Really embarrassing poo question

[Donetrying1]

l can't believe l'm typing this but l am! Full disclosure, l have a GP appointment next Thursday so l'm doing the right thing but just wondered if anyone at all had ever had problems getting themselves clean after a bowel movement??
l open my bowels, use either wet wipes or that Wype gel and 'think' l'm clean. I then go for a wee a little while later and it's like l've never wiped at all! I then have to go through the whole palaver and this can happen 2 or 3 times. It never used to happen so something has changed, although no clue what! I'm in my early 60's sometime constipated so l take Movicol which makes it softer, otherwise l'm at a loss to explain it, hence the GP appointment. Just wondering if anyone else has had the same? Sorry if this is TMI! But thanks anyone in advance!

Firstly - never be embarrassed. I poo through a hole in my tummy. Hours of entertainment.
Secondly - perhaps the Movicol is making the poop a bit too soft. Our sphincter muscles can become weaker with age. Maybe you leak.
Good luck.

These look like the ones everywhere in Korea, where they don’t flush toilet paper either. I did struggle to get the hang of it, shooting water everywhere.. Is that why you don’t drink the tap water there, even though technically it’s fine ? Maybe theirs are properly plumbed in though, as everyone has one. They have them in Italy too.

I am going to get my gp to have a look next week because I suspect I have a rectocele. The front of my vaginal wall feels a bit different than it used to I think. Also my last two birth experiences were very short and much more intense than my first labour of average length. - I hadn’t realised that could be a cause for rectocele.

I do have IBS and it may be that.

I did have weak pelvic floor muscles but have been doing the exercises for 6 months / daily pelvic floor exercises (Tik Tok is handy for that. There’s a few female physics I follow on there - the Female Physio Co comes to mind but the are others) and they got me started in a regular routine. They solved my bladder urgency problems but not this problem.

I agree with the posters who have warned movicol can make this problem worse. That was my experience.

I do know after menopause a whole lot of inconvenient difficult health problems occur - at least in my case.

I’m in Australia and my son is a plumber. He won’t install anything that is not up to code because it could mean losing his license. I’d assume it’s the same for the UK plumbers.

GPS are atrocious for diagnosing pelvic floor issues. Even my OB couldn’t. I went to a pelvic floor physio who diagnosed mine. They cannot be fixed by exercise alone (bladder prolpases can benefit hugely from exercise if not too seveee) but rectoceles are nearly impossible to fix without surgery. Highly recommend reading up on it. Make sure you’re assessed standing and bearing down as when laying down everything gets artificially pulled back up. I’m hoping to have pelvic floor repair in a few years. I also got mine from a very fast labor.

GPS are atrocious for diagnosing pelvic floor issues. Even my OB couldn’t. I went to a pelvic floor physio who diagnosed mine. They cannot be fixed by exercise alone (bladder prolpases can benefit hugely from exercise if not too seveee) but rectoceles are nearly impossible to fix without surgery. Highly recommend reading up on it. Make sure you’re assessed standing and bearing down as when laying down everything gets artificially pulled back up. I’m hoping to have pelvic floor repair in a few years. I also got mine from a very fast labor.

That’s the thing though, define “should”. Isn’t it common for women’s bodies to change after giving birth?

I have piles, having had no piles before kids. My body is as it should be, in that it’s normal for its age and experiences. I struggle to wipe clean now in the way I did before but short of having surgery, I’m not sure what I can do. It’s not always practical to have a shower after using the toilet.

I think it’s refreshing to see it’s a common issue - us women should be able to be honest and open about what our lives look like as we age (as should men).

In a few decades, I’m sure I’ll be wetting throughout the day, needing pads. Again - not nice but completely normal!

I've not RTFT sorry
I will take a bet that its your pelvic floor which is the issue. See a specialist PF physio (my cousin paid privately) do the exercises and (possibly) get some oestrogen pessaries (from the GP) for any vaginal atrophy

Thank you for thatThank you for sharing the info.

One food that I've noticed leads to a nice clean bum after pooing: simple home-made vegetable soups.

Things like onion and broccoli, cauliflower, celery etc. Funnily enough it works best if you do properly process the soup once cooked, with a stick blender.

When that's my main food intake, I find I barely have to wipe at all. Might not work for everyone.

Omg! I am so glad you posted this as it's been happening to me. GP looked at it and was puzzled. Had no explanation for it.

