Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to report every man who lies about his height on hinge

371 replies

PoliteEagle · 19/09/2025 22:01

i've really had enough of it. Had another hinge date this week where the guy claimed to be 5'8. He was 5'5 at most, more towards 5'4. I reported his profile to hinge for lying about the height. How they expect to build a relationship on lie, I dont get it

OP posts:
kkloo · 22/09/2025 02:40

FableLies · 21/09/2025 18:38

Sexual attraction is a funny thing. I know exactly the type I am sexually attracted to, if I know little else about a person. Tall. Athletic. Dark haired and eyes. Dominant energy. However, initial sexual attraction, for me, is different from sexual attraction which develops after knowing someone. My husband only ticks one off my list above.

I'd hate to be in the dating scene now, where photos and messages are what you're judged on. Must be hard. It's like a manual of you. Advertising.

I've learnt I'd likely date most people, and see what happens.

Yes it works differently for different people, there are some like yourself where it grows later on.

For me personally I've never been sexually attracted to someone I wasn't sexually attracted to from the start.

However, initial sexual attraction, for me, is different from sexual attraction which develops after knowing someone

It's different for me also. Initial sexual attraction isn't nearly as strong as that sexual attraction combined with knowing the person, but knowing the person and liking a lot about them doesn't create sexual attraction that wasn't initially there in the first place.

Whatsallthisthen2025 · 22/09/2025 04:01

PoliteEagle · 21/09/2025 18:13

Ok so women are to blame again for the wrong actions of men. He lied but not it is my fail because I am shallow. Male entitlement has no borders as is female people pleasing

Hush now, don't you know women are allowed no boundaries or preferences at all? Men can demand a pornbot 9000 completely hairless body, that never ages, sex on tap, she works for money and also does all the housework and child rearing while never gaining an ounce of weight or speaking to him harshly.

Women are not allowed to only fancy men who are a bit taller than them. Hashtag BeKind😅

The internalised misogyny on mumsnet never fails to make me laugh. Or the men who who are furious about being short and feel entitled to the woman THEY want even if she doesn't want them, perhaps, out in droves 😅

SemiRetiredLoveGoddeess · 22/09/2025 04:20

PoliteEagle · 19/09/2025 22:01

i've really had enough of it. Had another hinge date this week where the guy claimed to be 5'8. He was 5'5 at most, more towards 5'4. I reported his profile to hinge for lying about the height. How they expect to build a relationship on lie, I dont get it

Never mind online date sites populated by short arse men.

For every man who lies about their actual height. There must be untold numbers who also lie about their imaginary penis size!

That's men for you Chuck

OwlBeThere · 22/09/2025 05:09

JKLolling · 20/09/2025 11:12

Not trying to start a bun fight, but all the women saying they were expecting someone 6 foot and then the man was only an inch or two bigger than them, at 5'1...

YOU are short, so why are you looking down on other people being short? Your sons might be short!

I am a tall woman 5'9 with a 6'1 husband. He would look completely ridiculous with a 5'1 woman, as or more ridiculous than a 5,4 woman with a 5'3 man. Shorter men seem to look for short women, so I'm not sure why you are appalled by it.

My husband and tall brothers have said they wouldn't go for a shorter women as then they may have short children. There's not enough 6' men to go around all women, so it makes sense that the shorter women are attracting the shorter men.

if it's aa disadvantage it's a disadvantage to men AND women, stop acting like you are a 5'1 super catch who should have pick of the tall men. If it's genetics and nature, then being short is a disadvantage that YOU also share, doesn't matter how slim or well dressed you are.

(disclaimer: I don't see it as a disadvantage or inferior, variety is what makes us great. But it's like obese women with a BMI of 40+ moaning that a man turned up obese with a BMI of 40+....)

Edited

My daughter is 5ft, her boyfriend is 6ft2 or 3. They don’t ’look ridiculous’

330ml · 22/09/2025 05:52

SemiRetiredLoveGoddeess · 22/09/2025 04:20

Never mind online date sites populated by short arse men.

