Parents said my maternity photos were “erotic”

[Ttcgirl89]

I had maternity photos taken on the beach when I was pregnant. I live in Australia and am from NZ and recently my parents came to visit us and meet our baby. I was looking through photos and my dad said that the maternity photos were “erotic” and my stepmum agreed. My brother asked what we were talking about and my Dad was like “you don’t wanna look at them, they’ll make you blush”.

I sent the photos to them after I had them done months ago and I thought they were so lovely and special. They were taken at “our beach” where my husband and I swim in summer I am wearing a dress in all of the photos and my bra is covered, with the buttons down the front undone to show the belly. My husband and I don’t see anything erotic about these photos at all and I was shocked that they thought that. I feel really awkward and embarrassed now that I sent them to them if that’s what they thought about them!

Is this a weird reaction to seeing your daughter’s maternity pictures?

Fine to have maternity photos done for yourself. Attention seeking to share them. It’s the very last thing I would want for myself and I wouldn’t want to see friends/families but that’s my personal view on them.

I’m sure she WGAF 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP that is so gauche of your dad and stepmum to say! How awkward. LOL at all the posts claiming to not comprehend maternity shoots. I’ve never had one but they are a completely usual photo shoot. Bizarre to sexualise and even more bizarre of your parents to do so!

It’s depressing because there’s a huge load of replies being snarky about her having a maternity photoshoot. Just because it’s not something you’d do you really don’t need to be upset that other people do.

I think it’s weird they saw them as erotic. think they’re so common now that I’m surprised that hadn’t come across them before. I’d say it’s a them problem

When I was 9 months pregnant, my husband took photos of me each time. They were in non revealing underwear, bump on show.

I would never show these to anyone else. It seems weird. Even though they’re not ‘erotic’ (far from it), no-one else needs to see them. I’m at actually laughing at the idea of showing them to the grandparents!

I think I’d describe your shots as cringe/contrived rather than erotic- mainly because of the half done up dress.

I’m really struck by the people on this post (and on Mumsnet in general) who feel such a strong need to tell other women that they’re nothing special, their pregnancies, children, babies are nothing special etc.

Is it a generational difference, as we move to a more individualistic culture? Is it jealousy? Are some people just mean and bitter?

I was very sick during my pregnancy and am generally private about my body so I wouldn’t go in for this sort of thing at all. But I wouldn’t form negative judgements about someone else for this kind of thing at all! If I gave it a second thought, I’d think “good for them”.

😂

I find them really quite gross 🤢 Nobody wants to see them, only the two people involved.

I think clothes that are unbuttoned could be seen as potentially erotic in a way that just being photographed in a bikini on the beach wouldn't be.
i wouldn't sweat it though

Every maternity professional photo I’ve seen has definitely been on the “many it sexy” end of the spectrum. If buttons that would normally be done up in every day life were undone for the shoot then your dad has a point.

i don’t get this whole professional photo thing more generally, didn’t even for my wedding, just hit a friends dd to take them

Dying 😂😂

I am more aghast that any father would look at a picture of their daughter, at whatever age, in whatever they are or aren't wearing and declare them erotic. He is the weird one in this situation not you for choosing to document a lovely stage in your life.

Agree 🩷

agree 🩷

the dress wasn’t sheer at all, just a normal dress that you could wear anywhere. But yes, it was open from belly down because I wanted to show off my baby belly! I didn’t realise people found it so grotesque until reading all these comments 🤣🤣

fair enough, this was my actual parents, not my in laws but maybe they felt the same

Mumsnet gets weirdly Amish about these sort of things, and will run and run and run with oh but if you’ve took pictures, it must be for social media!!! If you’re not getting married in a potato sack with no photographers clearly it’s because you’ve been influenced by social media.

as if people haven’t shared photos long before sm, I sat in people’s living rooms in the 90s flicking through people’s holiday snaps. It’s fun to have pictures taken of special events so you can look back at them etc ignore the weird comment from your parents

You are making me larf. 😂 I know it's a rainy Sunday afternoon, but remember - the sun is shining behind them gloomy grey clouds. I don't think you are witless at all and if I did, I'd never be so rude as to say so. 🤓

At least there hasn't been it's a stupid a American thing. They hate us Americans. You do you, but the pictures were beautiful.

Fair enough. Obviously I could have kept the dress done up but I liked my baby belly and I wanted it showing in the photos. Waited entire life to be pregnant and I was very excited about it to be honest!

I think the whole sharing pregnancy details a bit weird. It’s like “look we’ve had unprotected sex”

I assure you it isn't a beautiful time in every woman's life. 5 pregnancies, 3 births, endless vomiting, cramps, symphysis pubis disfunction and poor sleep... not a time I want immortalised in photos. I looked like I wanted to die for most of it.

OP, it's all a bit Instagram but if you like them, that's all that matters. I definitely wouldn't show other people, though. That's not on.

I think the idea of maternity photos is lovely. I wouldn't personally do them with my belly exposed, but rather with a nice dress that frames the bump. But then again I live in the US where many people do maternity shoots.

I saw a lady put shopping the other day with a crop top on and her very pregnant belly on display. It appeared quite crass to me.

But I do think it's perfectly ok to celebrate your body for what it's doing, I just don't care to see that much exposed skin from anyone while buying groceries haha.

And yes, you absolutely should feel special while you're pregnant. It's a special and wonderful time and you should be able to share that with your family. Just maybe you being used to seeing people taking photos with lots of skin exposed, made you forget that others may not be as comfortable with it.

I think it's gross of your dad to imply the photos are sexual. That's just mean. He could have just said nothing.

Having said, we had someone show us similar photos and it was very uncomfortable. Seemed like something more personal that would only be shared with her husband.

So, I'm not sure, but congrats on your pregnancy and hope you and your husband can enjoy the photos in times to come.

Well mortality surrounding pregnancy and birth is, unfortunately, still unacceptably high in a lot of countries.
And I certainly wouldn't be comfortable " celebrating" my new child until he/ she was safely delivered and was known to be healthy.
You only have to read MN to know how many people's lives are impacted by their children having physical and mental special needs.
But that wouldn't fit the social media gloss that life is perfect would it?
After all its the image that counts, not the reality, isn't it?

😂😂

You like it, fine, but why do you think anyone else wants to see it?

Wow, youve hit some weird nerves here op.

The pics are hard to imagine for me but if they make you happy, that is lovely.

Your dad calling them erotic sounds gross and mean spirited.

😂😂