I've been leaking since having my 2nd child 10 years ago (labour 4 hours beginning to end). Child was 9lb with a big head!

It's definitely got worse in the last couple of years since menopause.

3rd degree ear too.

Wash your bum in the bath.

If you stepped in a big pile of shit, you wouldn't consider your shoes clean simply cause you wiped with some tissues. You'd give them a good rinsing.

Same applies to your buttocks. Very common practice to wash your bumper in Africa and Asia. Not sure why Europeans insist on this antiquated and unhygienic approach.

OP isn’t the one being dismissive. It’s others.

Thank you for explaining this about the sphincter! This makes a lot of sense to me (having had a third degree tear). I think I need a physio too.

Just to say I'm not an expert on rectoceles!
Someone told me years ago about one of the causes being a quick birth, may not be entirely true .
I had a quick birth with my second child but a prolonged labour with my first which has definitely weakened my pelvic floor- eg stress incontinence when coughing/ sneezing.
I also had forceps with both births and episiotomies.
I had seen an incontinence physio years ago who gave exercises to do, I forget to do them of course!
Anyway, it doesn't bother me that much at the moment.

If anyone has any issues they should see their GP to get checked out. Ask for a referral to a specialist physio if you feel you need it.

Whats your recipe for the soup please?

Ha found my people. Not name changing because why should I! As pps have said, happens to so many. I have a real issue with anal skin tags from previous piles (from childbirth - thanks babies), it makes cleaning really hard. Improved by using reusable bum wipes from cheeky or by any kind of bidet / shower method after a bowel movement.

I had surgery on the tags recently (and also on a fissure and to remove loads of internal piles) but have yet to see much improvement - they swelled up horribly post surgery and am kind of regretting having it done- but I can come back and let you know what the consultant says after my first post op with him in October. He told me I have to take fybogel every day for rest of my life (or just normal psyllium husk - which is what fybogel is). I also take magnesium at night and I have flaxseed in my breakfast. Have to say I’m enjoying not being constipated! And wiping is ok - I have loads more nooks and crannies unfortunately post surgery but hoping that will reduce. I used to take movicol and also found that smeary - so perhaps fybogel is better?

I was provided a toilet that sprays up into my bum by the council as I struggle to keep myself clean down there after developing arthritis in my back. I know there are diy alternatives that can be fitted to other toilets. If I do a no 2 anywhere else, I use decent wipes with balm enfused in them, and I have to stand with my leg on the bath edge. So I do miss having that toilet when on holiday as no businesses seem to provide them in disabled toilets and even adapted accommodation.

This. Do you have children? If so, did you tear after birth? I had a severe tear after my first and my consultant for my second said that it’s a common issue after any stage of tear/episiotomy. I image also linked to a weak pelvic floor too.

Someone said above, magnesium helps. As do those water squirty bottles (that’s a proper technical term, don’t you know 😆), that you can clean yourself with afterwards. I use cotton pads. Be careful with wipes as they can cause long term irritation!

Yes, saw a womens physio for this. Eventually had surgery as had large skin tags adding to problems

Ok, so this is gross, but I have found that if you push your finger (covered in toilet paper!) up your anus a little bit it cleans just inside and stops all the smearing.
I read it on reddit, or somewhere similar, where there was a discussion on how to get your bum clean.

With those plumbed in douche nozzles, does it mean you are having to wash with cold water?

I get this if i eat too much fatty food. Dont use wet wipes. I use a little baby lotion on the loo paper to wipe. More gentle.

Just very basic soup recipes. For example, for cauliflower, I'll cook a small chopped onion and couple cloves of garlic in a few tablespoons of olive oil, add some dried herbs (thyme, rosemary etc), cook lightly until onion is tender, then add a good splash of white wine, and enough vegetable stock to cook half a chopped cauliflower and a diced potato. Add seasonings like white pepper and nutmeg to taste, simmer until everything is tender.

Then zap well with the stick blender. Perhaps add a little Greek yoghurt before serving.

I went to a physio who specialises in pelvic floor issues after I gave birth abroad. I got six sessions free through my health insurance and paid for more after that at a subsidised rate.

When I moved to the second clinic nearer me, which treated women of all ages, not just post-partum mums, it said in the literature that “wiping a lot” after a bowel movement can be a symptom of a pelvic floor issue, especially in women who have had hysterectomies.

Don’t know if that applies to you op but hope you can get this issue sorted. 💐