AIBU to be a little sad at the idea of dd not believing in Father Christmas anymore?

[Readyforslippers]

Dd is in Year 3 at school (all aged 7/8), she absolutely believes in Father Christmas at the moment. How many more years am I likely to have? I feel perhaps someone at school may spill the beans soon?

I understand some parents don't agree with it, but for me her belief is something quite magical and I feel a little sad at the idea of that ending. AIBU to feel this way and to try to make this year a little extra special just in case? I suppose the problem is that I could end up saying that for several years.

She's growing up too quickly, it's like I've blinked since she was tiny and she's now in key stage 2!

Vicar of Dibley (gently trying to tell Alice the Easter Bunny is not real): You know, like when your mum tells you about Santa Claus...
Alice: What about him?

I do know what you mean, but I don't do anything particularly to perpetuate the belief. Presents are from Father Christmas and I don't tell her we buy or wrap them, but that's it. I think it's the time flying that makes me sad, though I'm also happy she's growing and becoming herself.

Did you read the second reason we are getting a cat at all?

Yes. But you aren't keen on cats and in my opinion an animal deserves better than someone who "begrudgingly" adopts it.

I think it’s totally ok for a child that age to still believe however my DD is 9 and in a mixed year class, so I’m preparing myself that this year may be the year.

Santa has never been the biggest part of Christmas for us though. We make Christmas a big thing throughout December with lots of activities, crafts and Christmas themed games. He brings a small gift at Christmas and fills the stocking, mummy and daddy bring the rest under the tree.

Rather than making it bigger/more special this year, weave more traditions in that will see you through future years

Ds is in Y6 and still believes, we plan to tell him after Xmas as we feel he needs to know before he starts secondary school

My 8 year old still firmly believes. They are a young 8 and quite naive but I am expecting an arsehole at school to spill all the beans soon.

A lot of kids like to just carry on going along with it, you can still have the traditions for years.

I think mine now go along with things for me! They are in year 5 and 6 and neither have specifically asked if he is real, but there were a lot of hints last year to suggest they knew it wasn't real. I am still booking a Santa visit this year and expect this will be the last. I don't ever recall my parents telling me he wasn't real, I think it's just one of those things you naturally ignore - especially if you want the Santa stocking!

I think it's just as magical/lucky to have parents who, after a long and exhausting day, make the effort to arrange that bloody elf (and think up a new place for it, 24 nights in a row argh) compared to it actually being real. I think dd will see it that way and I can't wait for her to help us with it for her brother's benefit.

Wow. Big leap from I'm not keen on cats to I'll be abusive to an animal in my house. I'm not keen on animals but a decent human being and very keen on making my children happy. HTH.

I knew,at 6, kept it a secret from my sister until I was 10 (she was 6 then). I remember it as a crushing disappointment in my childhood. The magic came back with my children. My oldest is,10 and autistic. He has asked if Santa is real and I've struggled soooo much as I didn't know how to play it. I could see how that would break his little heart which needs to believe in beautiful, magical things to bear how hard reality can be. I'm actually dreading Christmas this year as I don't want the joy to go so early...

This thread has made me realise that DS is in year 6 and kind of has to know this year that he’s not real 😁 obviously he already thinks he’s not real, but I need to make sure he knows it, before secondary. I forgot that is now!
I still think that Santa is real though. Why else are there stocking and presents. You see images of Santa round the neighbourhood all December. Santa definitely exists. Also DS will still get a stocking forever, would just be mean to stop that! And obviously would raise questions for younger DC. I got a stocking until I left home. Never had the ‘is he real’ conversation with my parents, we all just played along and ended up assuming he was not in fact a man who comes into your house at night, but a concept.

Nonsense. She may not but you can. Ours are early 20s living full independent lives. Carrot, mince pie and alcohol of choice is still left out. Stockings are filled. Goodies to share eg jigsaw, board game, favourite consumables etc are scattered on the hearth on Christmas morning. Rudolph still drops bits of carrot outside, sometimes sooty footprints on the rug. Santa will continue to come as long as he is welcomed!

I’m sorry but the year 6 believers are having you on.

My mother taught years 3 and 4 for decades and said the pattern was the same. The year 3s had lots of questions about the logistics of FCthen by year 4 all the questions stopped as they knew really but played along with it. This was pre internet too.

My eldest is 8, almost 9 and he’s been questioning Santa for 2 years. However he’s very observant and switched on! I think this year he ‘knows’ but isn’t saying tbh. He has a younger brother who I could probably convince until he’s a teenager 😂

when the time is right and he asks we will tell him the story that now he can be part of that magic for his brother. Makes me very sad though. I’m already thinking maybe he won’t want to come on our Santa visit next year 😭

I would have expected an 8 year old not to believe, even if they keep that from you. Just treat it normally and when they admit it to you, ask them not to spoil it for any younger children in the family.

I didn't say you'd be abusive. That's a leap. We evidently have different opinions on pet ownership, so I'll leave it there. No need for "HTH" - I wasn't in need of help, thank you.

Not always, my friend’s daughter cried when she told her before year 7! She wasn’t a ‘young’ 11 year old either!

You need a lot of help, you sound deeply unpleasant. Apols for the derail @op am tapping out now. I hope you manage one last magical one!

I never believed in Father Christmas and was never told he was real - it was just a big game/tradition that we did every year.

Ah, not to worry everyone's different. I recommend getting a boy cat and having him neutered, they are the softest, floppiest, soppiest creatures.

I don't remember ever thinking it was real, because my logic side kicked in and said it wasn't possible. Obviously there is a brief time in my life I don't remember (very young child) but I probably wasn't aware of it either! We never lied to my son about it, and he's still had lovely Christmas times, so it's not the be all and end all if they stop believing. I do get the mixed emotions at realising they're growing up though!

She definitely does believe right now. If she asks I will of course tell her at that point, but she hasn't so far. She always wraps a present up for him and leaves it out with a blanket and a book to have a rest with, not something we suggested, just that she wanted to do.

I have an 18yo, 15yo, 10yo and 8yo. 10yo probably still goes along with it, 8yo still believes but possibly this will be the last Christmas?

It's a day that has to come. They're growing up! I have had many years of having Believers. I can't complain too much🤣