doesn’t have the best understanding of his finances.

BatchCookBabe · 09/10/2025 21:13

shhblackbag · 09/10/2025 21:03

He spent money on a ski trip with friends. The man is just showing his priorities, and OP should pay attention.

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Exactly this. He values himself and his pals much more than his woman. Sod that. His ass needs to be dumped.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 09/10/2025 21:19

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 21:10

Or what? 😂 Your privilege was peeping out. Report me if you’re that offended by it.

Maybe he is a tightwad. Maybe the OP is overly entitled. Although seeing as she thinks he should have plenty of cash when he’s just booked to go away with his mates suggests to me that maybe she doesn’t have the best understanding of his finances.

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The point is that his mates are a priority and she is not.

Thingyfanding1 · 09/10/2025 21:19

LondonWoes · 09/10/2025 16:04

It was literally some dive he’s found on Airbnb. He was SO proud.

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Gosh, what a nightmare. I’d be so disappointed! I’m glad you moved and found an alternative. I stayed in an Ibis Style recently and it wasn’t too bad.

Nn9011 · 09/10/2025 21:20

LondonWoes · 09/10/2025 16:13

We were handed one key. I just didn’t feel safe, it wasn’t very secure!

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I'd be annoyed too but just to let you know you have special keys for accomodation like this. Basically each key is cut in a way that it opens the front door but only works for your bedroom. I've had it for an apartment before and they are surprisingly expensive - we were warned not to loose them or they'd be about £100+ to replace!

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 21:21

SpaceRaccoon · 09/10/2025 21:04

so you can pipe right down because £200 quid is more than plenty of people have to live on each week.

He can manage a skiing trip so it sounds more like priorities.

Do you have to pay for a skiing trip all in one go though? If he’s only just booked it, wouldn’t it have been a deposit? If he’s living from pay packet to pay packet, that could have been enough to wipe out any savings.

And, are they living together? If not, then is it really that wrong that he’d quite like to go away with his mates as well as his girlfriend?

DramaLlamacchiato · 09/10/2025 21:24

BatchCookBabe · 09/10/2025 21:09

So he was happy to spend money on a ski trip, but bought you a BURGER instead of a meal out, and booked accommodation that cost £30 - IN LONDON?! 😱 God my fanny is drying up just thinking about it.

I bet he is shit in bed too, and will never do any housework or domestic chores. Everything will be left to you forevermore @LondonWoes and if you have kids with him, you will be the sole carer for them. But he will expect you to work (paid employment!)

A mean spirited man is repugnant. You are worth more than this. Dump him. Do NOT stay with him. God help the woman who marries him and has kids with him!

Edited

This made me burst out laughing! It’s so true!

What a miserable bastard OP

Woodwalk · 09/10/2025 21:26

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 20:30

OP has nothing to feel bad for. As PP have said, it was BF decision to book a birthday weekend for her and in that case he should have done it properly not let someone down by booking dirt cheap rooms with security so poor she’s left out of pocket by several hundred because she now has to book last minute nearby rooms Perhaps he didn’t have the money to do it ‘properly’? Perhaps he thought that it’s just somewhere to dump their bags and not somewhere they’d be spending much time? Perhaps he thought it would be something like this https://www.booking.com/hotel/gb/safestay-holland-park.en-gb.html?aid=2419775&label=metagha-link-LUGB-hotel-1338453_dev-desktop_los-1_bw-17_dow-Sunday_defdate-1_room-0_gstadt-2_rateid-public_aud-0_gacid-21415137781_mcid-50_bc-ABRsVQ_ppa-1_clrid-0_ad-1_gstkid-0_checkin-20251026_ppt-B_lp-2826_r-16437991860520500073&sid=84b16299d7e33a3df3d1504f7f62408d&all_sr_blocks=133845326_88610428_0_2_0%2C133845326_88610428_0_2_0&checkin=2025-10-26&checkout=2025-10-27&dest_id=1338453&dest_type=hotel&dist=0&group_adults=2&group_children=0&hapos=1&highlighted_blocks=133845326_88610428_0_2_0%2C133845326_88610428_0_2_0&hpos=1&matching_block_id=133845326_88610428_0_2_0&no_rooms=2&req_adults=2&req_children=0&room1=A&room2=A&sb_price_type=total&sr_order=popularity&sr_pri_blocks=133845326_88610428_0_2_0__1490%2C133845326_88610428_0_2_0__1490&srepoch=1760037021&srpvid=26dd86bde70701d9&type=total&ucfs=1&
which looks cheap and cheerful and that she’d up for a bit of an adventure like lots of people in their twenties would be. Did he have any idea of her expectations? Did he realise that he wasn’t doing it properly?

The other issue is BF response which was to get sulky and let it be known he wasn’t paying for replacement rooms. A mature person (he’s late 20s so old enough to know better), would have apologised and put his hands up that it wasn’t quite the bargain he’d hoped and if he really is skint let her know that and offer to go halves on replacement rooms If he’s skint then he probably didn’t have £250 to go halves with her. And I’d imagine that having just spent £200 odd on her, he was probably feeling pretty hurt and embarrassed to be told that it was nowhere near good enough and then have to admit that he didn’t have the money to fix it.

It’s him that has caused that mistake to sour the entire birthday weekend and it’s why so many PP are telling OP to bin him. The final straw is that ‘suddenly’ the reservation isn’t what he thought, whatever that means and he’s ‘treating’ her to a birthday dinner in London of a takeaway in her hotel room. And you’re feeling sorry for the BF?! Yes, I’m feeling sorry for him because it sounds like he has really tried to do something nice for her, however misguided, and he may as well have just set fire to £200. She could have made the best of it and they could have had a fun weekend if she wasn’t so intent on showing him that she was worth more. As it is, it’s a complete disaster and if they’re still together by the time they leave to go home, it will be a miracle. If they’re are, there’s no guarantee that she’ll be the one doing the dumping.

