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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want a coffee shop with a no children policy

391 replies

Amiterriblex3 · 28/09/2025 11:51

In a coffee shop and have to listen to a bunch of 2 year old screaming, absolutely screaming at the top of his lungs. Their mothers might be immune to such noise but I am not. I would be embarrassed if my child screamed like that

OP posts:
CafeDuck · 28/09/2025 13:25

and the first airline to introduce adult only flights will make a gazillion pounds

dottiedodah · 28/09/2025 13:25

Callipygion I am the same! Went to our local cafe the other day.about 6/7 people sitting outside, nursing a single coffee each .One had a piece of fruit!The little waitress was running up and down to serve them.I would rather have the Mums and babes in. It's just their entitlement .They were there for a good 2 hours chatting away(not even working!) just a coffee morning which lasted until lunchtime !

Didimum · 28/09/2025 13:27

Fine dining restaurants have adult only service. Coffee shops can too.

HennieGirl · 28/09/2025 13:27

OP these kind of threads always bring the gentle and permissive parents out of the woodwork.
I have a young child and I agree. She knows not to scream and wail in quiet places and if she did, she would be told not to. If she continued, we would leave.

not all parents believe in discipline sadly and following through with consequences.

My daughter has SEN, I also an neurodivergent myself.

HennieGirl · 28/09/2025 13:29

Enigma54 · 28/09/2025 12:02

There you go OP, a nice little project for you: a child free coffee shop! What shall we say, 0-3s are not permitted? What about teens, people in large mobility scooters who take a load of space, people who talk/ laugh loudly?

Now now, the OP said child free. Not disabled people with mobility scooters. No need to make something out of nothing.

AliceMcK · 28/09/2025 13:29

TinyTeachr · 28/09/2025 13:17

Toddlers do occasionally do unacceptable things. My 1 year old did a really loud scream in church this morning - she'd found a corner with a great echo. She was delighted with herself. Those saying that they should be parented better, while I don't disagree, young toddlers do daft and unexpected things that you can't always anticipate. That's rather different from a neurological 5 year old acting up.

I think most cafes rely on families for custom during certain parts of the day, so you're not likely to get rid of them totally! But if you're really keen perhaps suggest certain times that your local cafe could have as "adult only". Sounds from this thread like there might be a market.

I love it when we go to a cafe that has a child friendly zone. We go and sit there with our 4 kids. Others that want a quieter space go far from the zone. Our favourite cafe has a downstairs bit with lots of toys etc. All the kids love to be downstairs and they love having playmates. You can't hear much at all from upstairs, which is where child free people tend to congregate.

Omg your post reminded me of my then 2yo who went up the the priest during Sunday mass once, she wanted to be blessed with the older children and didn’t want me with her, the priest missed her and started to turn away, she stood on the alter steps and stamped her feet causing the whole congregation to burst out laughing, the priest turned round and apologised to her and made a move to bless her so she legged it up behind the alter where I had to go get her from. Everyone was laughing including the priest. She’d never ever stamped her feet like that before but it was so funny.

C152 · 28/09/2025 13:31

I don't think cafes should have 'no children' policies, but it would be great if they could ban parents who refuse to parent. Children play up sometimes. Everyone who is a parent knows this. But if you're in a public place where it's impacting other people, you don't ignore the behaviour. You tell them to stop/distract them/carry them out, if necessary. Parents sitting there doing nothing or ignoring their children are the ones who should be banned.

GoodVibesOnly21 · 28/09/2025 13:31

I bought a coffee machine. So I drink nice coffee in my lovely, comfy & quiet living room. I appreciate this might not be an option, depending on who else lives in your house though!

Finteq · 28/09/2025 13:32

SalamiSammich · 28/09/2025 11:55

Open one if you think it would be financially viable.

Agree
If it was financially viable there would prob be one already.

And if there is already one.

You can just go there.

dreamiesformolly · 28/09/2025 13:33

Iamthemoom · 28/09/2025 13:21

Really don’t understand why you would choose to post about wanting child free spaces on a parenting forum?

Errm, because it isn't solely a parenting forum. Have you not been on here very long?

HennieGirl · 28/09/2025 13:33

Spookyspaghetti · 28/09/2025 12:22

I think banning other humans is quite unpleasant and I’d rather be around someone else’s screaming child than around many entitled adults. Especially as the place would probably be packed to the ceiling with dogs.

Banning other humans? So do you think female only spaces should be banned because it bans other (male) humans?

Sugarfish · 28/09/2025 13:34

Go to a pub instead? Most do coffee and are usually quiet in the day.

Sharptonguedwoman · 28/09/2025 13:34

GarlicBreadStan · 28/09/2025 11:52

2 year olds scream. They're toddlers. They push buttons.

