Was I unreasonable to take my daughters with me to get my nails done?

[OrlaMcCool]

I changed my name for this because I’ve told other people about it.
I was planning on getting my nails done for a special occasion today and I went to a hotel spa I’d been given a voucher for.

I have taken my daughters (5 and 9) with me to a walk in nail bar before and they sit with snacks and their iPad.
No one has ever complained and some customers and the technicians seem to have enjoyed having them there and chatting about colours and designs. If it’s too busy for them to sit next to me then they sit in the waiting area.

The only suitable appointment was today at 4pm so after school. I had no choice so took my girls with me planning to do the same and let them sit and wait with their iPad.
When I arrived the woman on reception said in a really shitty tone of voice that kids weren’t allowed inside not even to wait quietly.
I said they would be really good but she said absolutely not because there were people in rooms having treatments and they wanted to keep a relaxing atmosphere.

I do understand this and didn’t realise that they did nails by the treatment rooms, I asked if there was anywhere else they could sit and I was practically begging.
Another woman came over and said she was the owner and said I needed to make another appointment. I explained I didn’t have a chance and that my daughters would be quiet and watch the lpad and I could turn the volume as low as possible or even turn it off, I was nearly in tears because I was embarrassed and frustrated.

The owner said that no children were allowed in the spa under any circumstances and was hostile and standing like a bouncer at the door. I left because I didn’t want to make a fuss but I was holding back tears and thought the way she spoke to me was rude and unfair.

I know it wasn’t ideal and I probably didn’t think it through properly because I’m used to taking my girls with me to the usual place I go to.
I think they could have been a bit kinder and let them sit in reception but I suppose they didn’t know that they will actually sit and behave nicely.
I’m not asking if I was unreasonable to take them, I want to know if I’m unreasonable for expecting the staff to have been less aggressive and for speaking to me that way in front of my children and making them sound like a nuisance.

I was going to complain to the hotel that rents the space to the spa but my sister said I was being ridiculous and told me to post for opinions on here.

It is more of a beauticians, I posted before that I think they just use spa in the name, I think that’s why I didn’t think it’d be such an issue because there are no open areas except reception and where they do nails. The rest is separate treatment rooms.

Trust me, other customers are not interested in talking to a stranger’s child. When I finally manage to sort my own hair or beauty appointments it’s a bit of me time. I’ve sorted childcare for my own kids and I certainly don’t want to talk to someone’s else’s child or hear the dulcet tones of Peppa Pig, or Roblox or K Pop Demon hunters.

It’s just a given that these places are not for children.

What??

Why don’t they just not have iPads - I mean obviously it’s moot because they weren’t allowed in, but in a nail bar that does allow children like you thought this one was, I am staggered you thought iPads without headphones was at all acceptable.

It sounds like you kept on asking so they probably got frustrated that you weren’t getting the point and leaving. However, they shouldn’t have been aggressive about it (but I think making it clear that you children were a potential nuisance wouldn’t have happened if you had accepted that they couldn’t stay and had left).

People go to places like this for relaxation and possibly to get away from their own kids for a while. If they turn up and someone else's kids are there, they'd be pissed off.

This is simply a case of location, experience and manners:
Nail bar on the high street - probably OK.
Hotel spa - never OK.
Anyone listening to anything without headphones - always unacceptable.

Exactly this. The whole ethos of a spa is to escape and relax and pamper yourself. 5 and 9 year olds are not conducive to ANY of those things.

You sound very entitled

What was their excuse with having an issue if they had allowed it before? It’s rude of them to cancel your appointment when clearly you wouldn’t think there would be a problem when there wasn’t one previously.
Did they answer your review? It isn’t as easy as people think to get an appointment when you have no one to help with childcare.

A no child policy but you think that shouldn’t apply to you? You sound massively entitled!! Do not complain to the hotel, you were told no and you were the one to keep pushing it, the staff probably got fed up of you.

You actually think strangers enjoy talking to your DC in these situations?

It really doesn’t matter whether your kids enjoy going! They don’t belong there, and no adult wants them in their adult space.
STOP taking them. No one has said anything because they’re trying to be kind, or too embarrassed to confront you. YOU need to stop putting people in that position and not take your kids with you.

OMG I missed this - you let them wander around harassing other customers and only call them back if the other customers start to look uncomfortable?? Jesus Christ.

I wonder if your usual place is booked up, or just permanently “booked up” for you and your kids.

It isn’t as easy as people think to get an appointment when you have no one to help with childcare

It’s not a medical appointment. Just don’t have your nails done if the only way you can do it is to have two children listening to iPads out loud and talking to other customers, most of whom do not want to talk to your DC, no matter how politely they respond.

This! I never understand it when there’s kids on trains without headphones listening at top volume which is bad enough. But in a spa? Even low volume in any public space is really annoying OP.

People go to these places for a bit of relaxation and to get away from children - even their own. It’s totally unreasonable to expect to take your daughters along. If you have no help with childcare that’s too bad. No one else wants to hear the iPad or listen to them getting involved and excited and picking out the colours for you 🙄

I take my kids everywhere with me and I never just expect any business to accommodate them!
Even child friendly places I always call ahead of when booking to make sure there is space/availability etc. YABU, definitely!

YANBU. I took my sleeping baby to a walk in nail salon to get my eyebrows threaded a few weeks ago and felt a little embarrassed doing even that. I have no idea why you thought that would be okay.

I had/have the same issue with my children talking loudly about what they were watching on screens, and being disruptive in public places as a result. So I went old-school, and we took books and colouring books out with us. Try it.

This. A million times this.

It's not fair on the other guests and not at all fair on your girls. Shoving them on an ipad so you can have nails done is shoddy parenting.

It’s not a place for kids and whilst some nail bars might not care, this place clearly has a standard it wants to maintain and politely told you that they couldn’t proceed. No-one else there wants to listen to kids listening to something on an ipad. You can’t complain just because you don’t like their policy.

You were unreasonable to take them and you then argued the toss when the venue said no. If I were them I wouldn't give you another appointment.

I don't know why you think you can inflict them on other people in an adult environment. People who go for beauty treatments probably don't want to chat with them.

It isn’t as easy as people think to get an appointment when you have no one to help with childcare.

Do they not attend school and do you not get annual leave?

You were told no and you have said ok and left not make a song and dance about their policy