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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Was I unreasonable to take my daughters with me to get my nails done?

672 replies

OrlaMcCool · 29/09/2025 17:56

I changed my name for this because I’ve told other people about it.
I was planning on getting my nails done for a special occasion today and I went to a hotel spa I’d been given a voucher for.

I have taken my daughters (5 and 9) with me to a walk in nail bar before and they sit with snacks and their iPad.
No one has ever complained and some customers and the technicians seem to have enjoyed having them there and chatting about colours and designs. If it’s too busy for them to sit next to me then they sit in the waiting area.

The only suitable appointment was today at 4pm so after school. I had no choice so took my girls with me planning to do the same and let them sit and wait with their iPad.
When I arrived the woman on reception said in a really shitty tone of voice that kids weren’t allowed inside not even to wait quietly.
I said they would be really good but she said absolutely not because there were people in rooms having treatments and they wanted to keep a relaxing atmosphere.

I do understand this and didn’t realise that they did nails by the treatment rooms, I asked if there was anywhere else they could sit and I was practically begging.
Another woman came over and said she was the owner and said I needed to make another appointment. I explained I didn’t have a chance and that my daughters would be quiet and watch the lpad and I could turn the volume as low as possible or even turn it off, I was nearly in tears because I was embarrassed and frustrated.

The owner said that no children were allowed in the spa under any circumstances and was hostile and standing like a bouncer at the door. I left because I didn’t want to make a fuss but I was holding back tears and thought the way she spoke to me was rude and unfair.

I know it wasn’t ideal and I probably didn’t think it through properly because I’m used to taking my girls with me to the usual place I go to.
I think they could have been a bit kinder and let them sit in reception but I suppose they didn’t know that they will actually sit and behave nicely.
I’m not asking if I was unreasonable to take them, I want to know if I’m unreasonable for expecting the staff to have been less aggressive and for speaking to me that way in front of my children and making them sound like a nuisance.

I was going to complain to the hotel that rents the space to the spa but my sister said I was being ridiculous and told me to post for opinions on here.

OP posts:
TeaForTheTillermanSteakForTheSun · 29/09/2025 17:59

They initially said no and you kept pushing it, no wonder they were less patient than you hoped.

Why didn't you call ahead and ask if they would be OK if you took your dc in? Would have saved a lot of hassle.

Snorlaxo · 29/09/2025 17:59

Your sister is right- you’d be unreasonable to complain that they have a no kids rule.

If your kids had heard some adult conversation eg about sex then I’d bet you’d be the first to complain. It’s acceptable to have child free spaces as it’s a private business. While you’re probably right about your kids being well behaved on their iPads, some people go to nail salons to escape kids.

Jellybunny56 · 29/09/2025 18:00

Of course YABU, why would you think children would be welcome in a spa? I imagine if you’d said “yes okay no problem sorry” and left the first time rather than pushing for your kids to be allowed to stay after being told no then they would have had no need to raise voices etc. Your mistake and then your fault it escalated so yes, you are being completely ridiculous to think of complaining!

StrawberrySquash · 29/09/2025 18:00

I've said unreasonable because, I think you should have checked. You don't know the setup of each place. You can't just expect it to be okay.

Also this bit is definitely unreasonable I explained I didn’t have a chance and that my daughters would be quiet and watch the lpad and I could turn the volume as low as possible or even turn it off. Headphones* *or no sound at all in a public place. Nobody wants to hear other people's ipads.

SkinnyOatFlatWhiteForMePlease · 29/09/2025 18:01

In fairness you were being a nuisance though, you were told no then caused a scene ‘practically begging’ when you didn’t like the answer.

Doidontimmm · 29/09/2025 18:01

Please tell me you weren’t going to let them use their iPads without headphones. I would be so annoyed paying for a spa to have to listen to kids iPads.

GloryFades · 29/09/2025 18:01

You’re not generally unreasonable to take your kids to a nail salon, but to expect to be able to take your kids to an adults only spa that does nails is BVVVVU.

Horsehow · 29/09/2025 18:02

Baffled as to what’s so important about getting your nails done. You’re a grown adult. Set a better example to your kids.

AgnesMcDoo · 29/09/2025 18:02

If their policy is no kids then YABU

Katherine9 · 29/09/2025 18:02

It’s generally accepted that under 18s are not allowed in spas.

