I’m 26, and I’m not saving for a house or planning to move out

[WeCouldBeNice]

And apparently that’s a very unpopular decision amongst certain family members.

I have grown up always listening to my mum and grandmother saying that they regretted not travelling more in their youth. So I’m doing it, before I can have any regrets.

i work a job that pays just under £25k. Moving out would be miserable. I’d exist to pay my bills and nothing more. I am unable to borrow enough to even purchase a flat in my local area. So I’m spending all my money on travelling instead. Short trips. Weekends away and longer European trips next year.

my older brothers are horrified by this (despite both doing it themselves). They think I should be moved out and renting by now.

my dad turned round to them yesterday and asked if they wanted to ever see their daughters struggling and unhappy. They obviously said no, so he asked why they expected that of me. They couldn’t really answer.

theoretically I could take the money I’m putting into my travel savings each month and use it to save for a house. But I’d never get a big enough deposit to allow me to buy anything even anywhere near decent to live in. And I’d then be bound to a mortgage and never be able to do anything other than sit at home.

is it really that bad to do this?

You're happy, your parents are happy. Your older siblings did the same. I think enjoy it! I hope I can offer the same to my kids when they are young adults.

Do it gal,if your parents are happy,so much is happening nowadays you just don't know,My Mammy head is saying god do save some but my wish id done it head is saying get out there and bloody enjoy yourself now while you can x

So you are instead planning to keep living with your parents forever. You seem quick to react and make excuses not to save. Inflation is high but people are saving for deposits or flats. Surely your current lifestyle is being enabled as precisely because you have the option not to move out. Your parents probably made sacrifices to keep a roof over their head when they were young you are almost laughing at people who work hard, pay bills and own their own house by posting about I intend to travel and spend every penny. I would never have expected my parents to have me at home so much they have a right to enjoy their house on their own terms.

He pays for his phone, travel and social outgoings. He saves around £1k a month. I'm not going to charge him rent.

As someone who’s been in your position, I honestly honestly urge you to rethink the “No point putting money in a LISA as it’s just going to sit there” mindset. Right now at 26 you’re still going and want to travel and have no interest in saving for a home, but honestly one day you will want to buy, and you may wish you’d saved a bit more.
Speaking from experience, I spent my whole 20s and early 30s travelling and spending money on fun (and, to be fair, city centre rent, I didn’t live at home!). I knew I’d want to but a house one day but it felt so far away and impossible that I just didn’t really bother. When I was 30, my dad set up a LISA for me and put £500 in, as a starting point. From 30-34 I put in maybe £200 a year, nothing substantial.
I met my boyfriend at 33 and I’m now 36. Last year we started seriously talking about buying a house, and I had about £1200 in my LISA, with a bit extra from the government top up. I had another savings account (holiday and rainy day money!) with a couple of thousand in, that I added to my LISA. My boyfriend had a LISA with a few thousand in too. But between us, just nowhere near enough.
And basically, we are now on our knees saving and saving and saving. And I just wish SOO MUCH that over the last six years, I didn’t put more money in my LISA, getting more of the government top up as I went along. And I’m not saying I wish I’d stopped the fun, stopped the travel, moved back home… but I do think about £200 a year savings was a bit pathetic, I could’ve banked so much more over the last few years (and still have had fun!) and that would’ve made things so much easier now. I hate being 36 and not yet on the property ladder.
Take what I say with a pinch of salt if you wish, but hopefully it might encourage you to open a a LISA and save, even just a little bit. 36 year old you will be grateful!

I don’t think you’re being either unreasonable or reasonable

What I would say is my husband always regrets not buying a flat and renting out before he went travelling I bought my first property at 22 and by the time we got married, we were able to buy a fairly large house because it had gone up in value so much. If you rent a property out, you shouldn’t have to pay anything. You can go travelling knowing that you Flat is looked after by the agent, and you have an investment to come back to it without having to start at 30 years old which is a no go.

sorry, it’s hard to read. I have to dictate at the moment.

You go girl!!

I'll never buy because i chose having horses over saving for a deposit, always have done.
Future Redpony1 might moan at me, but i don't think she will. The adventures I've had with my horses, the experiences and places they have taken me is the reason i live.
To buy a house I'd have have to given all that up years ago, and for what? Sitting in a house i may own but without my passion? I chose right. i know i chose right.
My brothers have traditional family set ups and they lead such boring lives, that's not me. It'll never be me.

You just sound financially naive OP.

The inevitable upcreep of house prices is not a reason not to buy it’s a reason to get onto the property ladder asap to be indexed in to those rises.

In trying to avoid regrets of your GM you may simply walk right into regrets of your own. The longer you leave it it the harder it will be.

Are their lives boring to them or just your perception of it? Do they say RedPony I’m so bored with my life I’m going to sell up and buy horses instead? How old are you, what is your living situation (not in the stables I’m guessing)?

What about living in a house share with your mates, op? @WeCouldBeNice

much cheaper than trying to pay for everything yourself, you get to be independent and live with your mates instead of your parents. Cos it is a bit of an ick to be 26 living at home with absolutely no aspirations to move out. And your parents finally get their house to themselves after all these years! Win, win all round! 😀

Don’t move out if you don’t have to. Ignore your siblings.