For every man who lies about their actual height. There must be untold numbers who also lie about their imaginary penis size!

That's men for you Chuck

When do these untold numbers lie?

It’s not a question I have ever asked.

Whatsallthisthen2025 · 22/09/2025 06:00

I'm 5'3 and once dated a man who was 6'5" - the only time it was an issue was when I had to stand on a step to kiss him :D We looked great, a very attractive couple.

There's so much stupidity about this - you are not taking anything from anyone else's dating pool by dating people who want to date you. And nope, being short is NOT a disadvantage for women, over all.

And obviously women are hoping if they have sons they will get their height from their dad, which worked out well for me tbh. The father of my kids is 6 foot 1 I am 5 foot 3 and they are (girl) 5'9" and boy 6'2"

Kind of glad she stopped at 5'9" as being taller than that actually is a bit of a disadvantage for women, still, in dating at least.

MumofSpud · 22/09/2025 06:51

I had a first date with someone from a dating website - he said he was 6ft 1 …. And he was! I thought of this thread! Maybe there could be the opposite - a star rating where people look like their profile pics!
Had another date last week and he had 6 pics up -I was hoping pic number 1 would turn up - nope not at all - they should have to be date stamped!!

330ml · 22/09/2025 07:09

MumofSpud · 22/09/2025 06:51

I had a first date with someone from a dating website - he said he was 6ft 1 …. And he was! I thought of this thread! Maybe there could be the opposite - a star rating where people look like their profile pics!
Had another date last week and he had 6 pics up -I was hoping pic number 1 would turn up - nope not at all - they should have to be date stamped!!

That’s not such a bad idea. Like on eBay where you give a rating for “Meets item description”.

FlubandSlub · 22/09/2025 08:13

Cruc · 19/09/2025 22:04

I wouldn’t report it personally no but I agree It’s bizarre!

i dated one guy who claimed he was 5ft 7, met him and he was eye level. At most there’s an inch between us. I’m 5ft 1.5

I don’t actually mind short guys but it’s the fact he lied and also the fact before we met he made comments about men who get lied to and catfished. Talk about double standards.

He turned out to be a complete idiot with some narc tendencies anyway.

Edited

People should call out liars when they first meet, I.e. "You claimed to be 5'8" and your very obviously not! While I don't my dating short people I make a point of not dating LIARS"! and walk away with head held high. Same if they look nothing like their photo 🙄

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 08:19

FlubandSlub · 22/09/2025 08:13

People should call out liars when they first meet, I.e. "You claimed to be 5'8" and your very obviously not! While I don't my dating short people I make a point of not dating LIARS"! and walk away with head held high. Same if they look nothing like their photo 🙄

Have you done that to your dates?

OP posts:
SpackelFrog · 22/09/2025 08:23

Surely the best idea is to use an unflattering photo/description so people are pleasantly surprised when they see you in real life?

FlubandSlub · 22/09/2025 08:39

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 08:19

Have you done that to your dates?

Every time 🤨

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 08:41

FlubandSlub · 22/09/2025 08:39

Every time 🤨

Wow, well done. I am not that brave yet. How was their reaction?

OP posts:
gannett · 22/09/2025 08:45

FableLies · 21/09/2025 18:38

Sexual attraction is a funny thing. I know exactly the type I am sexually attracted to, if I know little else about a person. Tall. Athletic. Dark haired and eyes. Dominant energy. However, initial sexual attraction, for me, is different from sexual attraction which develops after knowing someone. My husband only ticks one off my list above.

I'd hate to be in the dating scene now, where photos and messages are what you're judged on. Must be hard. It's like a manual of you. Advertising.

I've learnt I'd likely date most people, and see what happens.