BauhausOfEliott · 29/09/2025 18:02

They have a no children rule. That’s all there is to it. A spa isn’t like a walk-in nail bar.

They couldn’t let two kids aged five and nine sit alone in reception for the duration of your nail treatment - the receptionist isn’t a babysitter. I’m sure your kids are capable of sitting quietly on their own but obviously the hotel staff don’t know that and can’t say yes to it.

MiseryIn · 29/09/2025 18:03

Sorry I think they were right. “Turning the volume low or even off” indicates that you actually intended the volume to be on which would be very very wrong.
Im not a fan of a spa myself but I know people pay a lot for them and a couple of kids sitting on an iPad wouldn’t be great.

GretaGip · 29/09/2025 18:03

Being nearly in tears because you can’t get your nails done is pretty ridiculous behaviour.

Shouldbeworkingnotreadingtalk · 29/09/2025 18:03

I’m also going to say YABU. I don’t want to look at kids when I’m at a spa area. I don’t want to monitor my language or be polite to kids. Sorry. I’m sure they are quiet, but if they let one person do it, everyone will start doing it. Kids on iPads is even worse.

BCBird · 29/09/2025 18:03

I would not want to be having any treatments with children present

Bobiverse · 29/09/2025 18:04

They said no, you caused the drama by pushing and not listening. They had to be firm with you. If you don’t want people to speak to you like that then listen when you’re told no.

Stompythedinosaur · 29/09/2025 18:06

I don't think kids are usually allowed in spas.

Temporaryname158 · 29/09/2025 18:06

The fact your bargaining chip was to turn the IPad volume down or even off summarises all the reasons kids weren’t allowed.

an iPad should always be silent in public, having it out loud at any time is so rude and inconsiderate, and the fact you’d have it on in a spa at all is unreasonable.

they were right to say the kids couldn’t stay.

Viviennemary · 29/09/2025 18:06

The salon has to consider other customers. They want psace and quiet so they can relax and enjoy their treatment. Probably don't want to listen to chattering kids.

BallerinaRadio · 29/09/2025 18:07

Yes. Yes you were.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/09/2025 18:07

I agree with the posters who have said that a spa is very different to a nail bar, @OrlaMcCool. If I had shelled out for a massage or other treatment at a spa, I wouldn't be happy to have to listen to childrens’ iPads - frankly I would be very surprised if a spa let under 18s in.

Sorry - I think you should have checked in advance, and you were in the wrong to try to argue your way in.

Limon87 · 29/09/2025 18:07

sounds like a tough day. Look no judgement we get so little time for self care as parents and I know something like a nail appointment can mean so much. A lot of salons near where I live let kids in but some don’t. But I respect that the salon has a policy on kids they won’t budge on. Also nail salons ain’t great with all the fumes for smallies. Don’t be hard on yourself, don’t be embarrassed either you’ve not committed a crime! Just forget about it but maybe look at alternatives next time. X

noctilucentcloud · 29/09/2025 18:08

I don't think they were being unreasonable saying no - if most of their customers go to relax it's not fair to have kids there. They have no way to know if your children were going to be well behaved or not. And having their ipads on low volume would still be really annoying. You're also very unreasonable to think they could be left in reception where someone else would be responsible for them. At the end of the day they are a business, they have to look after the majority of their customers - it's not fair on them for them to potentially lose custom or receive complaints. Nail's aren't a life or death situation, it's not like you were denied healthcare. And they were reasonable to let you rebook without charge seeing as they lost money on your slot today. Move on, chalk it up to experience and next time you're going somewhere new check.

Rookie93 · 29/09/2025 18:08

When I go to a spa for treatments I want a relaxing and child free environment and I'm paying for that privilege. You could have easily rung before hand to check if children were allowed before chancing your arm like that.

OrlaMcCool · 29/09/2025 18:09

TeaForTheTillermanSteakForTheSun · 29/09/2025 17:59

They initially said no and you kept pushing it, no wonder they were less patient than you hoped.

Why didn't you call ahead and ask if they would be OK if you took your dc in? Would have saved a lot of hassle.

I should have called ahead and asked but I am aI used to taking them with me that I didn’t think it would be an issue.

I wasn’t being overly pushy and was clearly upset, they could have been kinder instead of guarding the door in a hostile way.

OP posts:
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