But I strongly advise setting up a house deposit fund. I never saved in my 20s as I told myself I could not afford it. I could afford it I just prioritised poorly. And then by the age I REALLY wanted to live by myself I did not have a deposit set aside. You can’t tell still travel.

Unless your parents want you to leave, stay at home. Set aside a small % to go to your house deposit fund (even 10%.) and budget the rest to include money for travelling.

Future you will thank you!

How old are you? How much of your current income goes on rent? How will you pay rent when you retire?

It's not really my business, but since you've put it out there for judgement, I definitely find it a bit strange and childish.

It sounds like you're living some sort of never-ending Gap year and your parents are indulgent enough to allow that.

At 26 I was a fully established adult and had lived independently for a decade. It does seem that this is the age where you start to see a divide between those who have grown-up and those who don't want to, and in your defence, grown-up life at 26 isn't much fun and is all about deferred gratification.

You do know that if you eventually want what most people eventually want- financial stability, marriage, maybe kids- you can't just wait until the day you want it and order it for next day delivery? It takes years of preparing both mentally and practically to make it possible. No-one goes from footloose de-facto student lifestyle to the white picket fence dream in a week. At some point, you have to do the hard graft to get that life, and it's better to do it in your 20s than 30s.

Your choice, he cannot be described as covering his outgoings though.

Yes. I house/flat shared through most of my 20s and hated it. I was desperate for my own place so with enough for a deposit on the tiniest flat I could afford I stayed there for nearly ten years before I was in a position to upgrade to a two up two down. There was very much the attitude that your first buy was very basic and over the years you could upgrade a step at a time. No one expected their dream home or even something they particularly liked, as a first time buyer. I was never really happy with my flat choice but without it I wouldn’t be mortgage free today.

Another "experiences" person who will bleat about how unaffordable housing is and how it is unfair you can't afford your own place.

It's all about priorities. If you prioritise spending, don't bitch later on when house prices rise and you've got a tiny pension. But you will. They all complain about how unfair it is that people have good pensions and own their own homes. Neglecting to acknowledge that those same people didn't blow their money on "experiences" but invested for their retirement. You can't have both.

I moved out of home but spent my 20s and 30s going on multiple holidays and expensive nights out because I believed I couldn’t afford to buy a flat in London. I am now 48 and massively regret it.

Reading the other comments, I'm going to be very unpopular. But I went travelling and I dont regret any of it. You learn so much from travelling and it's life changing. I will be encouraging all of my Children to go travelling before they settle down to married life and having families of their own. You are young, and don't have any real responsibilities eg. Young children, who are reliant on you.

Go while you can. You only have this time to see the world and find yourself. These memories will stay with you forever. When you are tied down to a mortgage, you can't just go. And when your Children come, u definitely can't just go. I regret not travelling to a few places when i had the chance...eg. New Orleans. You have the rest of your life to worry about paying for your mortgage. You have one life, live it. That's my personal opinion of course.

Norms have changed. There's no 'right' time to leave home other than the time that works for you and your parents. You are living your life actively and positively and your brothers may be jealous from a position of feeling worn down by financial responsibility. You will probably always feel you made the most of your early-mid 20s

But don't do anything that sabotages your future. And try to avoid thinking in either/or terms. Can you have one trip less a year and begin building a financial cushion that gives you choices? Imagine you met someone and could have afforded a house deposit together if it weren't for your lack of savings. Suppose you had the opportunity for a fantastic job that needed a car or other outlay. Suppose you unexpectedly got pregnant....

The property ladder hasn't gone, just the bottom few rungs. It's horribly unfair for your generation, but avoid thinking all or nothing. Could you and the sibling at home buy a bedsit together and rent it out so you have a foot in the market?

Just having retired with my mortgage paid off, I can't imagine the stress of having to carry on with overwhelming work just to be able to pay rent.

Why not? In some cultures multi generational homes are the norm and very successful.

@WeCouldBeNice your living arrangements are nobodies business but yours and your parents.

The end.

Good for you! I wish I’d done it. Tell your brothers to fuck off

Thanks for sharing this, it is a very good example to the OP.

Many people make this choice it’s a very attractive option when you’re young. But then they have to spend their 30s and 40s scrimping and saving for deposits and mortage payments. If you blow your 20s on fun, it just makes your 30s and 40s less fun.

Sounds like a great arrangement. For now.
My only concern is that you don’t seem to be properly planning for the future though.

Do you want children? Because if you do, your life planning so far is going to leave the older them in a much less fortunate place than you find yourself. The safety net your parents have given you will not be there for your kids if you continue as you are indefinitely.
You also seem to be relying quite heavily on promotions to come along. That’s a big assumption.

Also, how much annual leave do you get?! I don’t think a bunch of city breaks using 25 days annual leave really constitutes ‘travelling’; it’s more ‘holidaying’. If you want to travel, perhaps put a little more ambition into that and do it properly! Weekend trips to 1st world European cities is hardly broadening your horizons.

I can and will describe it as that. Thank you very much.