To be concerned about my neighbours?

[Lynn981]

My neighbours are a young couple with a toddler. I normally seem them but I haven’t for 3 days now. All their lights and curtains hahe been drawn but their cars are still on the drive and haven’t moved. Or am I over thinking? It just seems a bit unusual. We are rural and you can’t really get to anywhere without a car, not even local shop. Also they’re not abroad or anything, as I actually spoke to the lady neighbour the other day and she said someone from the council was meant to be coming round

I can't believe what I'm reading. This.isnt true. Someone has been waiting g 4 days, can post on MN but doesn't do anything about a potentially / possibly fatal situation. Please !!!!

I’d be assuming they’re away tbh.

When you live next door to someone you get attuned to their rhythms. You just can't help it. My neighbours house is dark this evening. It's unusual and I notice it, but it doesn't mean anything. It's quite an ego thing to expect that they should always do what we're used to them doing, isn't it?

Lets look at this logically.

One of them goes to work, presumably the man if she is on ML. What are the chances of him not turning up for work three days on the bounce being uncontactable, and them just shrugging their shoulders and saying "Oh well" and thats that?

Zero.

So what, on the balance of probabilities, is most likely? That they are all dead from carbon monoxide poisoning, or they have gone away for a holiday and not told the nosy neighbour next door who likes to have a good butchers when they go out in their cars, go for a walk, turn their lights on and open or close their curtains?

An ego thing ? 🤣

Contact the police on 101 and ask them to do a welfare check

Knock on the door. If no reply it is difficult to know what to suggest.
Can you look through the window?I know curtains drawn but surely a gap.
I would be worried. You are a good neighbour.
Think iI wd give it another couple of days after knocking and report to police. Can you look through letter box and check if any post on floor?

Yeah, it's a bit like thinking that the world revolves around us. Just because something that has become a pattern for us changes we deduce that it is due to some significant change in their lives, but that isn't necessarily so. The change is occurring to us. Do you get what I mean?

Is this a wind up?

I think the worry of being a 'nosy neighbour' here has outweighed common sense.

What a longwinded way to have a dig at someone - why would you have to do that to a complete stranger?

Re the neighbours- nothing wrong with a bit of neighbourly concern surely?
Although I do appreciate that a lot of people here have a thing about doors being knocked on 🤷‍♀️

Knock again - if they answer you can ask them if there’s a funny taste on their water if that’s easier than asking if everything is ok…

I noticed a similar situation next door to me and I knocked and it turned out they were ill and appreciative of my concern and offer to pick up their meds etc.

That’s normal to me and there’s really no need to be worried about stuff like this.

I am not having a dig. It's just an observation because I noticed that my neighbours aren't home tonight, which is unusual. All I'm saying is that it's normal to observe and get used to certain patterns with your neighbours. Don't judge others by your own standards.

I find your post really offensive by the way. I have a particular way of expressing myself. So what? Talk about having a dig at someone.

And how hypocritical! Your post was much longer than mine.

That's ever so sad. You shouldn't blame yourself ❤️

People have decided that they are lying dead including the dog, and I am the stupid one for suggesting that this is, at best, unlikely?

Right. Good to know.

All I can think about here is that little two year old that died because his dad had a heart attack in the chair (and the police failed to do a welfare check after being asked by social services - twice! But that’s beside the point) please call the police OP.

If you're close to your neighbors they likely won't mind that you were concerned. I'd you're not, then you're not losing anything by making sure they're OK if it annoys them. I'm close to my neighbors and once was concerned as they usually tell us they're going a holiday, and didn't this once. They're older so we worried. They appreciated us going out of our way to ensure they were OK, and asked if we could make sure their bins were put out. Brought us a little gift back and we had a good laugh. If the roles were reversed I'd very much appreciate that they cared enough to check on me and my little ones.

You could call the police and report your concerns. They maybe able to carry out a welfare visit.

Fair play to you OP. Hoping there’s a neighbourhood watch person in my street too. Definitely not me… haven’t a clue and never notice what the neighbours do or don’t do let alone whether their curtains closed/lights on etc.
It’s highly unlikely they are all dead but if you’re worried welfare check way to go but give it time first.

3 days with no sign of anyone out for a walk with the pram and the dog, curtains permanently closed, I'd be very concerned, especially as when they went on holiday before, they asked you to keep an eye on the place. .

Don't judge

Have they not just gone on holiday and taken a taxi to the airport?

A pp made a good point about if they aren't on holiday, then the husband should be at work and if he hasn't turned up, his boss or whoever would have raised the alarm. Unless he works for himself.

Does the child go to nursery or play groups? You could check with them.

I swear some of you either love a bit of potential drama or have literally nothing going on in your lives!

Family with young child and dog not seen.

What is more likely? All dead or all on holiday?

Have a word with yourselves!