Are the parents trying to stop them from screaming by entertaining them? This may change my perspective slightly.

Show quote history

Take them outside.

GLC789 · 28/09/2025 13:35

We had one local to where I live open up last year. Closed within 6 months due to lack of customers. Small rural area though. I think a no children coffee shop in a big city centre would work better. Not for me though, my shadow of an 18m old loves our coffee dates!! Once shes had a fit and caused choas, easily sorted, we just left 🤣.

EmpressaurusKitty · 28/09/2025 13:35

Kids weren’t a problem in my local coffee shop this morning, but I moved tables because the man nearby slurping his soup was driving me nuts.

They have a notice up asking people not to use their phone speakers, which I like.

CJsGoldfish · 28/09/2025 13:37

I don't understand why anyone is offended/upset because others don't want noisy and/or misbehaving children ruining their (hoped for) quiet cafe time 🤷‍♀️
I'm assuming that the posters who seem most put out by the mere suggestion of a child free anything are part of the reason child free cafes sound so so good!

TheWytch · 28/09/2025 13:38

dontcomeatme · 28/09/2025 12:02

I think you're all talking about a library. OP open a library and quiet cafe fusion place. It will be like in the movies, every time someone makes a noise everyone can automatically and simultaneously say SHHHHHHH and look really judgemental as they do.

When did you last visit a library? Those days are long gone.

It's like feeding time at the zoo in my local one. No peace anywhere now.

CatHairEveryWhereNow · 28/09/2025 13:41

LandSharksAnonymous · 28/09/2025 12:14

My local small one doesn't allow kids! It's not explicit - but they refuse to sell anything that isn't coffee or water. So no orange juice, 'babyccino' or anything like that. Their cakes all contain alcohol or nuts as well, so typically not things suitable for children. No space for prams and no high-chairs either.

I'm quite a fan - whilst it doesn't say 'children aren't welcome' it's pretty evident when you walk in. 😃

Edit - and just to say to those who clearly think any shop operating such a policy would fail...mine definitely isn't! There's usually a queue before it even opens on a Sunday 😉

Edited

We went in one like that yesterday - man with toddler walking with hands and crawling getting in everyones way with no apparent awareness of that and at one point 5 dogs barking at each other with owners sort of shrugging in very small space.

It was still okay experince and they had more wanting to come in then there were seats.

MrsLizzieDarcy · 28/09/2025 13:41

I don't know about others but I've become much more noise sensitive since turning 50, and I just don't want to be surrounded by loud noises. It makes me jumpy and on edge. A quiet cafe would be bliss.

inezname · 28/09/2025 13:47

'2 year olds scream. They're toddlers. They push buttons.'

When my 2 year did that I wound just put him outside the cafe, and would sit back down to enjoy my coffee.

He'd be hysterical but stop after 30 seconds when I'd go out to get him and ask if he would like to come in and act nicely.

(I would see him through a glass door). So he would be safe, but I would absolutely not let him scream inside a public place ever. After he turned 2 so could understand he can't act like that.

Septictanking · 28/09/2025 13:50

Please, please, please, open this coffee shop! OP😂I would be there every single day, no kids, no phones, just everyday chit chat and quiet calm. Heavenly, everywhere you go these days it's loud loud loud, there must be plenty of need surely? for truly quiet spaces, as a PP said even libraries are full of noise these days, the other day I was witness to one loud phone call, and a gaggle of screaming fucking kids, piss off it's a library, ssshhhh😂

Skodacool · 28/09/2025 13:52

GarlicBreadStan · 28/09/2025 11:52

2 year olds scream. They're toddlers. They push buttons.

Are the parents trying to stop them from screaming by entertaining them? This may change my perspective slightly.

Show quote history

They don’t have to scream, I know plenty who don’t. If mine did that I would take them out.

AzurePanda · 28/09/2025 13:53

My children are all grown up now but I generally find the behaviour of other adults more intrusive, anti social and downright annoying than children. This particularly applies to long haul flights.

Bodypumpmum · 28/09/2025 13:57

YABU

its discrimination to exclude families with young children from a coffee shop. Maybe stay at home if you want a peaceful experience?

Iamthemoom · 28/09/2025 13:58

dreamiesformolly · 28/09/2025 13:33

Errm, because it isn't solely a parenting forum. Have you not been on here very long?

Show quote history

I’ve been here for years. It’s literally in the title! I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who finds it really goady posting anti child posts on a parenting forum. But sure, Mumsnet isn’t just for mums anymore. These days it’s also for trolls, misogynists and apparently people who hate children, because us mums can’t have nice things and need to learn to share!