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Well he can't have thought that since a private double room there is nearly 3 times the price he paid for the dump he did book!

To have made my partner switch hotels in London?

Megifer · 09/10/2025 21:27

Yea ditch this miserly piss taker. Hes an embarrassment.

MellowPinkDeer · 09/10/2025 21:28

LondonWoes · 09/10/2025 16:18

He’s just let me know he’s ordered our dinner and is picking it up, because apparently the restaurant reservation wasn’t actually a reservation.

it’s five guys. Because I like burgers and it’s a “treat”

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry

You’re making this up aren’t you OP?!? Surely he isn’t this ridiculous?!

Woodwalk · 09/10/2025 21:30

To be clear - I don't think a boyfriend or 18 months (especially if they don't live together, although this is unclear) HAS to spend hundreds of pounds on his girlfriend's birthday. Of course not.

But to 'treat' someone to a weekend away in an unsafe dump and then AFTER THEY HAVE PAID FOR BETTER SAFE ACCOMODATION then turn up with a fast food takeaway at 4.30pm for dinner is ridiculous.

If he wasn't willing to pay the price for a 3 night stay in London but wanted to go to the play (and personally I can understand not wanting to do a 3 night stay at the normal cost - that whole city is extortionate) he should have got matinee tickets for a day trip. Or booked one night - in advance he could have got something for £90.

You choose what present you give someone. He didn't need to choose this - an approximation of a nice trip isn't the same thing as a nice trip. And I'd rather have not gone at all than gone and stayed somewhere gross and dangerous.

MellowPinkDeer · 09/10/2025 21:30

pinkyredrose · 09/10/2025 18:53

Not at the last minute there aren't unless you're extremely lucky! Anyway who wants to fuck around calling lots of hotels on a weekend away. Op got a room at a good price. Now she just needs to swap the guy for a decent one!

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I’ve been looking at London hotels for one night at the end of November and the cheapest is £415. FOR ONE NIGHT.

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 21:31

Woodwalk · 09/10/2025 21:26

Well he can't have thought that since a private double room there is nearly 3 times the price he paid for the dump he did book!

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To be fair, I didn’t go that far into it and I’m not claiming to know the inner workings of his mind. I just think he’s spent quite a bit of cash on a gift for her and I don’t think he deserves the vitriol he’s had on here.

whatwasthatnoise · 09/10/2025 21:34

Did he buy the theatre tickets OP?
If he did, have you checked whether the seats have full view of the stage? I'd be a bit worried they were cheap, restricted view seats 😖

Woodwalk · 09/10/2025 21:36

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 21:31

To be fair, I didn’t go that far into it and I’m not claiming to know the inner workings of his mind. I just think he’s spent quite a bit of cash on a gift for her and I don’t think he deserves the vitriol he’s had on here.

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He would have though. You have to when you actually book, you need to select the room option.

If he had spent similar on a perfectly good physical present and she just didn't like it that's one thing. But to make someone stay somewhere disgusting and dangerous for 3 nights is actually causing them to have a bad time. People wouldn't be being as rude about him if he had bought her something expensive that she didn't like. This is more akin to purchasing a second hand mouldy item - and then being annoyed a person doesn't want it in their home!

Netmumnet · 09/10/2025 21:54

Please say you are dumping him after this!

venus7 · 09/10/2025 21:55

WilfredsPies · 09/10/2025 20:56

There’s nothing wrong with knowing your own worth. There is something wrong with making someone feel like shit because their gift isn’t good enough for you and you think you’re too special for a burger because it’s your ‘birthday weekend’.

A birthday treat in London taking in a show doesn’t involve a youth hostel and a burger. These are, I assume, two working adults their late 20s. Not backpacking students Over the last 12 months or so, I’ve seen a dozen posts from people saying that their household income is over 50k, they aren’t living an extravagant life but they can’t afford to have an odd takeaway once a month, so you can pipe right down because £200 quid is more than plenty of people have to live on each week. You might be able to afford a posh hotel and a meal at The Pelican, and that’s great for you, but he obviously can’t. He’s done the best for her his budget allowed. Perhaps he tried to stretch his budget further than he should because a simple day trip wouldn’t have been good enough for her either.

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It's not how much income people have; that's not the issue.
If his budget was £200, with a little thought and consideration, he could have planned something really lovely...not tried to get as much as he could, so it seemed more.
It's my partner's birthday later this month, I don't have much money, about £100. I've bought him two really lovely presents, and I'll make him a cake, as I do most years. I KNOW he'll like the presents, because I know his tastes, and I've given it a great deal of thought. I won't present it as a luxury holiday in New York and a trip in a private yacht!

PurpleChrayn · 09/10/2025 22:10

Such stinginess would make my vagina close up like the genie’s cave in Aladdin.

BernardButlersBra · 09/10/2025 22:11

£30?! In London?!? Yeah, l wouldn’t have entertained staying there either. It can’t not have been dog rough. Does he “economize” on things for him self or just for you / other people?

Blessthismess2 · 09/10/2025 22:12

Omfg 30£ / night for a hotel in London??? Noway would I stay there either sounds bloody dangerous!!'

OP you need to bin this man off. Thank god you aren't married and it's only 18 months in.