Would you say this was a red flag on a date?

[Margaretbaxter]

I'm so out of the loop so I have no idea.

We'd eaten in a café, I couldn't finish my food as I was full so I got the sandwich to take away.

A couple of hours later we were walking around and I got hungry again so took out my sandwich. He said let's find somewhere to sit down whilst you eat.

I said, thanks, but I'm ok honestly I don't mind walking around with it. He said, no I insist you sit down. I said again that I was honestly ok walking with it but he was absolutely adamant that we sat down.

There was just something that felt a bit off about him not taking no for an answer, am I reading into this?

If it were the other way round i would've not asked again after the first no.

@MoominMai She was on a date. She was on a date when she started her food and then took leftovers from the lunch with her into the next part of her date (they were still together).
My personal view is that’s a bit odd. Fair enough she was full and find to take the leftovers, but to get them back out again (on the same date) and start eating again is strange. That’s why I queried the timeline.
Did the date go on for hours?

Sounds controlling it's up to you how / where you eat your sandwich and I am someone who considers it bad manner to eat when walking in the street.

I would consider it a red flag. Although I'd probably raise it with him to ask why he was so insistent before drawing any final conclusions.

It's not for him to police your manners.

Some of the responses are hilarious on this thread 😂

But this is serious business…I can’t make up my mind without the salient information, @Margaretbaxter. What kind of sandwich was it? What kind of bread? (I’m hungry and my slow cooker still has over an hour left on it).

Seems to have. I’m not sure I’d personally have done that on a date as I’d be too shy in all honesty and not because I consider it bad manners. So here’s the thing, I enjoy taking day trips to different places in the UK and almost everywhere, people are eating outdoors whilst walking about especially when it’s sunny weather. Also, why are some types of foods okay like ice cream to eat whilst walking about enjoying your day out (and they are often messy as heck!) but your common sandwich isn’t okay?!

The big question is, are you going on a second date ??? 🤭

Sounds more like he was concerned for your comfort.
I didn't realise 'til now that eating a sandwich whilst walking is bad manners!
If, as it seems by the comments, some people really do have an issue with it and he is one of them, then his insisting that you sit down would have been reasonable to him. Maybe judgemental, maybe not! Who knows. Ask him? Interesting topic of conversation.

Not a red flag though.

Perhaps he was just trying to be chivalrous? He probably (wrongly in this case) assumed that you would be more comfortable sitting down to eat but didn't want to make him sit down with you. He insisted to stress the point that he really didn't mind at all...?

Sidestepping the whole walking and eating issue, he was perhaps ill-mannered to make you feel as though you'd committed some kind of social indiscretion. Rather than hassling you, the polite thing to do would be to pretend he needed to sit down for a few minutes, which I'm sure you'd have agreed to. Might have been first date nerves.

But why is it bad manners ,? Because you might drop crumbs falling down off of you ? Or because of that prostitute thing like the pp said ? Why isn't it bad manners to eat at a table ?

Am I the only person who has never been told, and doesn't think, that walking and eating is rude? Am I the problem?

Yes, I'd find it very awkward walkingnalong with someone eating..it'd put me off..I think he wws trying to be polite. Sorry OP. On the plus side, not a red flag and quite possibly a green one.

Eating a sandwich while walking is "pretty weird"?! The actual fuck? Honestly, OP, I cannot imagine anyone actually being offended by this.

My take is that he probably imagines you're not being honest saying you're happy to walk, and has taken it upon himself to impose presumed comfort upon you. In which case, I'd say amber flag; have a chat with him and say something to the effect of "next time I say I'm happy doing something, please just take me at my word" and move forward based on his response to that.

Honestly OP as soon as I saw your post I knew this would be how it would go. MN seems very old fashioned on issues like this and all the 'ooh etiquette' shite, like street food isn't a huge and popular thing in the UK! It feels very Hyacinth Bucket to me. My mum did say she was brought up this way but she acknowledged times were changing (and this was when I was a child in the 90s!) and said she would have to get used to it.

I'd suggest throw this bloke back and one of the pearl clutchers are welcome to him. They can discuss how uncouth and poorly brought up people are these days while you live in 2025 with the rest of us who are perfectly capable of enjoying food in a normal way x

Good that you understand. Learn from it.

Patronising arsehole

Jeez I didn’t think it was the best idea to eat and walk but that comment is a bit much!
Can we focus on more important questions like PP have said. What type of sandwich was it?
Please don’t delete for goading, I’m genuinely interested!

I didn't know this about not eating and walking OP. Learn something every day!

Hahahah

Let's just take a second here, can we please restrain from calling other women arseholes thank you

Don’t be a silly billy, Vi.

I wouldn’t like it. I eat while walking, billions of people do. I wouldn’t want to date the sort of person who thinks it’s bad manners or thinks it’s ok to insist I do anything at all when they don’t even know me.
throw him back in for the single women who also think eating whilst walking is something wicked

Why is it bad manners to walk and eat? I have never heard that

Why? And how do you know it's a woman?

I walk and eat becuase I sometimes I am hungry. But I am very aware that some people think it is very rude. I remember at college eating a saudage roll ina corridor to the absolute horror of my male friend. He was so shocked and embarressed for me 😂it was 25 years ago but i will never forget it.😂

It IS a red flag. Whatever people think of eating and walking is immaterial.

You need to be charming on a third date. Suggesting you find somewhere to sit while you eat is fine. Insisting you do so against your wishes is not charming.