This is my experience too. I have a definite type when it comes to the kind of man who catches my attention if they're just a random stranger in public or a celebrity on TV. Similar to yours, quite conventionally attractive - brown hair, good cheekbones, clean-cut etc etc. There's not much correlation to the men I've had actual sexual chemistry with, nor the men I've become attracted to after getting to know their characters better. And there's also nothing more disappointing than getting to sleep with a man who, on the surface, ticks every physical box I'm attracted to, then finding out that you can still have the opposite of sexual chemistry with them.

Photos alone are a really shit way of gauging attraction, even if they're accurate. And you have to assume everything anyone says about themselves on a dating app massages the truth to an extent. I agree a straight-up lie is bizarre but every single person on those apps, man and woman, has carefully selected the "best" photo of themselves rather than the most realistic one. It's the nature of the game.

gannett · 22/09/2025 08:54

Whatsallthisthen2025 · 22/09/2025 04:01

Hush now, don't you know women are allowed no boundaries or preferences at all? Men can demand a pornbot 9000 completely hairless body, that never ages, sex on tap, she works for money and also does all the housework and child rearing while never gaining an ounce of weight or speaking to him harshly.

Women are not allowed to only fancy men who are a bit taller than them. Hashtag BeKind😅

The internalised misogyny on mumsnet never fails to make me laugh. Or the men who who are furious about being short and feel entitled to the woman THEY want even if she doesn't want them, perhaps, out in droves 😅

Edited

This is a ridiculous exaggeration. If a man demanded any of that I, and most people I know, would think he was a shallow twat (and really fucking creepy).

In general I think people who bang on about what they're not sexually attracted to are uncouth bores, it's tremendously rude. And that's widely accepted for most physical characteristics - you won't find many people in 2025 who will make a point of saying they could never be attracted to a certain race, or even a certain hair colour, even if they have that preference. (I have never been attracted to a certain race or a certain hair colour myself, but I don't see any need to put this information out into the world - I just get on with being attracted to other people.)

However there is something about women's weight that brings out all the shallow male twats and their important opinions on how they could never be attracted to a fat woman, and in exactly the same way there is something about men's height that brings out the shallow female twats who think it's incredibly important to tell other people at length how they're viscerally disgusted by any man under 5'10". So boring.

gannett · 22/09/2025 08:54

Whatsallthisthen2025 · 22/09/2025 04:01

Hush now, don't you know women are allowed no boundaries or preferences at all? Men can demand a pornbot 9000 completely hairless body, that never ages, sex on tap, she works for money and also does all the housework and child rearing while never gaining an ounce of weight or speaking to him harshly.

Women are not allowed to only fancy men who are a bit taller than them. Hashtag BeKind😅

The internalised misogyny on mumsnet never fails to make me laugh. Or the men who who are furious about being short and feel entitled to the woman THEY want even if she doesn't want them, perhaps, out in droves 😅

Edited

This is a ridiculous exaggeration. If a man demanded any of that I, and most people I know, would think he was a shallow twat (and really fucking creepy).

In general I think people who bang on about what they're not sexually attracted to are uncouth bores, it's tremendously rude. And that's widely accepted for most physical characteristics - you won't find many people in 2025 who will make a point of saying they could never be attracted to a certain race, or even a certain hair colour, even if they have that preference. (I have never been attracted to a certain race or a certain hair colour myself, but I don't see any need to put this information out into the world - I just get on with being attracted to other people.)

However there is something about women's weight that brings out all the shallow male twats and their important opinions on how they could never be attracted to a fat woman, and in exactly the same way there is something about men's height that brings out the shallow female twats who think it's incredibly important to tell other people at length how they're viscerally disgusted by any man under 5'10". So boring.

LilacReader · 22/09/2025 09:42

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:05

WTF. What is this obsession with height? It really doesn't reflect well on women

Why is it an obsession? I don't fancy guys shorter than me, same as I don't fancy thin or bald guys - just the same as I'm not everyone's cup of tea for whatever reason. We all - thankfully - have a different type.

LilacReader · 22/09/2025 09:48

PoliteEagle · 20/09/2025 10:09

My preferences may be shallow but it is my prerogative.

I don't think you're shallow at all. You know what you find attractive and a turn-on. Being shallow is more about NOT going out with someone because although you fancy them they don't earn enough money etc.

KimberleyClark · 22/09/2025 09:58

I’m just glad my SIL is not shallow. As I said she’s 6ft and DB is 5ft 7. She was looking for someone her intellectual equal - she’s a very successful senior hospital consultant and she and DB both have PhDs. She is a willowy blonde (DB is stocky and muscular) and could certainly have dated someone taller than her had she been that hung up on height. They have been together. 19 years and have a delightful son (who, for the very limited amount that that is worth, is over 6ft).

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 10:06

KimberleyClark · 22/09/2025 09:58

I’m just glad my SIL is not shallow. As I said she’s 6ft and DB is 5ft 7. She was looking for someone her intellectual equal - she’s a very successful senior hospital consultant and she and DB both have PhDs. She is a willowy blonde (DB is stocky and muscular) and could certainly have dated someone taller than her had she been that hung up on height. They have been together. 19 years and have a delightful son (who, for the very limited amount that that is worth, is over 6ft).

How shallow it is for her not to date guys without phd lol and not get attracted to guys who are in trade. So shallow to have preferences. Why refusing to date someone who is kind and funny just not phd or working in a supermarket. Very very shallow

OP posts:
TryingAgainAgainAgain · 22/09/2025 10:12

😂 "willowy blonde" is a phrase you only hear in tabloids, bad novels, and Mumsnet.

KimberleyClark · 22/09/2025 10:12

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 10:06

How shallow it is for her not to date guys without phd lol and not get attracted to guys who are in trade. So shallow to have preferences. Why refusing to date someone who is kind and funny just not phd or working in a supermarket. Very very shallow

I don’t think it’s shallow to want to date your intellectual equal because it says a lot about how compatible you really are. There is no point in dating someone who is nice if they bore you/don’t share your interests and you can’t have the kind of conversations you’d like, that would not bode well for the future. It is shallow not to date people because of a random physical characteristic like height that tells you nothing about the kind of person they are.

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 10:23

KimberleyClark · 22/09/2025 10:12

I don’t think it’s shallow to want to date your intellectual equal because it says a lot about how compatible you really are. There is no point in dating someone who is nice if they bore you/don’t share your interests and you can’t have the kind of conversations you’d like, that would not bode well for the future. It is shallow not to date people because of a random physical characteristic like height that tells you nothing about the kind of person they are.

So there is no point dating someone who is bore to you but there is a point to date someone you are not feeling attraction for? To date without attraction is not shallow but dating without bore is not shallow? Smells of hypocrisy here

OP posts:
ThatCyanCat · 22/09/2025 10:26

KimberleyClark · 22/09/2025 09:58

I’m just glad my SIL is not shallow. As I said she’s 6ft and DB is 5ft 7. She was looking for someone her intellectual equal - she’s a very successful senior hospital consultant and she and DB both have PhDs. She is a willowy blonde (DB is stocky and muscular) and could certainly have dated someone taller than her had she been that hung up on height. They have been together. 19 years and have a delightful son (who, for the very limited amount that that is worth, is over 6ft).

That's very nice that they have a successful marriage but I don't see why it means women can't have a height preference. Is your brother shallow for liking willowy blondes? Was he ever obliged to date short, fat brunettes without degrees?

PoliteEagle · 22/09/2025 10:26

KimberleyClark · 22/09/2025 10:12

I don’t think it’s shallow to want to date your intellectual equal because it says a lot about how compatible you really are. There is no point in dating someone who is nice if they bore you/don’t share your interests and you can’t have the kind of conversations you’d like, that would not bode well for the future. It is shallow not to date people because of a random physical characteristic like height that tells you nothing about the kind of person they are.

And by the way how would you SIL feel if she matched with a guy who had phd in math in his profile only to come to date to find out he lied and he works as an uber driver but he had to lie in order to get dates as women prefer smart guys

OP posts: